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A Perfect Union of Contrary Things

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New York Times Bestseller A Perfect Union of Contrary Things is the authorized biography of musician and vintner Maynard James Keenan. Co-author Sarah Jensen's 30-year friendship with Keenan gives her unique insight into his history and career trajectory. The book traces Keenan's journey from his Midwest childhood to his years in the Army to his time in art school, from his stint at a Boston pet shop to his place in the international spotlight and his influence on contemporary music and regional winemaking. A comprehensive portrayal of a versatile and dedicated artist, A Perfect Union of Contrary Things pays homage to the people and places that shaped the man and his art.

Until now, Maynard's fans have had access to only an abridged version of his story. A Perfect Union of Contrary Things presents the outtakes, the scenes of disappointment and triumph, and the events that led him to take one step after the next, to change direction, to explore sometimes surprising opportunities. Included are sidebars in his own words, often humorous anecdotes that illuminate the narrative, as well as commentary by his family members, friends, instructors, and industry colleagues. The book also features a foreword by Alex Grey, an American visionary artist and longtime friend of Keenan. Accompanying the text are photos of Keenan from childhood to the present.

Maynard's story is a metaphor for the reader's own evolution and an encouragement to follow one's dreams, hold fast to individual integrity, and work ceaselessly to fulfill our creative potential.

272 pages, Hardcover

First published October 1, 2016

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About the author

Sarah Jensen

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5 stars
1,144 (33%)
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 362 reviews
Profile Image for Sonstepaul.
266 reviews
December 29, 2016
If you make the same mistake I did and approach this book as a fan of MJK the musician, you'll be tremendously disappointed. The composition of a Tool album is given a few sparse lines. APC and Puscifer just a bit more. Pages and pages dedicated to why he moved certain places, to wine, to pet store displays.

It's an interesting look at an artist, but in a hands-off, worshipful manner. He can do no wrong from the writer's perspective, and everything is delivered carefully and from afar.

It's about the man--though barely--and to some extent his artistry--but carefully--and not near enough about the reason we're interested in reading his bio.

Disappointing.
Profile Image for Keeley.
55 reviews33 followers
January 2, 2017
Midway through this book, I came here to read some reviews, out of curiosity. It is surprising to me, and yet not really, that I saw complaints that the man in the book wasn't "fascinating", that prose was " meandering and disjointed", that it appeared to only highlight the positives of his life. We must have read a different book. One of the things that drew me to Tool as a young teenager, was the *intelligence* of the music. I value intelligence above all things, and when I hear a band and one of the first things mentioned is a clear homage to Jung and shadow work, I pay attention. I have been privileged to know a handful of insanely talented people, and I was reminded of how much they meant not only as their art, but as the people behind the art. This book only confirmed my perception of Maynard as I supposed he would be as the person behind the art. If you didn't find his life journey fascinating, with everything he learned and experienced and created, then I have no idea what could possibly be viewed as fascinating by you. Perhaps you have not yet felt such a movement of personal journey yourself yet, but it could still happen. I appreciated the style of writing; outside of some poetic wording here and there, I found this to be a nicely minimalist approach. There is a time and place for lush minute over-detailing of people, places and things (Robert Jordan I'm looking at you), but I would not have enjoyed such here. I think the writing style complimented Maynard's story perfectly. I thoroughly enjoyed the insight into his many pursuits and passions. What a person finds interest in often says much about that person. As far as only positives, you only feel this way because no hardship was wallowed in or dwelled upon or whined about, instead it was approached with the intentional purpose of finding a way to learn and grow from the experience so that there could be a positive propulsion forward. This is a great example to set, as we could all benefit from more positive perceptions. I give this book 5 stars because it is exactly what it said it would be, a guided biography. I'm not going to rank a book on what it could be, as everything in life could always be better. I'm going to rank it as what it is. I also appreciate the fact that Maynard shared this journey of his with us, because he didn't have to. He doesn't owe any of us anything. Being extremely exacting when it comes to reviewing books is illogical when applied to auto- and semi-auto biographies, in my opinion, because you are essentially attempting to buoy or negate someone's life experience, which is all sorts of wrong. Anyway, I'm off to read Little, Big now, and I'm surprisingly a little more optimistic about the coming year.
Profile Image for Kym.
37 reviews5 followers
November 22, 2016
Unless you're a huge fan of MJK, this book is boring and hard to read. The writing is meandering and disjointed. MJK is man who is pulled in many directions and succeeds at everything he does without conflict. There is nothing fascinating about the man in this book however fascinating his lyrics are. I started skimming halfway through and chose to finish by only reading his quotes.
Profile Image for Tanya.
559 reviews330 followers
November 13, 2020
Maynard has always been a very private person who’s shied away from the limelight (literally—he sings in a dark corner at the back of the stage), so the fact that he agreed to tell his life story had me both intrigued and dubious. The memoir follows his life from child, to student, to soldier, to rockstar, to vintner, but I often had the feeling that the book came up against the limits of what he’s willing to share with the public.

This is not your typical rock star (auto) biography. MJK only provides some quotes interspersed throughout, while the bulk of it is written in the third person by Sarah Jensen, whose writing style is very fluffy and flowery—in the beginning I often had to remind myself what I was reading, as it comes across almost like a fictional narrative. The writing is somewhat distant and careful (as I said, I think there isn’t all that much to say about the things Maynard is willing to publish), yet often worshipful, which is where the fact that Sarah Jensen is an old and close friend shines through.

Another caveat: If you approach this as a fan of Maynard the musician, and only want tales of sex, drugs, and rock’n’roll, you’ll be disappointed—this is about Maynard the very introspective and sometimes struggling human being, and the choices he made along the path of his life that eventually led him, among other things, to being a member of several successful bands. It’s about the things that shaped him as a person, and subsequently his art; but Tool isn’t even mentioned until well over half-way through, and if that’s what you came for, you’ll definitely be underwhelmed by the lack of (new) information.

In the first part, we learn about his family’s background and his childhood in the Midwest, his athletic achievements in high school, and his army service, where, given the opportunity to attend the Military Academy, he dropped out to pursue art school instead. The second half of the book is more vivid and engaging, and concerns his fear of not fulfilling his potential as he dabbled in different jobs and hobbies, and finally his rise to musical legend status (and a pretty fast rise it was—Tool got a record deal after playing all of four live shows) and successful winemaker.

If you don’t go in expecting to have Maynard’s inner life and secrets laid bare for your consumption (which, if you know anything about the man, you would not), this will provide an enjoyable insight into the life of a driven individual with an insane amount of determination, passion, creativity, and above all, interests and talent. I’ve learned some new things, and it has succeeded in increasing my respect and understanding for his art.
Profile Image for Sam.
57 reviews6 followers
December 26, 2016
This book would have been better off if it were less tale and more interview. In fact, I felt like the only times I actually got something valuable from the book was when the author quoted Maynard himself. This truly is a passed opportunity on making this one long interview that goes deep.

As far as the writing goes, well. The style is readable but boring. I can probably best compare it with a stale piece of bread trying to soak up delicious gravy. The gravy tastes still good but the overall pleasantness of the bite loses its appeal and potential.

Best thing about the book:
Getting to know Maynard better and understanding each and every move he makes has a certain purpose.

Worst thing about the book:
Oh the glorification. It's super annoying, you feel like you're reading a praise about the saviour Christ rather than a tale about a flawed and sometimes struggeling human being.

I wish the book included more that made you realize "Oh, Maynard is just a normal guy with insane determination and creativity" rather than stating how every idea he has is a gem stone ready to be cut and polished. Because I don't believe that there haven't ever been things he's scrapped or failed at.

2.3/5.
AuthorÌý2 books19 followers
December 14, 2016
It's - not great. The writer is clearly good, but she's also very clearly a VERY CLOSE FRIEND of MJK and it shows. This idea probably needed a Rolling Stone-type journalist with no scruples and all access. I think the book comes up against (often) the limits of what MJK is willing to talk about/publish, and the stuff that he IS willing to talk about just isn't very interesting.

Bit of a let down.
Profile Image for Deb Omnivorous Reader.
1,908 reviews157 followers
June 11, 2023
This was a well written, well paced and very interesting book about Maynard James Keenan, the mind behind the amazing band TOOL, the figure who conceived of the ensemble Puscifer and several other bands. An intesly private person I was looking forward to learning more about the man behind so much revolutionary music and this book certainly met this expectation.

We learn a little about Maynard's family and their backstory, his early years in a small American town, sporting victories at high school, post graduation army service followed by art school. The voice in this part of the story is pleasant, if a little distant, and I suspect this is the part in which author Sarah Jensen had a larger part with only occasional interventions by Maynard.

The latter part of the book, with the frustrations of not fulfilling his potential, followed by the slow rise of music as his lodestar, the involvement in several bands, then finally Tool and the story of that journey. This part of the book feels a lot more vivid and much more intriguing, there is an urgency and a clarity to the events that is probably a reflection of how our present seems more real that our past. This section of the book feels like it has a lot more Maynard in it that the earlier sections, though, again, it could just be that these experiences are fresher and of course this was the part I was most interested in as well.

Literary style; as I do not read that many Biographies or Autobiographies I don't have a lot to compare them with. This book is a bit of both, I think the earlier voice, which I attribute to Sarah is quieter and less of the 'self' of the author intrudes on the story than has been the case in other Biographies I have read. This, I think, is a very good thing. The early part had one thing I really did not love,the assumption that the whole world is as familiar with rural America as the author. A lot of the time places, items, casual references completely lost me and I had no idea what they were talking about (Curlee trousers? MRE pouch?). So a couple of times I googled and having to google a term while reading is not ideal, eventually I just shrugged them off and kept going.

As the book progressed though, this happened less, the shuffling from Biography to Autobiography became more common (very appropriate to Maynard, who has never found a classification he can't bend or a label he cannot redesign), and as that occurred the writing became much more vibrant as well. The direct quotes from Maynard, peppered throughout the book, improved the flow of the story, rather than interrupting it and the introspection and spiritual influences that make his music so very outstanding in the heavier genera of music became a stronger feature of the books narrative.

In the very final part of the book we hear about how Maynard came to start his vineyard and become a winemaker. I'll confess, I thought it was a bit of a shitck when I heard about it too, I knew the wines would be good because pretty much anything that Maynard is involved in is very polished. However, I turned down a wine tasting because I did not realise how fully into it and how very committed to this chapter of his life in Arizona he had become.

All in all a quite brilliant book that has increased my already high respect for an extraordinary individual. It is very inspiring to read about a person who has gone from being a bit lost and aimless to someone who has metamorphosised his passions, thoughts and feelings so very impressively.

Another great thing is to see someone who was never anything but outside the norm succeed in life while staying true to their sense of self, their vision and their identity without conforming themselves to the nebulous 'norm' we are meant to fit in with. The success in music, wine and life is inspirational (and there is a little envy in there, of course) but the road that it took to get to that success is the part that was fascinating to read about and showed quite clearly why this success is richly deserved.

It would be four and a half stars, if GR allowed this, based on the slow start.

Many thanks to Bec for lending it to me.
Profile Image for Martin Cieszewski.
6 reviews
February 7, 2017
I wish I had not read this book.

I think many people leaving reviews are saying similar things to what I'm about to say. The book writing style is boring, it has little to no info on Tool, lots of bragging about how great he is - nothing negative and he's really not that interesting.

20 years ago when I was listening to Tool I was so awed by the mystery behind all the writing, the man who wrote those words and the power behind some of most liberating music I've ever heard. I wish he realized that people wanted to know more about him because of the music he made with Tool. The book was like reading a biography about Michael Jordan and finding out that its mostly made up of all his favorite cheesecake recipes. If I wanted to read about a vintner, philosopher, comedian or Arizona I'd pick up another book about someone who's made a real impact in that space.

The book, very purposely skips, the creation of the last two albums, gives only a few lines to the previous ones, has some sparse prose on the legal issues with Zoo, relationships with his band over the years, anecdotes from concerts and tours and spends more time on the dreams he had persuading him to move to Arizona or selecting grapes. I don't care that he lives in Arizona or what makes a great Shiraz. I get the feeling that he finds Tool to be some kind of a scar in his portfolio and wants to be known as something else. Like he made such a totally misfired attempt at a band and the end result of Tool was not what he wanted at all. What a beautiful mistake. Be grateful for what you are are and not what you think you should have been.

His fixation on being a comedian and thinking he is a comedian are so misguided and tiring. Aenima is introduced as partly a comedy album. What?! I never once thought it was funny. "LOL listen to Aenima!" The album was so emotional, epic and full of release but funny it was not. The Bill Hicks moments in it I thought at one point had some kind of a deep eerie meaning. Now I realize MJK was trying to push his comedic agenda like he did at other times mentioned in the book like at Tool concerts only to have the fans boo it off. He grumbles that hes more than a metal singer and people took the music too seriously.

There's no interesting character build up that one may feel would lead to the cathartic music. No hardships in his childhood, got amazing grades and attended a top university, was an amazing illustrator, an amazing wrestler, amazing runner, amazing poet, had jobs he was promoted at and was just all around so amazing. Zzzz. You get the feeling that his outcomes were actually not his intention and he's trying to reposition his legacy. Only reason he had any success in any of his other projects from wine through to APC and Puscifer or his "comedy" projects is because of his obsessively loyal base of Tool fans, many of which who'd actually buy a Maynard James Keenan cookbook.
271 reviews3 followers
February 7, 2017
Somewhere early in this book about Tool's singer, Maynard James Keenan, it becomes evident that none of his artistry is included in the writing or story telling. The author is not MJK and is told in a weird 3rd person narrative with wholly fictional stories that combine with a lack of depth I have never seen in any book I've ever read. This is a travesty as the subject is possibly the most artistic and enigmatic character in modern music. This book is a stink bomb.
Profile Image for Kirsten.
136 reviews47 followers
December 10, 2016
This is what a rock and roll bio should be.
Profile Image for Carolyn Sunseri.
53 reviews1 follower
December 2, 2016
Really disappointed. This book was downright painful to read. I am a big fan of MJK and love his music, talent, lyricism and even his dark stage persona. And this biography/memoir was boring, disjointed and I could not connect with it at all. Why they chose to write it third person and then spliced with unnecessary quotes from Maynard is beyond me. The style was cold and just felt narcissistic. I couldn't finish the book. I am choosing to appreciate Maynard for all the things I admire, even if maybe I live in a little bit of denial. :)
Profile Image for Samantha Lane.
9 reviews9 followers
February 7, 2017
Plodding through the saccharine prose that bulks out the majority of the biography, I really had to wonder if Jensen had considered her audience for Contrary Things. I almost put the book down permanently after a torturous extended passage describing Keenan sitting on a beach with his 'Twizzlers' and gazing at his surroundings: 'All but empty on a weekday morning, Singing Beach was the serene setting he required, a place of sand dollars and shells of the moon snail, forked tracks of seabirds, and shimmering dragonflies amid the beach grass ...'

However, had I put the book down I would have missed Keenan's quotes, which interjected Jensen's writing like shimmering dragonflies amid the beach grass. I would have missed recounts that, while irritatingly trite and cliched in Jensen's odd phrasing, and so far removed from Keenan's own use of language, offered glimpses into his life that helped further my understanding of this very private creative.

In short, you have to wade through the crap to find the corn. Even after finishing the book, you still feel as cheated as a fan at a Tool concert, squinting for a sign of Keenan somewhere in the dark at the back of the stage. You get the feeling that, not only do you not get the full picture, that's the way Keenan wants it. But it trumps trawling the internet and piecing together dubious snippets from awful fan forums or sources who clearly aren't 'fully authorised', as it is claimed Jensen is.

Many of the moments that make this book worth reading are the accounts that shed light on Keenan's influences. Family histories, friends and connections, artists, authors, music and movements, landscapes, cities, cultures and experiences. I finally understand the blue body paint. Contrary Things does offer a glimpse of the influences that helped shaped the vision for Tool, APC, Puscifer, and a wide array of other creative projects the book details Keenan's part in.

Unfortunately for Tool fans, it's really just a glimpse. This biography keeps its readers at arm's length, both with its maddening style and Keenan's reluctance to be in the spotlight.
Profile Image for David Wesson.
21 reviews2 followers
September 11, 2018
This author has the ability to take one of the most interesting subjects and write the most boring books ever written.
Profile Image for MonumentToDecency.
160 reviews29 followers
February 21, 2019
description

There's a reason I don't read auto/biographies. The writer/subject too often cherry picks bits and pieces from their lives to make the subject seem either like a hero or a victim. It would be nice to read just one auto/biography where the subject is simply human, with victories and failings. MJK's cherry pickings fall into the 'hard-done-by but ever the hero' category.

I'm not saying the subject shouldn't get to cherry pick, it is their life after all, and a book is one piece of them that is guaranteed to live on after the songs or movies or celebrity has long since faded away. But could they cherry pick with a bit less bias maybe.

In case you missed it, Maynard James Keenan is the singer in Tool (and A Perfect Circle and Puscifer). He writes incredible lyrics, creates mesmerising vocal melodies, his voice is like liquid gold and rubies and emeralds, he has amazing vocal range. Tool is my heroin. I'm certainly no super fan but I feel pretty close to it when I listen to their music (which is way too often).

In reading A Perfect Union of Contrary Things I wasn't after a book about Tool, I wanted to know exactly what made MJK into the genius singer and lyricist he is (and seems to have always been). Many Tool songs are critical of organised religion - not spirituality, not personal faith - and all that goes with organised religion: unquestioning faith, obedience in the face of contradiction and harm, sacrifice of personhood for the 'greater good' of a church, adherence to intolerance and hate because 'the book' dictates that.

Tool and APC fans know the story of MJKs (in)famous mother, Judith, who suffered through 27 years of paralysis, half-blindness and aphasia after an aneurysm and two strokes which ultimately killed her. She was a devout churchgoer but her church group decided that she "got sick" because she "wasn't right with god". The church group decided that it wasn't proper for to attend church "in the slacks she wore over her incontinence pads," yet Judith's faith never waned. And from those 10,000 Days of suffering MJK was able to create some of the most insightful lyrical analyses ever written on the topic of personal religiosity which resonate with millions of people around the planet. But what else made MJK into the man he is?

According to this biography, at school he was an overachieving athlete and artist, in the military he was an overachieving soldier, in church he was an overachieving choirboy, he was an overachiever in comedy, and an overachieving merchandiser at the pet store he worked at. Now he's an overachieving musician, an overachieving jiu jitsu practioner, and an overachieving vintner. But! he had to give up acting because 'other people' were making it too hard for him to excel - his one failure, but it wasn't his failing so ... make of that what you will.

And that's about it. We hear time and time again how he excels at every single thing he puts his mind to, and ... it gets a bit boring. Like, really boring. The man should just walk around with a trumpet glued to his mouth. We're told how highly intelligent MJK is so many times that I'm sure some of my brains cells fled due to the tedium.

We don't hear much of MJKs passion for things, instead we repeatedly hear how he see's someone else doing a thing and he decides he'll give it a whirl too, just until he masters it and then he ambles on to overachieve with the next thing.

One thing that irritated the heck out of me was a flashback to his military years in the early 1980's where he wrote a letter to a friend:
As you know, cows sleep standing up,� he wrote. “What you can do is push the fucker over and run, cuz when he hits he’s gonna wake up and chase; more fun.
This from a man who was born with a higher intelligence than everyone on the planet.

My gripe?
1. Cows actually spend up to 14 hours a day sitting on their arse. They sleep laying down, not standing.
2. Cows weigh between 750 and 1100 kilograms, that is, up to a tonne. A car. Trying pushing a tonne over, even with 5 people that won't be easy.
3. Cows won't give chase, they'll be irritated and run away. A bull is going to gore you the second you step in its paddock.

I hope at some point in his life of high intelligence MJK has learned that cow tipping and all claims to it is simply rubbish. Yet, the fact that this anecdote was included in this 'book of things he wants to be remembered for' makes me think he's still one of those idiots that believes in cow tipping.

Far from MJK being the perfect overachieving and highly intelligent man this book paints him as, he's about as average as the next extremely average bore:
A month into the [acting] course, Maynard’s concerned coach took him aside. “He said he thought he knew what my problem was,� Maynard remembered. “He felt that I was absolutely terrified that I was average.�
And he is. So extremely average. Yet it feels like the writer is constantly trying to make him seem exceptional. Sure, MJK has done exceptional things, amazing things, but when it comes down to it he's just a guy. An average man, with average interests, with an average upbringing, with an average education, living an average life, but every now and then something inside him is released and out comes... a beast. MJK is the tool he warns us about.

Even onstage he looks like an imposter trying his best to fill a role that he clearly can't fill. But maybe that's the allure: Mr average stumbled into something so far removed from average. He's like Bill Gates in that he couldn't be more dull and boring yet he has created and maintained something mind-blowing. If he weren't so average how would MJK be able to recognise and communicate how average the rest of us are: that we're a bunch of sycophantic tools, that the only thing that could save us is , that we make everything an , that we're all two faced, that we choose to allow to destroy us, that we're all just ignorant with short memories.

So much self proclaimed perfection makes me think he hates himself and thinks he is a loser. I liked him better before reading this. I wanted to know what drove him to hate war and fighting; What made him realise that if ""; What made him write the bitter tirade against L. Ron Hubbard, . But, by the Knights Who Say Ni, did we really have to go through the constant egomania to learn the story behind the man. Just the basic facts would do.

While it's 99.9% well written and well researched, it's just a trumpet. If you like Tool, APC, or Puscifer you might want to give this one a miss. I'd prefer to wait another 13 years for a new Tool album than read anything more about the Amazing Maynard and His Educated Elitism.

My rating : 3 rotten grapes out of 5

My grandmother always said that famous people are amazing until they open their mouth, then they fall right back down to earth with the rest of us. She was right. All my heroes have officially fallen. Meanwhile, Kurt Cobain would have been 52 this year.
Profile Image for Heather.
17 reviews
July 20, 2017
Written by a very close friend of MJK who borderline deifies him. Wish the author had been either MJK, or an objective journalist. Could not finish.
Profile Image for William Fuentes.
361 reviews2 followers
March 21, 2018
It was interesting reading about MJK's experiences that led to where he is today.
Profile Image for Malgrin.
5 reviews
February 4, 2017
First and foremost, I enjoyed reading about the life (and particularly the choices) of an artist that I greatly admire. The book read like a breadcrumb trail - which I appreciate, because I tend to view life that way. I also appreciate the fact that "meaningless detours" often became something important in retrospect (which is also how I tend to view life).

More than anything, I feel inspired. Resolved. I nearly wrote "Resolved?" and the idea of pairing a word like "resolved" with a question mark really amuses me. That question mark would be a way out. More decisive punctuation was necessary.

Making art - creating - is an imperative...or it is just a hobby. If I burn to do something, then I will either do it, or the "burn" is just something I'm telling myself in order to feel more interesting or relevant. DO what you want to DO and CREATE what you want to CREATE - or just stop whimpering about it and go watch TV.

These were things I needed to know and think about. Now.
Profile Image for Diana.
598 reviews15 followers
February 7, 2017
Clearly being the Tool fan I am, I'm not going to give this any less than 4 stars. But it's more 4+ stars for Maynard and maybe 3 stars for Sarah Jensen's writing. It was written in a very...strange kind of way, almost reading like a fictional account. I saw someone else use the word "saccharine" to describe the prose, and I would very much agree. I guess when you are such a close, longtime friend of the person you're writing about, it's hard not to be fairly sentimental about your subject. That said, I liked how a lot of the words and turns of phrase really harkened back to some of the songs and their lyrics. I loved learning more about this very private entertainer, whose work I've followed for over 20 years, and I enjoyed the snippets that Maynard himself contributed. If I'm being honest, I would have liked some more in-depth exploration of the music itself, but on the whole, it was worth the read, especially for Maynard's legion of fans.
Profile Image for Jayme Lubben.
4 reviews4 followers
November 20, 2016
Highly recommend this well-written journey of Maynard's life from student to soldier to rocker to winemaker. I have been enamored with MJK's voice, lyrics and passion since I was 14 and Tool's Sober made its debut on MTVs headbanger's ball. Since then I have been to dozens of his shows with all three of his bands and his music is always in my life. This book brought back some really great memories of some of his most eccentric and impressive performances. Everything about this paradox of a man makes a lot more sense now
Profile Image for Amanda.
50 reviews3 followers
January 4, 2024
This book is terrible. I really don't recommend it to anyone except maybe a die hard Tool fan who actually believes that Maynard James Keenan has never done anything wrong in his life ever, that he's the smartest man in the world or possibly the entire universe, and everyone else is just too stupid to get the joke.

I have actually owned the hardcover since it came out. I think I might have even pre-ordered it. I'm a big fan of the band Tool and MJK' s other projects. I don't however, worship him, think he is a god, or believe that he has never done anything wrong, ever.

He hired a close friend to write this "autobiography" and that's no surprise--he would want someone who wouldn't reveal anything of substance and would write exactly what he told her to about himself. Since he guards his privacy like Fort Knox, I'm surprised he bothered to put out a book at all. Maybe because he knew it would only include things people already knew, or the lies he wanted to out out there. Because there are definitely some of those too. Anyone who's been a fan for many years will notice contradictions.

He comes off as a condescending a-hole throughout. Early on, he moves to a new school and is seemingly baffled that the other kids don't immediately recognize his superiority. But eventually he wins the girls over because they think he's sooooo funny and smart. Sigh. He even makes himself sound like a superhero for picking on his fellow students for their "uncool wardrobes and inane jokes." But then, he goes on to explain, he only did to those who deserved it. To those who he could magically tell had hard lives at home, he would grace by leaving them alone. A real Robin Hood of high school-making fun of the rich and leaving the poor alone.

I wanted a book about something else. Not this watered down self-congratulatory nonsense. I knew what MJK was like, of course. I delayed reading this because I was afraid it would be like this, but hoped maybe I was wrong.

Occasionally he did manage to acknowledge that he didn't have all the answers, but even that was condescending. He blames fans for not understanding his message in the album Aenima or for being "sheep" who just follow him, basically the way others follow evangelists or similar idealogues. Well, he is right--no one should treat him like a god. But the way he self-deprecates from time to time comes off as false humility. It's kind of strange, because I have watched interviews with him where he has not been nearly this insufferable.

This book actually manages to be worse than Richard Blade's and Chuck Negron of Three Dog Night's autobiographies, and those were complete trash. Nobody is perfect. And while we know you guys have big egos, it gets incredibly boring to read a memoir where you are always the good guy, and everyone else is the problem.

Easily the worst book I have read this year--and I read some doozies. Might end up being an all-time worst after some time passes.

Maybe Danny, Adam, or Justin will put out memoirs, and there will be something interesting to read about a member of the band. Considering how long it takes them to put out albums, I won't hold my breath.

0/5 stars
Profile Image for Conner.
120 reviews
November 14, 2022
My first introduction with Maynard came from watching MTV before school. The song “Weak and Powerless� got me hooked and from there, I was buying up albums from A Perfect Circle and Tool. In 2007, I even made it up to Spokane for their 10,000 Days tour. I also donned an APC shirt in my high school days.

Maynard James Keenan (or James Herbert Keenan) grew up in the Midwest and took a liking to Cross Country, which he excelled at. After high school, he enlisted in the military. His testing scores were outstanding - and that made him a candidate for West Point. After the military, he moved to Boston with friends and ran a pet store, and to this day, appears to still be an animal lover. He had friends In the music scene and one day he simply wanted to start a band. He had recorded some earlier tracks and with a few buddies, started what would become Tool (“Toolshed� was also a band name contender). It didn’t take long for their music career to take off. Pretty soon, his skills brought him to other bands such as A Perfect Circle and Puscifer. Aside from being a rock star, he also owns a winery (Caduceus) down in Jerome, Arizona. I highly recommend the documentary “Blood into Wine� on prime that covers his background in wine and the creation of his vineyard and winery.

The book touched on all the fine points throughout Maynard’s life from the beginning to present day. It includes some of his own quotes and perspectives. He is certainly an interesting, hard working, and incredibly creative individual. Whether it be in music or in his vineyard, he is the type that rolls up his sleeves and sets out to challenge himself. “Life is too short not to create something with every breath we draw.�

People told him he was crazy to try and grow grapes down in Arizona. Some vineyards had existed in the past, but it has not been done for a long time. He sought the challenge and overcame it. Now his wines are regarded as world-renowned. I’m planning on getting down to Jerome to see this work of art in the near future. I’ll probably listen to some Tool and APC along the way.
Profile Image for Sarah.
1,074 reviews6 followers
April 22, 2022
I don’t know what I expected from this book, but this was not it. Keenan is so normal and smart. It was actually a little boring because of the complete lack of drama.
Profile Image for Jeff.
46 reviews
July 15, 2017
I didn't love this book, but it is well-written (primarily) by Maynard's friend, Sarah Jensen. Maynard offers little tidbits of quoted insights sprinkled throughout the book. Most of the detailed narrative covers his early years leading up to the formation of Tool in L.A. After that the pace really picks up, and the "success" years seem to fly by in the last 100 pages or so. Hardcore fans of Maynard's music may be underwhelmed by the relative lack of information about tours, albums, etc., but I suppose you can find all that online these days. The book wasn't a page turner - I picked it up and put it down several times over eight months. But if you're interested in what makes the man tick, you'll find a few answers here. I hope there is a sequel published in a few years that covers in more detail Maynard's passion for winemaking and vineyard development in Northern Arizona.
Profile Image for Kristen Claiborn.
684 reviews4 followers
July 28, 2022
The only reason this book got two stars from me is because I managed to finish it, otherwise it’s a hot mess. I struggled with even wanting to write a review for this one because I really didn’t like it…ANY of it. I was never a fan of Tool, after hearing one song I was immediately turned off, and I knew absolutely nothing about the man behind the voice. Hell, I didn’t even know his name prior to picking up this book. I almost bowed out of writing this simply because I don’t think I can do it politely, but my husband says I don’t have to be polite, so here we go.
Keenan mentions repeatedly how his discontent affected his life, but upon learning about his life, it’s hard to determine where that discontent originated from. His early years were spent with his mother, but she became ill, so Keenan was sent to live with his father and stepmother. There isn’t much reflection on how deeply he was affected by his mother’s illness, and even less on how he was treated by his father and stepmother. I was expecting tales of abuse or neglect, but none of that appeared to have happened. Indifference towards him, maybe, but even that isn’t very clear. A lot of effort was put into writing about how well-received and well-loved he was by everybody he encountered at school. His teachers loved him, his coaches loved him, his classmates loved. He claims to have been hailed as the most natural athlete and leader seen at his high school. One teacher was even quoted as saying he was very comfortable to be with, which seems unlikely. Not because he wasn’t comfortable to be with, but that a teacher would ever say that, even years later. It was that particular quote that led me to believe that a lot of this book is, shall we say, fabricated? Maybe embellished would be a better word.
Not only is Keenen the best athlete and student ever, he apparently had the highest ASVAB score ever seen, which allowed to join the military and be picky about what he wanted to do. Turns out he didn’t want to be in the military, he wanted to go to art school…except even that wasn’t what he wanted to do. After leaving the military, he decided to paint himself as a societal outcast and return to his hometown, only to be angry that he was then treated as a societal outcast. Finding himself frustrated with art school, he took himself to LA to live out everybody’s dream of being a starving (and whiny) artist. In LA, he found himself rubbing shoulders with talented musicians, and after fiddling around with his own musical “talents�, he finally opted on a direction…and along the way taught the lead guitarist of Rage Against the Machine how to optimally play the guitar (again, seems far-fetched at best). From there, his musical career blossomed and Tool became a thing.
No need to say anything about Tool.
The last part that genuinely baffled me was his decision to move to Arizona and start a vineyard. At some point he mentioned that his lone vineyard would be the one reason Arizona’s economy would flourish…you know, because Sedona and Scottsdale haven’t been a playground for the well-off for decades. Arizona’s economy wouldn’t survive without him, he was there to save the day. His heavily inflated view of his self-importance shined through, a beacon of narcissism. The perfect example of a…tool�
The writing was rudimentary, combining simple elements with unnecessarily huge words. There’s only so many $20 words needed, and this author used them all…frequently, making it seem like she was trying to appeal to the “intellectual,� yet failing to be as eloquent as she was striving for. In the end, she came across as a member of the Keenan cult. There was very little redeeming about Keenan…or this book.

Profile Image for Drew.
168 reviews7 followers
June 6, 2019
Musically and artistically, Maynard has been a big influence on me since 2001, when Lateralus came out. I still listen to it, but now find more meaning in the music and lyrics than I did in high school. I’ve been a fan of APC and Puscifer, too, and I think APC is my favorite band. I was interested in seeing what his story was, to see what ingredients make up such an artistic force. Overall, the book was a great guide to his life and work.

I would have liked more detail around the time from 2001-2003 ish, the time when Lateralus and Thirteenth Step were released. Those 2 albums are the peak of his career to me, and they were a bit rushed over.

But as for his life, the book does a great job of communicating not just the events, but Maynard’s motivations and beliefs. Learning that he is a huge Joseph Campbell nerd was cool. Campbell’s perspective on humanity’s need for stories, and it’s common psychological roots, has certainly colored a lot of things in my life. It’s not surprising that Maynard would find resonance in Campbell’s ideas.

Also I can finally put my debate to rest, as to whether, if we ever met, we could talk or if he would hate my guts. The answer is, I think, that we could talk, but as soon as he realized I had a slight artistic bend toward writing and music, and that I wasn’t pursuing it, he wouldn’t like me. Paraphrasing from a direct quote of his: if you have the ability to do these things, and you don’t, shame on you.
Profile Image for Clifford.
184 reviews2 followers
January 3, 2017
What did I think of this book? Not much. Not a good read, sloppy writing at times and yet very confusing. The author, jumps around so much in the narrative, you often forget what the original idea was. She gathers together a small group of people who spend more time praising Maynard, you would think that he has the Midas touch in every endeavor, has solved world peace, and cured Cancer. Bits and pieces are interesting, but they get lost in all of the flowery verbiage. Make no mistake, I came at this book having seen Tool multiple times, the first time being at the sweltering Lollapalooza show in New Orleans in 1993. I have seen the progression of the band. I have seen Maynard go from being a raging screaming front man to a shadow at the back of the stage. Why is that? Maybe a little insight to that would have been interesting. Could have been and should have been better.
Profile Image for Chad Geese.
25 reviews12 followers
February 6, 2017
Maynard takes the situation he is in and creates. Whether it's a song, movie, or vineyard he lets something grab a hold of him and the passion takes over. Maynard is an interesting dude the whole walk from Massachusetts to Scottville, Michigan going through Canada was all fascinating to me. It's experiences like that which set a tone for what you want out of life. I think this book is great for someone who doesn't even listen to tool, APC or Puscifer. If anything if you stumbled across this book and knew absolutely nothing about MJK or the bands you may open up to listening to them with an open heart and mind... Or maybe not. That being said MJK found a way to express himself and get paid to do it.
Profile Image for Sean Thornton.
7 reviews
January 11, 2017
This is a fairly fluffy piece of reading. Sarah Jensen writes in a very flowery and descriptive way that can come off as overwrought and even patronizing at times. But be clear, the book is about the man.

The most compelling parts of the book come from the bits and pieces of Keenan's philosophy and formative design the book presents.

The book tries to be two things at once and succeeds only once while describing Keenan's approach to Tool, songwriting, and approach to creativity.

The book would have been better served as a more gritty story focused on the story of the man or an open-ended discussion of Keenan's storytelling philosophy and approach to creativity.
Profile Image for Corinna Liscumb.
50 reviews43 followers
December 10, 2016
this is more of a 3 or 3.5 star but i just can't bring myself to click the third star because even though this book was lacking for me i still love and admire Maynard so much that i have to give it 4 stars. i had no idea that he was a cross country and track runner in school and the army! *swoon*
Profile Image for David Melbie.
817 reviews32 followers
March 14, 2017
Well, we have Joni Mitchell and Joseph Campbell as huge influences in common, so it is no surprise that I found this man's story fascinating. A true Wanderer.
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