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"Being offended is the natural consequence of leaving one's home. I do not like aftershave lotion, adults who roller-skate, children who speak French, or anyone who is unduly tan. I do not, however, go around enacting legislation and putting up signs. In private I avoid such people; in public they have the run of the place. I stay at home as much as possible, and so should they. When it is necessary, however, to go out of the house, they must be prepared, as I am, to deal with the unpleasant...

Here's a tip for everyone doing NaNoWriMo.

Say while you're working on your book you get an idea for a decent 2-4K short story, but are uncertain whether you should take a break long enough to write it.

Now this isn't an instance of "I think this'll make a good story". No, this is the story has more or less bubbled forth fully formed out of the froth of your NaNoWriMo-fevered brain, and since you've been putting in long hours pounding the keys you KNOW you can write this story, polish it, and g...

Is that the royal "we"?

 Narcissism and the abuse of the word narcissism. People taking a "break" from the Internet only to return 12 hours later to tweet what flavor pop tart they had for breakfast. Cousin to this habit is "I have awesome news but I can't tell you about it right now" tweets. Writing advice from everyone who ever so much as received a C- or higher on an English assignment. Blog stats, circles, Facebook friends, and twitter followers allow us to quantify our attention...

Go forth and scare the bejesus out of children.

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While drinking my beer in an empty bar this weekend I read Arthur Machen's "The White People". That's a creepy book. CREEPY. Once you get past the standard Machen frame of two Victorian weirdoes talking about "evil" and get into the found manuscript, the story gets weird.

Very, very weird.

That part, The Green Book, is written by a girl remembering her encounter with "the White People". (And yes, haha, I get it, funny funny, but even that joke might make for an interesting postcolonial story...

- My students have been pestering me for candy and it's not even Halloween yet. I'll likely make some blood and guts Samhain Neopagan powerpoint illustrated with Large Marge animated gifs (� or something) for Monday and we'll make origami pumpkins (� or something). Chance of mayhem? High.

- Speaking of classroom mayhem, I had a dream Johnny Cash was in my class. He sat in the back, wore black, and was a shitty student, making fun of every word I said.

- Why's it that when someone tells you a...

I'll spare everyone the stories of bus karaoke. Let's just say I have new found fear of some of my coworkers. This hike was part of a school trip where all the teachers rent a bus and have "fun" together. "Fun" meaning hiking, meaning walking up a mountain and down again and then eating so much food as to be near to bursting.

That's "fun".

Anyway, we went to and walked through the mountain gates would-be Confucian scholars would have to pass through when on their way to Seoul to take ...

I still get stressed out whenever I have to get my haircut.

Last year I made the mistake of going to one of my student's mom's place to get my haircut. This was a bad idea. The woman's "face" ended up being on the line, so basically she cut two hairs, fled across the room, made me some coffee, and then ushered me out. After that I stuck with the woman who kept the place beside the headstone seller. She was not related to any of my students and didn't have to worry about what might happen if...

Hand-colored Lumiere Brothers film from 1896 of Loie Fuller dancing with (modern) music by Raph Regan.

Save the planet by remembering the three Rs: R-something, R-something, and Recycle!

Never give up on your dreams even when your father beats you.

Husbands wouldn't kill themselves if their wives cooked for them more often.

Don't be a jerkface especially if you're Cinderella.

People listen to reason. It's really quite simple. Like this:

Villain: I'm going to do this evil thing.

Hero: Don't do that evil thing. It's bad and will hurt people.

Villain: Oh, you're right. How foolish of me...