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Zombie Bake-Off

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It's time for the annual Recipe Days bake-off in Lubbock, Texas. Soccer moms and grandmothers gather to show off their family recipes, learn new secrets for the perfect shortcake, and perhaps earn a chance to be on the famous cooking show, How Would You Cook It, Then?

When the bake-off is crashed by a federation of pro wrestlers � including American Badass, Jersey Devil Jill, Tiny Giant, The Village Person, Jonah the Whale, the Hellbillies, and the fan favorite Xombie � all hell is set to break loose. Your heart beats faster as you anticipate who will come out on top in the ultimate showdown of the soccer moms or pro wrestlers. Anything can happen.

Enter zombies.

An infected batch of donuts has transformed most of the wrestlers into mindless brain-eaters and the doors of the convention center have been chained shut, leaving the survivors locked inside, forced to fend for themselves against the hungry dead.

Possessing the intensity of a shotgun to the face, Zombie Bake-Off is a stripped-down masterpiece of blood and doughnuts from celebrated author Stephen Graham Jones.

255 pages, Paperback

First published January 27, 2012

138 people are currently reading
1375 people want to read

About the author

Stephen Graham Jones

243Ìýbooks12.9kÌýfollowers
Stephen Graham Jones is the NYT bestselling author thirty-five or so books. He really likes werewolves and slashers. Favorite novels change daily, but Valis and Love Medicine and Lonesome Dove and It and The Things They Carried are all usually up there somewhere. Stephen lives in Boulder, Colorado. It's a big change from the West Texas he grew up in.

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5 stars
139 (16%)
4 stars
269 (32%)
3 stars
309 (36%)
2 stars
90 (10%)
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30 (3%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 174 reviews
Profile Image for Melissa Bennett.
916 reviews15 followers
July 31, 2024
Did you ever have an author that you wanted to like? One that had books that seemed right up your alley? Yet, in the long run, their writing style does not appeal to you? This is how I feel about Stephen Graham Jones. I have loved every idea that he's put out there. I've bought numerous books of his and yet, I don't really enjoy them. I am not sure exactly what it is. I am guessing it is his writing style. It does not hold my attention and I find my mind drifting while I am reading. As much as I want to like his stories, they just don't appeal to me. This book ended up being the worst one for me so far. While I could see how it would be entertaining for some, it was all over the place for me and in the end, I just didn't care what happened. Even though I have a couple more books that this author wrote to read, I doubt I'll buy anymore.
Profile Image for Casey.
689 reviews56 followers
October 20, 2021
FINALLY some zombie lore that's different in the best sort of way. Perfect Halloween read during GBBO season.
Profile Image for unstable.books.
242 reviews23 followers
February 26, 2025
Even better upon my second time reading. Off-the-wall, batshit fun!
Profile Image for Fiona Knight.
1,416 reviews286 followers
March 25, 2018
...our brains are fascinating to the recently dead because they’re both the most alive part of us,� Kent says, “the seat of intelligent, emotional, sentient life, and they’re also the most dead, where dead is understood as being beyond pain, which life is basically the avoidance of. And they’re both of these at the same time—just like the walking dead, right? Alive but dead. So it’s familiar. It’s like them. And that makes our brains taste good or something.

Only Stephen Graham Jones could produce a book with that passage above, plus fart humour, plus incredible amounts of gore and a really interesting new take on what happens to a zombie's severed limbs. Not just that, but make it work!

This is a short book but a great one - the characters leap off the page almost as soon as they're introduced, the horror will not let down the zombie fans, and the humour is always a relief from the carnage. If you're sick of zombies, I doubt you'll find this run of the mill. If you're NOT yet sick of zombies, then this is a new take on a much loved genre that deserves a spot on your bookshelf.
Profile Image for Howard.
361 reviews14 followers
January 4, 2025
Sounded cooler than I found it to be. Almost stopped a quarter of the way in. Enjoyed it more once it became a full on zombie battle. Was less enamored with the earlier wrestlers assaulting "baking" moms sexually and physically.
Profile Image for Eddie Generous.
754 reviews85 followers
November 1, 2019
Outrageous. Absurd. All kinds of fun. Maybe missed out on a few opportunities with the Zamboni's functions.
Profile Image for A Bookish Boi I Fear.
78 reviews
June 21, 2024
The premise of this book is the kind of idea that sounds really cool if you're stoned but you should probably just sleep it off. Stephen Graham Jones unfortunately ran with it and delivered this super tasteless horror comedy. Hard pass
Profile Image for Michael.
75 reviews9 followers
July 25, 2017
This book did not work.

I've been on a Stephen Graham Jones kick ever since I stumbled upon Demon Theory a few weeks ago. It was a well-crafted story with a unique and interesting delivery and I liked a lot about it. I followed that up with Growing Up Dead in Texas, which wasn't perfect, but was one of the most deeply affecting novels I've read in recent years. Next I picked up Zombie Bake-Off. Judging by the other two of Mr. Jones's books I'd read, I guessed that Bake-Off would be goofy and over the top, but well-crafted. What I got instead was the kind of puddle-deep shlock you expect from over-ambitious high-schoolers. I caught a whiff here and there of the things that made me love his other books, but it didn't do much to dissipate the miasma this book puts off. I stuck with it for 17 chapters and gave up.

Let's talk story. Once upon a time, a cooking convention in Lubbock, Texas was terrorized by the early arrival of the professional wrestlers who had booked the convention center for later that evening. The event coordinator manages to get them corralled away only to have a box of contaminated donuts turn them all into zombies. Also, for some hand-wavy reason, the doors have all been chained shut by a skeevy promoter, and the phones are down, and there's no cell service, and the loading bay is blocked by...ya know what, you get it. Standard low-budget zombie movie stuff. Don't get me wrong; I love the occasional Sharknado-style plot, but it has to at least be fun. The only thing this one brought to the table was the professional wrestlers, but I found them more irritating than entertaining. Maybe if I liked professional wrestling it would have some appeal, but I doubt it. The story is just a dud.

Let's talk characters. They're all bad. It's like a greatest hits compilation of tired cliches. Even the wrestlers are stale. When the zombies started eating brains, I was just relieved that I didn't have to try to remember those characters anymore. Even the most developed characters couldn't muster more than mild annoyance from me. I imagine Jones developed them more later in the book, but I just couldn't be bothered to stick around for it.

I assumed, based on the quality of the writing, that this was one of Mr. Jones's earlier works. I was shocked to discover that this came out six years after Demon Theory and the same year as Growing Up Dead in Texas. I don't know what the rest of the story is on this one, but what a dramatic dip in quality.

Let's talk about my recommendation. I recommend that you read something else. Heck, read something else by this author. If you're looking for a zombie fix, may I recommend the truly exceptional South Korean film Train to Busan? As for zombie books, I can't help you there. You came to the wrong reviewer for that.

Content advisory: Name it. Sex, drugs, language, violence, etc., all gratuitous. Not recommended for children, or really anyone else, for that matter.
Profile Image for Matthew Vaughn.
AuthorÌý92 books182 followers
July 4, 2021
Even though the market for the zombie genre is getting over-saturated I’m still a pretty big fan of the living dead. What I mean by big fan is really more toward the visual side, movies, television shows, and video games. It wasn’t until here recently that I started reading books and stories featuring the undead. I used to think that a good zombie apocalypse would be hard to translate to the written word in an entertaining way. I have since realized I was wrong.
This book starts out like a lot of horror movies, with kids out partying and getting into trouble. While out joy riding in one of their dads bakery truck they run over what appears to be a drunk guy. They do the horror movie thing and try to cover it up, because that always works so well. The real meat of the story takes place the next day at a convention center, which is rented to a group called Recipe Days during the day time. In the evening the convention center is rented to pro wrestlers coming to do a show. The two groups over lap when the wrestlers show up early. After intimidating the ladies from Recipe Days they help themselves to some doughnuts from a certain bakery truck. What follows is one extremely entertaining read. Once the action kicks in it does not let up.
SGJ treats us to a unique and interesting Zombie story where the survivors are not your normal one-dimensional horror fare. His characters are very real, intelligent people fighting for their lives. Also, with his zombies he adds some new interesting twists.
Jones is a master storyteller, I have enjoyed everything I’ve read from him quite a bit, and this book was no exception. I have been having trouble reading paper books in a decent amount of time, recently I read e-books because I get through them faster. But I read this as a paper book and it kept me turning the pages and so engrossed in the story that I finished it in about a week. I recommend this book to not only zombie lovers, but anyone who likes action on top of a good story.
Profile Image for Kelsi - Slime and Slashers.
386 reviews248 followers
May 31, 2022
I was really in love with the premise of this book and thought it was so full of potential, but I just personally couldn't get into the story because of the writing style. I did overall enjoy the gore depicted in this book, but I can't rate it higher because I felt confused by the flow of the writing at times. Overall, I'd suggest giving the book a go and judge for yourself. If you like campy and gory horror (which I usually do), you may enjoy Zombie Bake-Off!
Profile Image for Dez Nemec.
977 reviews28 followers
March 15, 2025
Having recently read The Buffalo Hunter Hunter, it's hard to believe this was the same author. Such a weird, fun book.
Profile Image for Holly (The GrimDragon).
1,167 reviews278 followers
July 27, 2021
"He swallows, raises the tip of his sword some, and just in time: the first wrestler blitzes them, kicking the flashlight so it's just spinning in place, strobing the whole room, turning it into a series of snapshots: Chapman hacking at the face of that wrestler, Johnny T. following-up to the neck, and then the rest crowding in on them, so that all they can do is climb up onto the Zamboni, swing at anything that reaches over the hood."

Zombie Bake-Off by Stephen Graham Jones is a campy, entertaining horror novel about an annual baking convention that ends up overrun with professional wrestlers who show up earlier than they were scheduled to.

Zombie wrestlers vs. soccer moms, contaminated donuts, vampires, fart humor, blood & gore, oh my!

Mmm, donuts.

You get a donut with a chopped off finger in it! And you get a donut with gnarly maggots! EVERYONE GETS AN OOZING, BLOODY DONUT!!

Zombie Bake-Off is grimy, crude & bonkers af!

Although not my favorite SGJ, I'll read anything he writes!
Profile Image for Rebecca.
228 reviews
January 9, 2021
Not a bad book actually. Like withThe Only Good Indians, the author talked about things like you should know what they were. Like I should know the layout of the setting etc, but given that it was a bit more generic I didn’t struggle as much. I liked Terry and Xombie from the get-go which is what saved this book for me - in TOGI I didn’t really like any of the characters which is what made it a harder read
Profile Image for Zachary Ashford.
AuthorÌý13 books86 followers
June 4, 2022
Loads of fun. Love how versatile SGJ is. Worlds apart from his recent big-name stuff, but written just as well with memorable characters and a tonne of soul.
Profile Image for Deidra (ShadeTreeReads).
224 reviews44 followers
June 21, 2022
3.5/3.75-4 of 5 stars
This was fun! Why hasn't this been adapted into a movie yet?! Is it that Hollywood is too busy rebooting and remaking stuff we've already seen? I'll wait.
Profile Image for Jon.
301 reviews9 followers
May 22, 2025
Fun, quick read that delivers on what it promises.
Profile Image for Ashley.
457 reviews14 followers
May 31, 2024
4.25 rounded down to 4

Zombie Bake-Off had a simple plot, but it was so silly and fun! When professional wrestlers crash a local baking competition, all hell breaks loose...especially after the wrestlers eat contaminated donuts, changing them into brain-eating zombies.

There was a ton of witty banter, inappropriate jokes, lots of swearing, and tons of blood and gore. The zombies were reminiscent of the old-school Romero zombies that liked eating brains, with a fun little twist. In this version of the zombie, men are the "breeders," and women are the "hunters." All the characters were entertaining; Beatrice was my absolute favorite and the baddest B of them all.

Stephen Graham Jones also tossed in some horror movie references (particularly Alien), which I thought were fun little Easter eggs. I wish there was a little more to the origin of the infection in the donuts, and honestly, I expected it to be a bit gorier than it was... other than that one scene with my girl Beatrice, that actually had me gagging, so kudos to Stephen (iykyk 😅).

If you like:

Inappropriate jokes and cussing
Blood and gore
Professional wrestling
Baked goods
Zombies

...then this is the perfect book for you, and it's under 300 pages.
Profile Image for Frau Blücher.
106 reviews2 followers
January 19, 2020
Any zombie fight is a food fight.


Mit diesem Satz hat Herr Jones knapp und treffend formuliert, worum es in seinem Buch ziemlich nonstop geht: fressen oder gefressen werden, und das im eher ungewöhnlichen Setting einer „Hausfrauenmesse� mit besonderem Schwerpunkt auf süßem Backwerk nach alten Familienrezepten.

In diese kreuzamerikanische Veranstaltung platzt eine verfrüht eintreffende Truppe Wrestler, die am selben Veranstaltungsort am Abend ihre Show gebucht haben. Dummerweise legen diese Herren (und Damen) größten Wert darauf, ihrem schlechten Ruf durch allerlei rüpelhafte Aktivitäten gerecht zu werden, und sorgen dafür, dass niemand die Allzweckhalle verlassen kann, bevor sie ihren „Spaß� hatten.

Mehrere Kartons Donuts, die aus hier nicht näher erläuterbaren Gründen mit einem Zombievirus kontaminiert wurden, sorgen dann für mehr Action, als geplant war. Im Kampf ums Überleben kommt von Wrestlingtechniken bis Hightech-Küchenmaschinen alles den in der Halle Eingeschlossenen verfügbare zum Einsatz, aber ob das reicht?

The grandmother laughs. Mostly at herself. “So you think this is how it is?� she says to him, the mixer at her side like a pistol she can fastdraw. “You think I lived seventy-six years just to be dinner to your kind?�


Mahlzeit! (Ich hab schon mal eine Rezi so begonnen, aber es passt nun mal so schön hierher�) Eigentlich dachte ich, dass Stories aus dem inzwischen arg ausgelutschten Zombie-Genre mich nur noch milde unterhalten können, wenn überhaupt, aber Steven Graham Jones hat es geschafft, mich eines besseren zu belehren. Nicht etwa, weil er hier bahnbrechend neue Ideen oder Konzepte auffahren würde, sondern indem er seine Story schlicht und ergreifend in ein höchst beknacktes Umfeld verfrachtet und dann konsequent den Fuß auf dem Gaspedal parkt.

Man bekommt hier aber nicht nur hahnebüchene Action in dichtem Takt serviert, sondern als Zuckerguss auf dem Gemetzel eine handvoll Protagonisten, die zwar nicht gerade durch ausgefeilte Charakterzeichnung glänzen, aber in dem ganzen Durcheinander doch ausreichend Substanz besitzen, um mit ihnen mitzufiebern. Was mir durchaus zum ein oder anderen „alter Falter�-Moment beim Lesen gereicht hat, muss ich zugeben. Merke: leg dich nie mit Frauen an, die ihre Kinder pünktlich aus der Schule abholen müssen�

Was mir sehr positiv aufgefallen ist: sowohl Prota- als auch Antagonistinnen sind hier tonangebend, ohne dass es aufgezwungen wirkt oder man gar Arnolds große, vor Kraft kaum des Laufens fähige Schwester vorgestellt bekommt. Die Mädels treten mit Geschicklichkeit und Köpfchen Arsch, und das nicht zu knapp!

Von mir bekommen die schleckermäuligen Zombies jedenfalls vier von fünf Donuts, mit extra Zuckerguss!
Profile Image for George Prew.
149 reviews3 followers
December 16, 2024
Wavering between 2 and 3 stars - A real shame.

Stephen Graham Jones is an absolutely brilliant writer, who has written several of my favourite books, including what may well be my favourite novel (Mongrels), novella (Night of the Mannequin), and short story collection (Zombie Sharks With Metal Teeth). This book is not SGJ at his best.

The concept is of course excellent - Zombies, professional wrestlers, and bakers in a battle royale? Fantastic! Pure, schlocky fun, and it's clear that Stephen is having pure, schlocky fun with it, bumping tropes from wrestling (multiple characters are very thinly-veiled WWF characters or tropes) and horror B-movies together, and his skill in plotting and narrative are as clear here as they ever are.

On the other hand, this really feels like something SGJ had to get out of his system - Again, it is fun, and he is clearly having fun, but surprisingly it feels a lot less fun than his more serious stories because it's a lot less kind. Characters, true to B-movies, true to wrestling, are broad archetypes and often quite stupid, which feels jarring given the real humanity and depth of understanding with which SGJ usually writes characters - It feels uncharacteristically and unnecessarily nasty.

And that is the main issue with this book - In leaning so far into B-movie schlock, it loses the humanity which is SGJ's greatest strength, which comes as a surprise, given that the prologue is as good and characteristic of him as any SGJ I've read.

And then there's the other nasty elements - This story really feels like a 90s throwback, which is no bad thing necessarily, but... The throw back comes most in its treatment of homosexuality and disability - It's treatment of both felt very... Friends.

My advice - Read the prologue, smile at the name, maybe flick through, and then read Night of the Mannequins.
Profile Image for Jesse Bullington.
AuthorÌý43 books341 followers
September 14, 2012
Absurdly cool and entertaining. One of the things I most admire about SGJ is that his work manages to be both dependably excellent and wildly unpredictable. This goes for his overall body of work, with one project being totally unlike anything else he's done, but also for the individual works themselves. Take, for example, this monster ballad of semi-pro wrestlers and amateur bake-off participants locked in an arena with an ever-growing horde of zombies. With a premise that gold you know everything is going to be all right even if it follows a by-the-numbers zombie trajectory, but this being a SGJ novel, the action manages to simultaneously hit the sweet spots that a zombie/wrestler/soccer mom showdown promises while also throwing a baker's dozen of insane and insanely touching twists into the squared circle. An aside: when I was growing up, every few Sundays my dad would drive me to the gas station, which was the only shop in town other than the feed store. There we would buy a dozen donuts--the pre-packaged, mass-produced one; nothing fresh at the Warrior's Mark Uni-Mart--and return home to watch pro-wrestling on one of the half-dozen channels we picked up. This book unexpectedly dredged up a lot of great memories, plus, yanno, zombies.
Profile Image for Glasgowgal.
740 reviews2 followers
November 24, 2024
I don't know if it's the author's writing style, or the way Kindle lays out the book, but I found that the storyline could be confusing at times. Where are the characters? Oh, it's another character and another setting? What the what? When you figure out where the characters are in the story, it can get exciting, but many times, I found myself losing interest and checking the page count to see how many pages were remaining until the end. : (
Profile Image for Brian Sammons.
AuthorÌý78 books73 followers
August 25, 2012
Read it and really enjoyed it. Full review coming, but for right now let me just say that if you like your zombies with a side of silly, not to mention with a dash of pro wrestlers, then this is the books for you.

My full review can be read here:
Profile Image for lea.
196 reviews38 followers
November 12, 2022
Zombie Bake-Off was such a silly, fun, gross, gory book! Perfect for spooky season or literally anytime. I really enjoyed the writing and pacing of this one and recommend it if you like horror that doesn't take itself too seriously.
Profile Image for Jerry.
335 reviews33 followers
October 26, 2020
How did this ever get published? It is utter garbage.
Profile Image for Colleen.
467 reviews31 followers
September 19, 2022
*3.5 stars*. This was campy and ridiculously fun!
Profile Image for Caroline.
411 reviews13 followers
February 24, 2025
I was intrigued by the premise of this book and thought it would be a campy, silly zombie romp. But I was so incredibly put off by the author's writing that I basically hated everything about it. The way characters have conversations and the way the conversations are formatted, is all so choppy that at times it was hard to follow what they were even talking about anymore. There was never any rhythm or flow to the story which made it really hard to enjoy. All the characters were basically terrible people which meant I didn't care if anyone died and for a short book, there were about a dozen times that the story should have been over and it was like someone told the author he had to write another 20 pages. It became repetitive and a slog to finish.
Profile Image for Melissa Leitner.
674 reviews10 followers
February 26, 2025
It's called Zombie Bake Off and features what are essentially WWE wrestlers. What more do you really need in a book? It is every B (or C) zombie movie combined featuring different types of zombies which I thought was a fantastic decision by SGJ to include. Does it have the best character depth I have ever read, not even in the slightest. But that is not what I read this book for. I read this book for some gross out horror featuring zombies and that is what I got. It is fun from start to finish, but once the zombies start popping up, I did not want to put this little novel down. Action-packed and short, this one was easily consumable in just a few sittings. Highly recommend for anyone looking for a fun time but not much more than that.
Profile Image for Michelle Kenneth - PerfectionistWannabe.com.
449 reviews9 followers
November 17, 2024
Of all the horror genres, I hate zombies.

But this book may be my new favorite SGJ book.

The elements he put into this book made it weird, but funny. Nasty donuts, soccer moms, a bake-off, professional wrestlers, and even how each zombie generation comes into being is crazy, but it all made for a really great zombie book.

And I hate zombies. I really do.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 174 reviews

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