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Zombie Rules #1
Zombie Rules
Book one of the Zombie Rules Zach Gunderson, a skinny sixteen-year-old High School sophomore, is caught up in a worldwide infection which turns its victims into violent zombies. Together with his friends, Zach learns to survive in a world turned upside down. In addition to the violent zombies, there are the lawless survivors which his group must contend against as well.
263 pages, Kindle Edition
First published August 28, 2014
395 people are currently reading
661 people want to read
About the author
David Achord
23books147followersAfter being honorably discharged as a Sergeant in the United States Army, David Achord found his true calling in law enforcement. His twenty-five year career included stints with the Rutherford County Sheriff's Department and the Metropolitan Nashville Police Department. A lifelong Tennessee native, he is a graduate of Middle Tennessee State University and Cumberland University.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 182 reviews
January 9, 2016
I really tried to finish this but I was starting to get headaches from rolling my eyes so much. I got about 60% through and I just hated it too much, I can't even remember the last time I didn't follow through on completing a book, but this one was so bad I got my money back from Audible.
The writing was horribly stiff and awkward. The author has some bias against contractions and it sounded absolutely awful when read aloud. There were lots of grammar mistakes and I got the impression it was written with a thesaurus in hand so that it would sound "smarter"--I don't think someone sounds more intelligent when they use "big words" where simple ones suffice. I love words, I adore language, I have a degree in English, but this writing was so awkward I found it unbearable to listen to.
ZOMBIE RULES was full of negative depictions of women and people of color, and I quickly grew to loathe the protagonist. Many reviewers have mentioned that Zach's transformation into a know-it-all apocalyptic hero was unrealistic and I agree. The combination of the narrator's voice and the endless gross descriptions (lots of farts, dogs shitting and sniffing asses, every woman's boobs, etc.) made me finally rip off my headphones in disgust, and I'm not a prude, it was just unnecessary and done so badly.
The writing was horribly stiff and awkward. The author has some bias against contractions and it sounded absolutely awful when read aloud. There were lots of grammar mistakes and I got the impression it was written with a thesaurus in hand so that it would sound "smarter"--I don't think someone sounds more intelligent when they use "big words" where simple ones suffice. I love words, I adore language, I have a degree in English, but this writing was so awkward I found it unbearable to listen to.
ZOMBIE RULES was full of negative depictions of women and people of color, and I quickly grew to loathe the protagonist. Many reviewers have mentioned that Zach's transformation into a know-it-all apocalyptic hero was unrealistic and I agree. The combination of the narrator's voice and the endless gross descriptions (lots of farts, dogs shitting and sniffing asses, every woman's boobs, etc.) made me finally rip off my headphones in disgust, and I'm not a prude, it was just unnecessary and done so badly.
January 25, 2018
If you’re a racist, misogynist prepper who loves to read subpar fiction by the glow of a backwoods militia campfire, this is your book.
June 24, 2015
Childish crap
Not only was this not a good zombie book, but it was completely misogynistic. The author clearly hates women and used a zombie book to manifest his childish boy dreams of being a hero, getting revenge on bullies, and making the women who've rejected him pay by making horrid female characters who are dumb and unable to care for themselves. A mindless read.
Not only was this not a good zombie book, but it was completely misogynistic. The author clearly hates women and used a zombie book to manifest his childish boy dreams of being a hero, getting revenge on bullies, and making the women who've rejected him pay by making horrid female characters who are dumb and unable to care for themselves. A mindless read.
December 7, 2018
Okay I just can't finish this. The amount of toxic masculinity in this book is astounding. The constant mention of farting crapping, and staring at women's boobs is just utterly ridiculous even for a horny teenage boy.
I am so forgiving of this genre and their male BS in general but this one jumped the shark when the male author goes into a diatribe of how horny the female character is because she saw her boyfriend's penis. I've never in my life met a woman attracted to a man because of how his penis looks.
Are books like this the reason women receive junk shots from the men they are dating?
Okay aside from the above the lead kid is absolutely unbelievable as a zombie survivalist. Also where are all the zombies? I mean unless he was in seriously backwater Montana there's gotta be more walking dead. Ugh.
Don't bother with this one. Just move along.
I am so forgiving of this genre and their male BS in general but this one jumped the shark when the male author goes into a diatribe of how horny the female character is because she saw her boyfriend's penis. I've never in my life met a woman attracted to a man because of how his penis looks.
Are books like this the reason women receive junk shots from the men they are dating?
Okay aside from the above the lead kid is absolutely unbelievable as a zombie survivalist. Also where are all the zombies? I mean unless he was in seriously backwater Montana there's gotta be more walking dead. Ugh.
Don't bother with this one. Just move along.
October 28, 2014
I tried and gave up half way through the book.
I love books about zombies but the most important thing in these kind off books is humanity for me, the way people have to adjust to their new life, the way they treat other people, the new way to live your life.
Zach wasn't bad guy he didn't deserved so much pain in his young life, but he became a killer before the zombies turned.
This book was obviously written by a man, is screamed manly on every page.
Zack did what he had to do to stay in life with his friend Rick. I couldn't connect to the characters this book was not for me.
I love books about zombies but the most important thing in these kind off books is humanity for me, the way people have to adjust to their new life, the way they treat other people, the new way to live your life.
Zach wasn't bad guy he didn't deserved so much pain in his young life, but he became a killer before the zombies turned.
This book was obviously written by a man, is screamed manly on every page.
Zack did what he had to do to stay in life with his friend Rick. I couldn't connect to the characters this book was not for me.
January 19, 2021
Mid-state Tennessee is my adopted home, and it is easy to see that it is Mr. Achord's home also. This is your typical zombie fare. It was a good read but a forgettable sort of story. The characters were well developed if a little unbelievable. Not the prepper part. I once lived near to a man who when he built his new house had a walk-in gun safe built in his basement bigger than my bedroom. And another neighbor who had solar panels installed in their "Tornado shelter." You know the tornado shelter that was 1500 square feet with a fully working bathroom and dug into the side of a hill. (true story.)
4 stars for the setting (Middle TN)
2 stars for the story itself
Yes I will be reading the next book in the set. My library has the whole series so might as well.
4 stars for the setting (Middle TN)
2 stars for the story itself
Yes I will be reading the next book in the set. My library has the whole series so might as well.
March 21, 2015
How to start with this one? Ok, take a Mary Stu zompocalypse fanfic with a hefty dose of Agenda 21 Doomsday Prepper mythos, add a streak of Turner Diaries. Voila! This book. You can't detract from one thing. David Achord can craft an interesting yarn. It's a great standard zombie survival story where basic common sense and paranoid prepper actions save our young hero Zach in the beginning. Everyone else is not so lucky. Zach has the sort of broad range of skill and ability you usually find in a thinly veiled alter ego for the author-think Elminister and Ed Greenwood, or nearly every modern Doctor Who and Steve Moffat. It's not as bad as some, but it is there.
Now, I liked the book, but I noticed certain things in the writing that started to bother me.
Women:
Boy, we are just traitorous bitches, aren't we? Breaking hearts, using our bodies to cause pain and suffering without thought for anyone else but ourselves. There's only 2 types of women in this world, tramps and females who learn from the suffering of being whory mctrampsalot and become good, virtuous, arms-bearing shooting partners. OOooooK.
Biracial:
Those durned biracial males are a tricksey lot. So sneaky and clever-but not as clever as you, Zach. They only seem clever to those trampy females who think riding their jock is a path to greatness. So dangerous, so � biracial. Plus, weed. See below.
Black men (with maybe a woman):
When we show up, we are drug dealers, who smoke tons of weed. Even during an apocalypse with things running about to kill us, we're lighting up. I'd post the statistics of drug use in America, but why bother? Blacks smoke weed and try to rape white boys. The women are slow, mean and of course, toked up on weed. Frigging apocalypse, but black people have weed, but no plan. You're welcome for the farming, the okra, the peanut, Zach. The one pair of decent folk who are black are safely old and eager to be helped by their much better prepared country neighbors who smartly have guns, engineering & farming skills. YAY, for being saved because you're nice and ran the Home Depot!
It's called unconscious bias and the book is rife with it. The military is bad, m'kay. Women lead you to perdition, unless they are religious. If you can stomach it, this is a good book. It gives you some reading pleasure and frankly, I'd like to read more of the series, if only to see if Achord develops his skills somewhat.
But, YMMV.
Bottom line, this is hardly uncommon. If you've read any Lovecraft and adored it, congratulations on loving the works of a virulent anti-semite and racist. Picasso was a fabulous artist and a disgusting misogynist. What you create has to be free from the artist, but it doesn't mean the artist's views don't influence the work.
Now, I liked the book, but I noticed certain things in the writing that started to bother me.
Women:
Boy, we are just traitorous bitches, aren't we? Breaking hearts, using our bodies to cause pain and suffering without thought for anyone else but ourselves. There's only 2 types of women in this world, tramps and females who learn from the suffering of being whory mctrampsalot and become good, virtuous, arms-bearing shooting partners. OOooooK.
Biracial:
Those durned biracial males are a tricksey lot. So sneaky and clever-but not as clever as you, Zach. They only seem clever to those trampy females who think riding their jock is a path to greatness. So dangerous, so � biracial. Plus, weed. See below.
Black men (with maybe a woman):
When we show up, we are drug dealers, who smoke tons of weed. Even during an apocalypse with things running about to kill us, we're lighting up. I'd post the statistics of drug use in America, but why bother? Blacks smoke weed and try to rape white boys. The women are slow, mean and of course, toked up on weed. Frigging apocalypse, but black people have weed, but no plan. You're welcome for the farming, the okra, the peanut, Zach. The one pair of decent folk who are black are safely old and eager to be helped by their much better prepared country neighbors who smartly have guns, engineering & farming skills. YAY, for being saved because you're nice and ran the Home Depot!
It's called unconscious bias and the book is rife with it. The military is bad, m'kay. Women lead you to perdition, unless they are religious. If you can stomach it, this is a good book. It gives you some reading pleasure and frankly, I'd like to read more of the series, if only to see if Achord develops his skills somewhat.
But, YMMV.
Bottom line, this is hardly uncommon. If you've read any Lovecraft and adored it, congratulations on loving the works of a virulent anti-semite and racist. Picasso was a fabulous artist and a disgusting misogynist. What you create has to be free from the artist, but it doesn't mean the artist's views don't influence the work.
February 17, 2015
I have read MANY zombie tales. This has been one of my favorites. Looking forward to reading more from this author.
February 21, 2017
I like this kind of zombie action, because the hero is proactive instead of reactive. He's planning things out. I see a lot of reviews complaining about misogynistic writing. I won't dispute that. I even enjoyed it. :)
For me, to use the old cliche, the pages turned themselves. I've already picked up and started the second book in the series.
For me, to use the old cliche, the pages turned themselves. I've already picked up and started the second book in the series.
July 5, 2020
Easy book to get into. This is the first book of many in a series. This book wasn’t completely horrible but it wasnt something I would write home about either. Zak and his friend Rick are living on a farm when people mysteriously come down with a fever and turn into zombies. They meet other people on their journey off the farm to see if others have survived. Of course like in any zombie movie/book you have: the crime sort of people (thieves, druggies, rapists). And then you have those that are willing to be civil and trade to help each other. This book felt like it was setting up a foundation for the 2nd book. As Zak learns about the zombies he writes them somewhere public so others can survive aka Zombie Rules. It has peeked my interest to read the second book in the series. One thing I wish the author didn’t do was make the lead character a genius high school student. It was a little off putting at first then I got use to the character.
July 11, 2022
Why are so many zombie novels written like a horny 13 year old with homophobia got drunk and started writing. "Wouldn't it be cool if ..."
The real shame is how many people not only accept this but view these masterworks of pubescent apocalyptic hogwash as good storytelling.
Raise the bar people! If a drunk 13 year old could have written this story it's not good writing. And worse than that it is not even entertaining.
Still true.
7/2022
The real shame is how many people not only accept this but view these masterworks of pubescent apocalyptic hogwash as good storytelling.
Raise the bar people! If a drunk 13 year old could have written this story it's not good writing. And worse than that it is not even entertaining.
Still true.
7/2022
November 18, 2017
Teenage zombie porn. The teenage protagonist is a modern superhero with genius fantasies. At 16 he is wiser and more mature than anyone older than him and he has the experience of a lifetime without having lived that long. Who the hell wrote this book? A 12 year old? The interactions he has with the other characters are childish and stunted. No real genuine dialogue. YES, the book takes place during a Zombie apocalypse, but none of the actual human interactions he has with the other characters seems to be written by someone who has actually talked to other people.
November 20, 2014
How do I phrase this.
Seemingly major inconsistencies, on top of that when did a 16yr old with his background become more seemingly competent that a Green Beret? Not only does he seem to understand everything but he seems to have the life experience to put that knowledge to practical applications.
Seemingly major inconsistencies, on top of that when did a 16yr old with his background become more seemingly competent that a Green Beret? Not only does he seem to understand everything but he seems to have the life experience to put that knowledge to practical applications.
March 10, 2015
ABR's full audiobook review and many others can be found at .
If you know anything about me an my tastes in audiobooks. You know that I love new zombie stories, especially from authors I know nothing about. So, naturally, I jumped at the chance to listen to Zombie Rules.
I also find it very difficult to go into an known zombie story with expectations. I am going to do my best to leave those by the wayside. So I can really get into the story and not judge it versus all the other stories I have heard already.
Zombie Rules starts off before the zombie apocalypse starts. Painting a vivid picture of who the survivors will be and how they got to where they are. Then people everywhere start getting sick. I know that this is a pretty typical beginning to the apocalypse and I am not even sure how many other directions you could successfully go in.
We end up with Rick, a Vietnam vet who just happens to be a prepper. He takes this kid Zach under his wing and teaches him everything he knows about survival, security, guns, farming, all the essential prepper skills. From here begins the madness, adventure, heartache, love, survival and friendship.
Zach is a very smart kid who starts to notice that the zombies exist and die by particular rules. I won’t list them here but this knowledge keeps him and is group alive and even surprises the military folks they run across.
Zombie Rules is pretty tame when it comes to violence and gore. Where David Achord was really successful was with the characters. Just enough development to get you interested in their well being, but not so much that you get board with it. There were points where I got very upset when the story went certain ways, but I won’t tell you what.
I am looking forward to the next book in the series and already have it queued up for a listen.
This was my first time listening to Graham Halstead. I have to say that he was able to bring a youthful voice to this tale. Great characterizations and a charge ahead pace that I think most people would be very happy with. I am looking forward to more performances by Halstead.
Audiobook provided for review by the publisher.
If you know anything about me an my tastes in audiobooks. You know that I love new zombie stories, especially from authors I know nothing about. So, naturally, I jumped at the chance to listen to Zombie Rules.
I also find it very difficult to go into an known zombie story with expectations. I am going to do my best to leave those by the wayside. So I can really get into the story and not judge it versus all the other stories I have heard already.
Zombie Rules starts off before the zombie apocalypse starts. Painting a vivid picture of who the survivors will be and how they got to where they are. Then people everywhere start getting sick. I know that this is a pretty typical beginning to the apocalypse and I am not even sure how many other directions you could successfully go in.
We end up with Rick, a Vietnam vet who just happens to be a prepper. He takes this kid Zach under his wing and teaches him everything he knows about survival, security, guns, farming, all the essential prepper skills. From here begins the madness, adventure, heartache, love, survival and friendship.
Zach is a very smart kid who starts to notice that the zombies exist and die by particular rules. I won’t list them here but this knowledge keeps him and is group alive and even surprises the military folks they run across.
Zombie Rules is pretty tame when it comes to violence and gore. Where David Achord was really successful was with the characters. Just enough development to get you interested in their well being, but not so much that you get board with it. There were points where I got very upset when the story went certain ways, but I won’t tell you what.
I am looking forward to the next book in the series and already have it queued up for a listen.
This was my first time listening to Graham Halstead. I have to say that he was able to bring a youthful voice to this tale. Great characterizations and a charge ahead pace that I think most people would be very happy with. I am looking forward to more performances by Halstead.
Audiobook provided for review by the publisher.
January 16, 2015
Promising first book, where young Zach loses the rest of his family AND and respect his peers might have had for him before the world falls apart for everyone.
Then he hunkers down with an old Vietnam vet, and learns how to cope with the changed world.
Then the strange choices start... a 16 year old boy goes from being a bullied wimp to a seasoned Marine in just a few weeks. Everything just comes together to easily, and what could have been a fresh take on the genre just turns into the same as the rest...
Then he hunkers down with an old Vietnam vet, and learns how to cope with the changed world.
Then the strange choices start... a 16 year old boy goes from being a bullied wimp to a seasoned Marine in just a few weeks. Everything just comes together to easily, and what could have been a fresh take on the genre just turns into the same as the rest...
October 24, 2014
Too much profanity!
Another author under the illusion that a story can't be good without vulgar and profane language. Ruined what might have otherwise been a good story.
Another author under the illusion that a story can't be good without vulgar and profane language. Ruined what might have otherwise been a good story.
February 25, 2020
Imagine being trapped in your car with your family. You are out of fuel and thousands of zombies creep around, slowly engulfing your car. After two whole days your terrified kids keep crying from hunger and thirst.
You know your sacrifice could be their only chance. You will open the door and try to fight the horde for a precious minute that can, maybe, allow your family to exit and run in the opposite direction. Your wife cries for a whole hour before finally accepting your decision.
She says she loves you and promise you to take care of your kids and always honor your memory as the hero you truly are.
You kiss your kids and your wife and say a little pray.
After opening the door you get to push some of the first zombies. You know you are doomed but you have to resist. Every second counts.
Zombies are weaker than you thought but their sheer numbers are decisive.
While you swing your extinguisher at their heads some of the fallen ones manage to bite your legs.
You fall.
At least a dozen mouths tear your body up.
The pain is unbearable.
You see what seems to be your intestines being pushed away from your body.
But you know for as long as you struggle your family will have a chance.
Feeling you are about to die you manage to look at the car.
Zombies easily caught your kids and wife and are already devouring them right in front of your eyes.
That.
That would be better than reading this book.
You know your sacrifice could be their only chance. You will open the door and try to fight the horde for a precious minute that can, maybe, allow your family to exit and run in the opposite direction. Your wife cries for a whole hour before finally accepting your decision.
She says she loves you and promise you to take care of your kids and always honor your memory as the hero you truly are.
You kiss your kids and your wife and say a little pray.
After opening the door you get to push some of the first zombies. You know you are doomed but you have to resist. Every second counts.
Zombies are weaker than you thought but their sheer numbers are decisive.
While you swing your extinguisher at their heads some of the fallen ones manage to bite your legs.
You fall.
At least a dozen mouths tear your body up.
The pain is unbearable.
You see what seems to be your intestines being pushed away from your body.
But you know for as long as you struggle your family will have a chance.
Feeling you are about to die you manage to look at the car.
Zombies easily caught your kids and wife and are already devouring them right in front of your eyes.
That.
That would be better than reading this book.
March 3, 2018
Ok effort.
There's some pretty significant problems with this novel, but it's definitely readable. The main character is nearly an insufferable jackass, that seems to get led around by his tent pole pretty much exclusively. He's always the smartest guy in the room, but only because he's apparently surrounded himself by people dumber than a bag of glass hammers. It's like the author fleshed out the main character, and the surrounding characters are just...there. When we meet Zach the first time (at 16) he acts pretty much like a dumb ass kid. Makes sense. As we go further, he morphs just months later, into a 40 year old man in temperament and skill. That's...not how it works.
Further, he never really faces any kind of adversity. Everything works pretty much the way he wants, and even when it doesn't he's the smartest most skilled guy around, so he's fine.
Finally, his portrayal of women is pretty weird, to say the least. They're either conniving and bitchy, trashy, or nearly completely subservient to his will. There's no real equal footing.
I'm not going to buy the sequel. It was readable, but not particularly good.
There's some pretty significant problems with this novel, but it's definitely readable. The main character is nearly an insufferable jackass, that seems to get led around by his tent pole pretty much exclusively. He's always the smartest guy in the room, but only because he's apparently surrounded himself by people dumber than a bag of glass hammers. It's like the author fleshed out the main character, and the surrounding characters are just...there. When we meet Zach the first time (at 16) he acts pretty much like a dumb ass kid. Makes sense. As we go further, he morphs just months later, into a 40 year old man in temperament and skill. That's...not how it works.
Further, he never really faces any kind of adversity. Everything works pretty much the way he wants, and even when it doesn't he's the smartest most skilled guy around, so he's fine.
Finally, his portrayal of women is pretty weird, to say the least. They're either conniving and bitchy, trashy, or nearly completely subservient to his will. There's no real equal footing.
I'm not going to buy the sequel. It was readable, but not particularly good.
October 1, 2018
Underdeveloped and incredibly sexist. Seems the author is living out a fantasy in which he is a genius, and everyone else is horribly incompetent. Little back story to explain how the 16 yr old protagonist has so much knowledge about... well, everything. He conveniently has a photographic memory and "likes to read," and is therefore an expert on all things. This might have played better in an older character with more life experience. The author presents his "zombie rules" as if they revelations: as if no one else could have figured out you need to shoot them in the head. Protagonist also kills a man (not a zombie) early on in the story, but this act seems to have no effect on him or anyone else. The female characters are one dimensional and unilaterally helpless, evil, lazy, and scheming. The protagonist only thinks about women in terms of sex and comments in unnecessary and graphic detail on their bodies. Overall, this story lacks the depth and reflection present in many other good zombie books. I was truly surprised to see an overall rating around 4 stars. I was also genuinely surprised to learn that the author, David Achord, is not a teenage boy but a grown man.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
December 28, 2017
2.5. Would be 3 stars if the author wasn’t quite so misogynistic (that, or he has never met a woman). I may read the next, to see if it gets better. The story is good, the writing fine, although some of the dialogue is eye-roll worthy and the word “opined� was used far too many times.
Oh, and the movie Zombieland feels ripped off with Z’s rules.
Oh, and the movie Zombieland feels ripped off with Z’s rules.
December 28, 2014
Zombie reads
This is actually very well written novel. I liked the story, the flow, and the depth of the characters. I have already grabbed the second book in the series, with some luck it will be as good.
This is actually very well written novel. I liked the story, the flow, and the depth of the characters. I have already grabbed the second book in the series, with some luck it will be as good.
December 11, 2014
That ending. Cliffhanger much?!
Oh, i will definitely read book 2 ;-)
Oh, i will definitely read book 2 ;-)
November 8, 2018
DNF. THIS BOOK IS AWFUL.
April 24, 2020
An ok sort of read- for a self published first book. I can see potential.
July 24, 2023
2.5 stars.
Good for a rainy night in, but there was a lot to be desired. An editor was needed.
Good for a rainy night in, but there was a lot to be desired. An editor was needed.
October 6, 2023
Stuck in a world full of zombies and it's always the people you have to watch out for. Why is it that more of the worst type of people always seem to survive the first wave? I mean I know the answer but dang.
A fun read where we actually have people who were thinking things through when the zombie apocalypse began and prepared for their survival. Oh, of course that brings it's own set of difficulties. Mostly dealing with the people who decide they'll just take what you have.
Enjoyable characters that have flaws, and know they have them, and do their best to deal with them in a constructive ways...Or at least some of them do. Zach and his small group have peaked my interest and I want to know where things are going to go from here.
A fun read where we actually have people who were thinking things through when the zombie apocalypse began and prepared for their survival. Oh, of course that brings it's own set of difficulties. Mostly dealing with the people who decide they'll just take what you have.
Enjoyable characters that have flaws, and know they have them, and do their best to deal with them in a constructive ways...Or at least some of them do. Zach and his small group have peaked my interest and I want to know where things are going to go from here.
February 12, 2020
A little Long winded for my liking but everything tied together nicely. The ending left room for more conflicts and the sequels that follow. Will continue this series.
August 24, 2024
Fantastic start to a Zombie series! Can't wait to read the rest 🙌🏻
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
February 9, 2021
I borrowed this audiobook and not even 5 minutes into the book there was a child rape scene.It was unnecessary,had no warning and was not even central to the nonexistent plot at that time.I am disgusted by this lazy writing and use of sexual abuse of a child as a plot device.
December 1, 2021
David Achord took seven viagra pills, smoked a bunch of weed then sat down at his computer and wrote out his sex filled hero fantasies (with zombies of course).
He then went back and decided that a little boy being sodomised by adults in front of the main protagonist was the perfect gritty beginning to a post apocalyptic novel.
Then detailed a fun threesome between literal children (cause that would definitely happen).
He then went back and decided that a little boy being sodomised by adults in front of the main protagonist was the perfect gritty beginning to a post apocalyptic novel.
Then detailed a fun threesome between literal children (cause that would definitely happen).
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
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