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How to Argue: Powerfully, Persuasively, Positively
The ability to persuade, influence and convince is a vital skill for success in work and life. However, most of us have little idea how to argue well. Indeed, arguing is still seen by many as something to be avoided at all costs, and mostly it's done poorly, or not at all. Yet it's possibly the most powerful and yet most neglected asset you could have. Discover the art of arguing powerfully, persuasively and positively and you'll have a head start every time you want to:
Get your point across effectively
Persuade other people to your way of thinking
Keep your cool in a heated situation
Win people over
Get what you want
Tackle a difficult person or topic
Be convincing and articulate
Have great confidence when you speak In How to Argue, leading lawyer Jonathan Herring reveals the secrets and subtleties of making your case and winning hearts and minds. At home or at work, you'll be well equipped to make everything you say have the desired effect, every time.
Get your point across effectively
Persuade other people to your way of thinking
Keep your cool in a heated situation
Win people over
Get what you want
Tackle a difficult person or topic
Be convincing and articulate
Have great confidence when you speak In How to Argue, leading lawyer Jonathan Herring reveals the secrets and subtleties of making your case and winning hearts and minds. At home or at work, you'll be well equipped to make everything you say have the desired effect, every time.
218 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2010
189 people are currently reading
1601 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 53 reviews
April 5, 2013
Yes, for me, a person who has a very difficult time arguing, this book takes the cake! I have not read it exactly word for word, but can tell you I have skimmed it over, read this and that, and from what I have read so far, this WILL help me when it comes to having to be argumentative!
I've never been good at being persuasive, so this WILL help me tremendously, if I have to do it. (I hate having to argue, which is probably why I am not good at it.) It is written very well, and the examples given as to 'how' to do it correctly are very good. It is a GREAT book to have and be able to reference back to as well.
I bought this book specifically for myself, and for the reasons stated above, and this book, for me will be a great go-to indeed.
I've never been good at being persuasive, so this WILL help me tremendously, if I have to do it. (I hate having to argue, which is probably why I am not good at it.) It is written very well, and the examples given as to 'how' to do it correctly are very good. It is a GREAT book to have and be able to reference back to as well.
I bought this book specifically for myself, and for the reasons stated above, and this book, for me will be a great go-to indeed.
February 27, 2017
Captain Obvious in da city
March 29, 2013
Arguments aren’t mathematical proofs, governed by the rules of logic alone. Arguments follow patterns that are dictated by emotions, by cognitive biases, and by habits. This excellent book briefly and clearly lays out the rules of arguments, and gives you the tools to identify and bypass the traps.
An example: Herring has a few questions for you to consider before you even enter an argument:
I know you know this stuff. There shouldn’t be anything novel in the book. But laying it all out in one place and connecting the pieces together make for a useful and powerful tool.
The section on Burden of Proof was the bit that stuck in my mind, now I’m chairing our school board. I wonder how I'm skewing the discussion simply by how I frame it.
An example: Herring has a few questions for you to consider before you even enter an argument:
Could there be a productive outcome from this argument?
Is it better to have the argument in private or with other people around?
Do you have the information you need to make a good argument?
Are you feeling emotionally ready for the argument?
Is the other person emotionally ready to hear your arguments?
I know you know this stuff. There shouldn’t be anything novel in the book. But laying it all out in one place and connecting the pieces together make for a useful and powerful tool.
The section on Burden of Proof was the bit that stuck in my mind, now I’m chairing our school board. I wonder how I'm skewing the discussion simply by how I frame it.
Burden of proof. This is a really important issue in arguing, but many people don’t appreciate its significance. Consider a chair of a meeting who says this:
“Well, this proposal looks very interesting. Can anyone think of any reason why we should not proceed?�
By putting the question this way the chair has put the burden of proof on those who don’t think that the proposal should go ahead. There’s no need to make the case for the proposal, that’s assumed. Imagine if the chair had said:
“Well, here’s the proposal. Does anyone think a convincing case has been made to adopt this?�
Hence the approach to take in arguing in favor of buying a particular new car is to say:
“Give me one good reason why we should not buy this car.� By saying this the assumption is made that buying the car is good. You might have said:
“Give me one good reason why we should buy this car.�
But that would put the burden of proof on finding good reasons to purchase the car. So in arguing, seek to steer the argument into asking why your point of view should not be accepted. That way skeptics will remain on your side, unless they’re convinced that there is a good reason to go against you.
October 28, 2018
Though the title talks about "How to Argue" essentially its about Influencing, persuading and negotiation. Jonathan has used simple language and with lots of examples, that's what I like about a book, easy to comprehend and actionable. Some of the chapters I specifically liked are First "Be Prepared", preparation is key, keep your facts checked and also be aware of statistical tricks other can use, question the facts/statistics, like who conducted the research, what was the sample size, is sample a good representation, challenge the conclusion, is the logic flawed with many examples. Second: Excel at responding to arguments like thinking carefully about what arguments the other person will listen to. what are their preconceptions? Which kinds of arguments do they find convincing? in Summary, this is a book after reading, one could put their point across effectively, persuade other people to your way of thinking, keep your cool in a heated situation, win people over, get what you want, tackle difficult person or topic, be convincing and articulate, have great confidence when you speak.
December 23, 2015
Constant arguing over and over about same topics with different people and settings, big or small, without any meaningful resolutions tired me out and pushed me to look for this book and it didn't disappoint. True, you already know most things in this book, but none has systematically organized the how-to into a handbook for arguing with productivity and grace.
December 15, 2022
ส่วนตัวแล้วจัดว่าเป็นหนังสือที่ดีเลยครับ อ่านง่าย แต่ละบทมีสรุ� มีแนวทางให้ลงมือทำ ชื่อหนังสือที่แปลไทยมานั้นอาจจะเป็นแค่ส่วนหนึ่งเท่านั้� แต่ชื่อหนังสือต้นฉบับนั้นชัดเจนถึงเทคนิคและสถานการณ์การโต้แย้� ไม่ต้องมีเนื้อหาละเอียดมากก็มากเพียงพอที่จะใช้ประโยชน์จากหนังสือเล่มนี้แล้ว
สิ่งชัดเจนคื�"การใช้หูมากกว่าปาก" ที่เป็นหัวใจหลักจึงน่าจะเป็นที่มาของชื่อหนังสือที่แปลไท�
สิ่งชัดเจนคื�"การใช้หูมากกว่าปาก" ที่เป็นหัวใจหลักจึงน่าจะเป็นที่มาของชื่อหนังสือที่แปลไท�
June 29, 2012
There is nothing earth shattering here. It's a good overview of logic and other considerations in presenting a good argument.
I read the Kindle version.
I read the Kindle version.
April 24, 2024
The First half of the book focuses on ten golden rules for arguing, and then the second half applies those rules to specific instances.
The rules are all eminently sensible, such as: prepare your information before starting an argument. And: know when to walk away from an argument, (etc). Often, knowing when to walk away, is a matter of knowing which arguments are worthwhile, in the sense that they can lead to an outcome. For example, there is no point arguing against people who claim that nothing will change their mind.
Another example of an argument to walk away from involves inappropriate contexts. The book gives the examples of Uncle Jeff making Homophobic comments at Christmas dinner. The author suggests that an argument in that context will upset everyone and achieve little, if anything. So, Uncle Jeff’s comments are best ignored or deflected into something more suitable to the occasion. This means that his comments can be followed up later in a more suitable 1:1 context.
The final golden rule is to maintain relationships. Winning an argument at the cost of losing a friend, may mean that an argument is technically won, but the opponent may feel so hurt or upset that there will be no ‘acceptance� of the point that was being argued about. This is an important point which arguers need to reflect on. Is the point of an argument to ‘win it,� in the sense of rebutting an opponent’s views, or is the purpose ‘to change the views of an opponent.� People assume that the first leads to the second, but that isn’t necessarily the case, especially if the style of argument has forgotten about the importance of trying to maintain relationships throughout the argument.
The 10 golden rules in the first half of the book are all ‘common sense� rules when we think about the art of arguing. But part of the problem which the book is trying to address, is that people may find themselves not reflecting on the nature of argument until they are in the middle of an actual argument, and arguing is not an ideal context for meta-arguing reflection.
The second part of the book applies the rules of arguing to specific circumstances, like arguing with loved ones, or arguing with children, or arguing in the workplace. There are subtle differences between those kinds of contexts and they are explained clearly and informatively.
Overall, this is a relatively quick and straight forward book about styles of argument. It contains few technicalities about the logic of argument, so it is suitable for general readers. Readers familiar with Critical Thinking or aspects of Philosophy, Psychology or Logic may find that they learn relatively little from the book. Perhaps it would have been helpful to flag up to readers that this is pitched at ‘introductory� level?
(These are comments based on the 2012 Pearson edition).
The rules are all eminently sensible, such as: prepare your information before starting an argument. And: know when to walk away from an argument, (etc). Often, knowing when to walk away, is a matter of knowing which arguments are worthwhile, in the sense that they can lead to an outcome. For example, there is no point arguing against people who claim that nothing will change their mind.
Another example of an argument to walk away from involves inappropriate contexts. The book gives the examples of Uncle Jeff making Homophobic comments at Christmas dinner. The author suggests that an argument in that context will upset everyone and achieve little, if anything. So, Uncle Jeff’s comments are best ignored or deflected into something more suitable to the occasion. This means that his comments can be followed up later in a more suitable 1:1 context.
The final golden rule is to maintain relationships. Winning an argument at the cost of losing a friend, may mean that an argument is technically won, but the opponent may feel so hurt or upset that there will be no ‘acceptance� of the point that was being argued about. This is an important point which arguers need to reflect on. Is the point of an argument to ‘win it,� in the sense of rebutting an opponent’s views, or is the purpose ‘to change the views of an opponent.� People assume that the first leads to the second, but that isn’t necessarily the case, especially if the style of argument has forgotten about the importance of trying to maintain relationships throughout the argument.
The 10 golden rules in the first half of the book are all ‘common sense� rules when we think about the art of arguing. But part of the problem which the book is trying to address, is that people may find themselves not reflecting on the nature of argument until they are in the middle of an actual argument, and arguing is not an ideal context for meta-arguing reflection.
The second part of the book applies the rules of arguing to specific circumstances, like arguing with loved ones, or arguing with children, or arguing in the workplace. There are subtle differences between those kinds of contexts and they are explained clearly and informatively.
Overall, this is a relatively quick and straight forward book about styles of argument. It contains few technicalities about the logic of argument, so it is suitable for general readers. Readers familiar with Critical Thinking or aspects of Philosophy, Psychology or Logic may find that they learn relatively little from the book. Perhaps it would have been helpful to flag up to readers that this is pitched at ‘introductory� level?
(These are comments based on the 2012 Pearson edition).
November 9, 2020
Saya bukanlah orang yang argumentatif, saya bahkan cenderung menghindari debat baik itu di dunia nyata maupun di dunia maya karena saya menganggap debat itu tidak berguna. Buku ini membuat saya menyadari bahwa debat tidak selalu buruk. Salah satu kutipan dalam buku ini berbunyi: "tujuan berdebat bukanlah untuk memburu kemenangan, tetapi untuk memperoleh kemajuan".
Buku ini dibagi dalam dua bagian. Bagian pertama mengenai aturan-aturan dalam berdebat, bagian kedua memberi contoh situasi-situasi di mana cara tersebut bisa diterapkan.
Tips-tips bagaimana menyampaikan pendapat kita dengan anggun dan berkelas dibahas dengan gamblang. Salah satu poin paling penting adalah attitude. Betapapun akuratnya fakta yang kita kemukakan, tetapi jika sikap dan cara penyampaian kita tidak empatik, argumen kita tidak akan mengenai sasaran.
Pernahkah kamu merasa bete membaca buku pengembangan diri karena terlalu menggurui? Buku ini jauh dari kesan tersebut. Cara penulisannya bahkan terkesan ramah dan bersahabat sehingga tanpa terasa kita sudah sampai di bab akhir.
Hal lain yang paling saya sukai adalah cara penerjemahannya. Begitu natural mengalir, sama sekali tidak terasa seperti membaca buku terjemahan! Saya sangat mengapresiasi penerjemah dan penyuntingnya.
Saya sangat merekomendasikan buku ini kepada siapa saja yang memiliki kesulitan menyampaikan pendapat atau apapun yang ada di pikirannya. Jika kamu tidak bisa membuat orang lain mengikutimu, setidaknya kamu bisa membuatnya memahami sudut pandangmu.
Buku ini dibagi dalam dua bagian. Bagian pertama mengenai aturan-aturan dalam berdebat, bagian kedua memberi contoh situasi-situasi di mana cara tersebut bisa diterapkan.
Tips-tips bagaimana menyampaikan pendapat kita dengan anggun dan berkelas dibahas dengan gamblang. Salah satu poin paling penting adalah attitude. Betapapun akuratnya fakta yang kita kemukakan, tetapi jika sikap dan cara penyampaian kita tidak empatik, argumen kita tidak akan mengenai sasaran.
Pernahkah kamu merasa bete membaca buku pengembangan diri karena terlalu menggurui? Buku ini jauh dari kesan tersebut. Cara penulisannya bahkan terkesan ramah dan bersahabat sehingga tanpa terasa kita sudah sampai di bab akhir.
Hal lain yang paling saya sukai adalah cara penerjemahannya. Begitu natural mengalir, sama sekali tidak terasa seperti membaca buku terjemahan! Saya sangat mengapresiasi penerjemah dan penyuntingnya.
Saya sangat merekomendasikan buku ini kepada siapa saja yang memiliki kesulitan menyampaikan pendapat atau apapun yang ada di pikirannya. Jika kamu tidak bisa membuat orang lain mengikutimu, setidaknya kamu bisa membuatnya memahami sudut pandangmu.
February 15, 2021
Съветите (т.нар „златн� правила�) са смислени. Някои от примерните дискусии звучат изкуствено, но това най-вероятно е защото ги чета на български.
И все пак, има го типичния за self-help книгите проблем с прекалено очевидните и универсални съвети. А навиците за водене на спор са много трудни за промяна. Може би щеше да е от полза да към практическите съвети да се добавят малко упражнения или казуси.
И все пак, има го типичния за self-help книгите проблем с прекалено очевидните и универсални съвети. А навиците за водене на спор са много трудни за промяна. Може би щеше да е от полза да към практическите съвети да се добавят малко упражнения или казуси.
December 24, 2023
Прекрасна книжка, която те учи как правилно да общуваш и да спориш с хората, за да имаш пълноценни взаимоотношения. Тук там има логика и съвсем повърхностно статистика. Лека и приятна книга за четене. Смятам че това е една от онези базови книги, които всеки един човек трябва да прочете. Чете се за няколко дни. Препоръчвам ви я, ако вече не сте на дълбоко в логиката, статистикат�� и не сте чели книги за взаимоотношения.
November 27, 2018
Buen libro, informativo, con buenos argumentos, pero nada extremadamente especial. Lo que más me gusta es su énfasis en que NO SIEMPRE es bueno discutir. Hay que discernir si es el momento y lugar adecuados, y si esa discusión vale la pena y cómo podría afectar o arruinar nuestra relación con la persona con quien se está discutiendo.
June 13, 2019
This book has 10 rules that will help you get better in every argument.
I started reading this books because i sometimes lose my temper , so If you feel you always get stuck in an argument you should give this book a read.
The author also gives us various life situations through examples which is written in the format of a converstion which is really interesting.
I started reading this books because i sometimes lose my temper , so If you feel you always get stuck in an argument you should give this book a read.
The author also gives us various life situations through examples which is written in the format of a converstion which is really interesting.
February 10, 2025
This book, for a beginner who cannot argue at all is magnificent. It is highly practical, even though there are few chapters that do not really help us as a newbie. However, overall this book is very helpful.
May 7, 2017
It's a little below average book. There is not much in there that wowed me. Most of the things in there are either rudimentary or common sense.
August 17, 2017
ايتبتتبنب. يبق
بتتبنيتيتتي. للمبررات ببرزيزيززيز يريرنيخذعيتريزيرميتيتتينبنباببرتب بوتين تينيت تبني تبني تينيت ابنتي تتببب تتبن متبرئين وبن تبني تنب تبني نننب نننب ننب
بتتبنيتيتتي. للمبررات ببرزيزيززيز يريرنيخذعيتريزيرميتيتتينبنباببرتب بوتين تينيت تبني تبني تينيت ابنتي تتببب تتبن متبرئين وبن تبني تنب تبني نننب نننب ننب
March 22, 2020
pretty straightforward and easy to read
January 25, 2021
A magyar változatát olvastam. Könnyen érthető, jól olvasható könyv. A példák benne szerintem kicsit bugyuták, de a témák szépen ki vannak rejtve.
January 29, 2021
I Dunno, this book for me isn't special... Too regular.
August 21, 2021
When you are kind person, you would do anything to others, however you need to learn how to say NO when they are disrespect to you and when you have other jobs in your hands.
February 2, 2022
Great book and very practical. Also touches on how to apologize and keep respect.
May 23, 2022
แนะนำเทคนิคในการทำความเข้าใจเรื่องเกี่ยวกับการโต้แย้งโต้แย้งเอาไว� อย่างเป็นระบบแต่ก็ไม่ได้ซับซ้อนมากเกินไ� สามารถนำไปปรับใช้ในชีวิตประจำวันได�
July 3, 2022
bagus bukunya, dapat insight baru ttg pentingnya mengelola data, emosional dan mempersiapkan segala hal serta pemahaman tujuan berdebat yang selama ini sering disalahpahami...
September 5, 2022
Интересно четиво... особенно за хора, които винаги са прави.!
March 17, 2023
Surfed through quick. Got some good points but not what I was specifically looking for.
October 1, 2023
เห็นด้ว� ไม่เห็นด้ว� ไม่มีความเห็�
September 24, 2024
Easy to read. There are good tips and examples. However, a lot of parts are pretty common sense, and general
May 1, 2020
Epic book
April 3, 2013
Ten rules on arguing; a series of scenarios and the correct way to approach each issue. From how to deal with kids or coworkers to avoiding common pitfalls when arguing to the correct way to make a complaint to learning to say 'no' if the need arises.
This book offers a series of helpful tips on how to approach an argument with the best chance of success. Each section is clearly explained and given examples to demonstrate both correct and incorrect methods in arguments; although the correct method examples do feel like they might be a little unnatural considering the other person involved might not concede regardless of what you say (but I'm sure this is just me being a skeptic).
While I might not remember everything thing this book has to say on the subject, I'm sure that if I'm ever involved in an argument in future, I will be better equipped to handle it and hold a stronger chance of winning.
Really helpful.
This book offers a series of helpful tips on how to approach an argument with the best chance of success. Each section is clearly explained and given examples to demonstrate both correct and incorrect methods in arguments; although the correct method examples do feel like they might be a little unnatural considering the other person involved might not concede regardless of what you say (but I'm sure this is just me being a skeptic).
While I might not remember everything thing this book has to say on the subject, I'm sure that if I'm ever involved in an argument in future, I will be better equipped to handle it and hold a stronger chance of winning.
Really helpful.
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