A darkly funny and life-affirming debut novel for readers of Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine the story of one man who is offered a second chance at life and love when he develops an unexpected friendship--if he can expose the white lie he told years ago that grew into so much more.
Andrew's day-to-day is a little grim, searching for next of kin for those who die alone. Thankfully, he has a loving family waiting for him when he gets home, to help wash the day's cares away. At least, that's what his coworkers believe.
Andrew didn't mean for the misunderstanding to happen, yet he's become trapped in his own white lie. The fantasy of his wife and two kids has become a pleasant escape from his lonely one bedroom with only his Ella Fitzgerald records for company. But when new employee Peggy breezes into his life like a breath of fresh air, Andrew is shaken out of his routine. She doesn't notice the wall he's been safely hiding behind and their friendship promises to break it down.
Andrew must choose: Does he tell the truth and start really living his life, but risk losing his friendship with Peggy? Or will he stay safe and alone, behind the façade? How Not to Die Alone is about the importance of taking a chance in those moments when we have the most to lose. Sharp and funny, warm and real, it's the kind of big-hearted story we all need.
While this started out a bit slow, I found myself intrigued by this story. I cannot imagine being so lonely. I found the idea of him going out of his way to attend strangers funerals heartwarming. ❤️ I enjoyed the ending, even if I was a bit frustrating with how long it took him to get there. God bless Peggy!! 🙂
I started reading How Not to Die Alone on 5/8/2019 and finished it on 5/10/2019. This story being particularly depressing, but I have to admit that I enjoyed reading it. It’s different. I have never thought about those people who live alone and die alone before. I’m aware of people who live through life that either don’t get married or don’t have children and outlived their spouses but I always thought they may have cousins or live in nursing homes with caretakers. Andrew’s job is interesting, though it’s one job I can never ever perform. I like being educated about this area of death and it opens my eyes to know that any job is possible and death can go undiscovered for so long if one lead such a lonely life.
This book is told in the third person point of view following Andrew, 42, an employee at the Death Administration department of public health. His job is to find families (next of kin) and to inspect the houses of those who dies alone to find assets to cover their own funeral costs. Andrew’s co-workers think that he has a lawyer wife and two kids when he actually comes home from work to an empty house. A mistake made during an interview 5 years ago became a full blown lie. Andrew is a loner who likes to play with model trains and his only best friends are three other model trains enthusiasts on the internet forum. His childhood was particularly depressing where his dad died when he was 3, his mom became withdrawn, his older sister bullied and abandoned him, and finally a secret that left him withdrawn into himself. No one had ever come close to being friends with Andrew until a new employee Peggy joined his department. She shadow him and go with him to inspect houses and attend funerals. They got along well and he even comes out of his shell for her, doing something he normally wouldn’t do like drinking beer on Wednesday, shopping for new clothes, etc.
How Not to Die Alone is very well written and offer a unique topic to think about. Andrew’s life is a bit depressing as well as the topic of the story. He grows up inside a bubble of comfort where he doesn’t socialize and anything outside of his comfort zone scares him. His childhood is a sad one and it explains why his adulthood is no better. I feel so happy when he finally made a friend and he started to develop more feelings than just his mundane days. There were some suspense moments that I thought he would give in to being bullied by his brother-in-law. The people he works with are something else. I like Peggy and her humor. I like the happy ending. I highly recommend everyone to read this book!
Richard Roper has crafted a quirky and uplifting story packed with colorful characters and a unique storyline. The blurb of this book compares it to “Eleanor Oliphant�, Generally I’m not a fan of comparing books but I’d have to say this is an accurate comparison. SO if you loved Eleanor you will also love getting to know Andrew. Andrew is 42, a bit of a loner, and he works for the Ministry of Death. His job includes finding the next of kin for those who die alone, searching their home for valuable possessions that will help pay for their funeral, and then even though it’s not compulsory Andrew attends the funerals for these people who have no one in their lives to say goodbye. Andrew returns home every evening to an empty house, his model trains, and group of eclectic online friends who he met on a model train enthusiast website. However, because of an innocent slip up he made on his job interview his boss Cameron and coworkers believe he returns home every evening to a wife and two kids. When Peggy begins working with Andrew and befriends him and his boss Cameron wants the coworkers to have monthly dinner parties, Andrew is fearful that the truth will come out. Is living with this lie truly living? Will the truth set Andrew free or ruin his life?
Andrew was a lovable vulnerable character that I just wanted to give a big hug. Peggy was great a true breath of fresh air. The friendship that forms between these two was so lovely. Andrew had really got himself into quite the pickle, one white lie that snowballed into something involving spreadsheets. It really was sad to contemplate how these people died alone with seemingly nobody in their lives that cared. And then there was Andrew who had the opportunity to make some choices that would prevent him from being in the same position one day. I think Mr. Roper did an amazing job of showing us how we all have more people in our lives than we think, we just need to know where to look.
This was a feel-good story that made me smile. It’s kind of interesting that a story that features death so prominently could be so uplifting, but this book really was. Simply put this was a quirky tale bursting with heart, hope, and humor!
*** many thanks to GP Putnam’s Sons for my copy ***
What a pickle this book has left me in! I should have hated it because it contained my (maybe only) dealbreaker plotline � one that 99.99999% of the time makes me . . . .
Since I received an early copy, common courtesy says not to divulge too much and ruin things for everyone else. Buuuuuuuuuut, Imma do it anyway because I don’t think it’s fair for readers to spend their dollars on books that they didn’t know contained subject matter that they would have steered clear of if they had known about it, and I don’t think it’s fair for authors to get blasted with 1-Stars due to readers picking up something they should have never touched with a 10-foot pole. But first, let’s briefly go over what this book is even about, shall we?
How Not To Die Alone focuses on 42-year old Andrew. Andrew works for the council as an organizer of “pauper’s funerals.� When someone dies with no apparent next-of-kin, it is Andrew’s job to sort through their homes (no matter how Hoarder-y or disgusting they may be) in search of contact information for any long-lost family or friends (or at least some stashed cash to help cover the burial costs). It’s a perfect fit for Andrew as his job provides plenty of time away from the office and less interaction with others � which is great when you accidentally created a fake wife and children due to not paying attention during your interview (years ago) and failed to ever correct said accidental fib. All that changes when new trainee Peggy is hired and assigned to job shadow Andrew. Funny, friendly, and full of life, Peggy makes Andrew see things in a whole new light.
Okay, so the thing that a lot of people are going to take exception to (myself included) is Peggy is married and has children, but is, at minimum, emotionally cheating on her spouse throughout the duration of this book (not to mention despite Andrew’s family being imaginary, as far as everyone is concerned he’s married too). I’m telling you I’m just not okay with some things. Married co-workers grabbing lunch together during the workday is questionable enough for me when there is clearly a sexual chemistry between the two, but going out to dinner sans spouses? Hell nah. That’s a date, bro, and also known as grounds for divorce. Maybe I'm just old fashioned, but I also think I'm the target demographic for this book and have a sneaking suspicion I'm not the only one with antiquated beliefs who will be interested in checking it out and find themselves a bit put off with this portion of the storyline.
But here’s that pickle I mentioned. I still loved this book. I mean, yeah I put it down/took a breather several different times and was very happy my husband wasn’t around to see the R.B.F. to the nth degree that was occurring as Andrew and Peggy’s relationship evolved, but at the end of the day the blurb was spot-on. This absolutely was “darkly funny� and “lڱ-ڴھԲ� and, despite there being DOZENS of taglines on books out there saying they are “for readers of Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine,� this one might actually fit the bill. I fell in love with Andrew and Peggy and the end result????
4 Stars
ARC provided by NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. Thank you, NetGalley!
Have you ever started a novel and known immediately that it was not for you and yet you kept going? Such was the case with “How Not to Die Alone.�
This novel is about a man named Andrew, who works for the death registry - his main job is to go to the homes of the recently deceased, determine if they have next of kin and/or funds to pay for funeral expenses. If they have no one, he makes sure to attend their funerals. You see, he is alone and has no one, yet he has lied to everyone at his office and has told them that he is married with two children because, in truth he could end up in the same predicament, he could die alone.
Then someone new starts at the registry, her name Peggy. She is married with children (she’s not married to Al, I swear, lol). Their friendship has a profound impact on Andrew and the way he thinks of himself and the world.
Admittedly, this novel was perhaps not the best choice for someone like me, as I am divorced, have no children and don’t have close family (I have the best of friends and I have books thus I am richer than most). That said, this though “How Not to Die Alone� is, at times endearing and quirky, it is also a heavier type read that was hard to shake off. There were no moments where it truly touched my heart or made me smile with utter joy unlike other books in this genre. It just didn’t have that same “feel.� The characters of Andrew and Peggy however both go through a lot of growth throughout the novel and have an incredible amount of believability and depth which was astounding considering this is a debut novel. If you can handle a bit of heavier read, this novel might be for you.
Thank you to Edelweiss, NetGalley, Penguin Group Putnam and Richard Roper for an arc of this novel in exchange for an honest review.
Published on ŷ, Edelweiss and NetGalley on 2.26.19. *Will be published on Amazon on 5.28.19.
This is a fast, chuckle-inducing read with poignant moments of sadness and reflection. Andrew’s job is to go to the homes of the deceased and find out if they have any family and any money to pay for a funeral. Sometimes the bodies have been rotting for months but no one realizes it until the money in the bank runs out and they can no longer pay bills through automatic deductions.
Andrew has lived alone for twenty years. His parents are dead and he is largely estranged from his sister. His entire social life is an online group of model train enthusiasts. But a misunderstanding during his job interview five years ago grew to become a huge lie that he has a wife and kids. He likes the fantasy, but his lies start getting harder to maintain after changes at his office, including befriending the new employee Peggy, who is going through a rough time with her marriage.
This book is a lot of fun. I recommend it. Also, points for originality. Thanks to NetGalley for the opportunity to review this novel, which RELEASES MAY 28, 2019.
Thank you to G.P. Putnam's Sons / Penguin Publishing Group for providing an advance reader copy via Edelweiss.
Andrew is 42, single, lives alone in an apartment in London, and works for the council. He has the unusual task of dealing with the aftermath of people who die alone. Job details include going to the residence armed with a mask doused liberally with expensive cologne to mask the uniquely foul smell of death. Sometimes the dwelling is extremely neat, and other times there is a huge mess to clean up, flies swirling around. He must pore through drawers and paperwork to look for a life insurance policy, cash (often times found under a mattress), next of kin, etc. The goal is to find a means of recovering funeral costs for the deceased. If need be, valuable items in the residence can be sold. Not that it is even required, but Andrew always attends the funeral church service. More often than not, Andrew and the vicar are the only people paying respects to the deceased. Andrew has also been known to shed a tear or two at the pathetic situation.
Andrew created problems for himself when he was first interviewed for the job by his boss Cameron. Andrew's mind was wandering at one point during the interview when Cameron asked a personal question. Faking that he hadn't heard the question, Andrew wound up lying that he was married with two children. Once you start telling a lie it has a way of snowballing into a bigger lie. Eventually, Cameron encourages the staff to take turns at each other's houses getting together for dinner. Andrew is quite stressed at the thought of what he will do when it's his turn to host. He's lied so many times to his co-workers about his make believe wife Diane and their two children that there's no turning back.
Another conflict in the story is his attraction to new employee Peggy who he takes along on house searches to show her the ropes. Peggy has an easy, friendly and funny way about her that is very appealing to Andrew. In addition, Peggy has two young daughters, but is married to an alcoholic.
Andrew loves to listen to Ella Fitzgerald albums and is an avid train set enthusiast. He participates in a chat forum (using a screen name) on the internet for train set hobbyists. When he's upset or lonely, he is calmed by turning on his train track, listening to Ella and chatting on the train forum thread. He suffers from PTSD involving an abusive sister Sally, and reacts horribly whenever he hears the song "Blue Moon" sung by Ella Fitzgerald. It will cause him to run out of a record store, lie face down in bed and scream, etc.
In summation, the character of Andrew reminds me a bit of Eleanor Oliphant in that he is a victim of sibling abuse, lives with resultant mental problems, and maintains a solitary life with simplicity. He's worried about what people will think if he lets them get too close. This wasn't the greatest book I've ever read or the worst either. It was a decent read.
Andrew works for the local council and has an unusual job of identifying if people who lived and died alone had a next of kin. The irony of the situation is that Andrew himself is estranged from his family, single and lives alone, although due to a misunderstanding during the job interview his boss thinks that Andrew has a loving wife and two children. When a new employee Penny joins the department, an unusual friendship is born, which changes the way Andrew views himself and other people. While the subject of the book is not light at all, the way the author deals with the topic is original, thought-provoking, and yes, life-affirming. I feel this is an important book in this day and age when loneliness has become so widespread for a variety of social reasons. I loved Richard Roper's writing style, humour and unusual depth of the characters, both main and secondary. Definitely recommended. Thank you to Edelweiss and Penguin Group Putnam for the ARC provided in exchange for an honest opinion.
Prepare yourself for hilarity and heart-squeezes in this life-affirming novel about—wait for it—death!
Andrew has an unusual job for a civil servant: He goes into the homes of deceased people who lived alone and searches their belongings for clues of any living relatives. He is respectful and sensitive, and the job suits him. Andrew himself lives a quiet life alone—not that his coworkers know that. For five years, due to a small error, he’s allowed them to believe he’s happily married with children.
Now Andrew’s lie has come back to bite him, not only because his boss is suggesting they take turns hosting team-building dinners, but also because of the new employee, Peggy. Peggy is friendly and full of life, and Andrew is falling for her. But if he tells her the truth, will she ever talk to him again? And will his boss fire him if he finds out the truth?
I had no idea what to expect when I started this, and was delighted to discover that not only was it full of humor, but it has so much heart. Roper has done a great job weaving together a story of one man’s loneliness and dreams in the face of mortality. I never found it to be too heavy, despite death playing a large part in the story, and I also found myself wishing that everything, against all odds, would turn out all right for Andrew in the end.
3.5 stars, rounded up It was a comparison to Eleanor Oliphant that hooked me. This is a much darker book and it took a while to engage me. In fact, initially, I thought about giving up on it. It was thanks to some other reviewers saying it got better that convinced me to stay the course. Andrew takes a new job and somehow lies about having a family. Years later and he’s never corrected it. In fact, through the years he’s built on it and everyone in the office thinks he has a wife and two kids. So, when a new person joins the department and they become friends, I wanted to see if he would come clean or would his hand be forced. One of the reviews describes it as offbeat and that’s an apt description. It gets sweeter as the story progresses. And by the end, I was totally invested in Andrew. Simon Vance narrated and I thought he did a good job with both the emotions and the different voices.
I have to admit that the beginning of this novel was a little slow for me. I had a hard time getting into it and I was getting a little bored. However, at around 40% something clicked for me, and I was in love with Andrew’s character. Andrew became this quirky, funny, and unique character that will stay with me for a long while. I truly felt his need for human company, and his desire for having his own family became my own obsession. I wanted him to finally find someone to settle down with and to find his own happiness.
“� to see Peggy rushing towards him like that, for him to be needed, to be an active participant in someone else’s life, to think that maybe he was more than just a lump of carbon being slowly ushered toward an unvarnished coffin; the feeling was one of pure, almost painful happiness, like a desperate embrace squeezing air from his lungs, and it was then that the realization hit him: he might not know what the future held - pain and loneliness and fear might still yet grind him into dust - but simply feeling the possibility that things could change for him was a start, like feeling the first hint of warmth from kindling rubbed together, the first wisp of smoke…�
This book is being compared to and I must say that I do see some similarities. I would even go as far as call Andrew a male equivalent of Eleanor. And who does not love Eleanor?! Maybe this story had a slow start and was a little dull at the beginning but it quickly became one of my favorite feel-good novels to go to: unique, funny, quirky, emotional, heart warming story of how we can find ourselves feeling lonely in this world full of people, and what it takes to finally find our own spot in this crazy and busy world.
Thank you Edelweiss, G. P. Putnam’s Sons, and the author, Richard Roper for giving me an opportunity to read a free copy of this novel in exchange for my honest opinion.
It started out okay but before long I found myself slogging through it. I've given more stars to worse books, but this had great potential and my expectations quickly turned to disappointment. Still, a part of me wanted to know how the story unfolded. Another part of me fought with the aforementioned part of me because I find it very hard to DNF. I began to avoid reading it and that escalated until I began to give the book side eye. But I finished it.
It's all about Andrew and he's not an interesting character and definitely not the clever, sarcastic guy with a touching story I was expecting. It begins with something ludicrous that happened five years ago but is recounted at the beginning. During a job interview, Andrew's mind wanders briefly and he answers "yes" to a question he didn't pay attention to. If only he'd said, "Sorry, I didn't hear that, could you repeat it?" there would be no book. But instead he answers 'yes" and has just told his prospective boss he's a father. Rather than explain something most interviewers would understand, he embellishes and one nonexistent child becomes two, along with a wife and a large, lovely home. And for five years he's lied to his boss and coworkers. Will he be exposed? It begs the question why he ever did it and why he's kept it up, and the answer didn't satisfy me.
Andrew lives in a small, somewhat seedy apartment in London with a room devoted to one of his two interests, and he only has two interests. He loves model trains. He has lots of them along with lots of model train stuff. For years he's spent nights on a subforum with a small group of model train fanatics. His only other interest is Ella Fitzgerald's music. He doesn't listen to anything else. This is a character study of a boring character.
Andrew spends days at his job searching through the belongings of people who died alone at home. I was naive and expected the bodies would still be there. Whatever that says about me, I wanted them to be there. But duh, of course the coroner has had the bodies removed and then in come the council employees paid to go through the deceased's things searching for sources of money to pay for the funerals the council gives them and use any found money to bury them in something other than unmarked graves. They're also looking for wills and for loved ones to contact.
[Please indulge me now as I sort of digress and talk about something that matters a lot to me: Andrew's job was my favorite part of the book. This is because I had no idea that it's a real job. Where I'm from, New York City, it's recently come to light that since the 1800s they've been dumping unclaimed and other bodies on Hart Island, an island no one knew about, where prisoners have been and still do bury them in cheap coffins stacked up in large trenches they dig that comprise mass graves. There are over a million people buried there. And it was kept secret...Thanks to a New York Times expose and follow-up we now know that buried at Hart island are a lot of people who donated their bodies to medical schools never realizing the schools would give them to coroners who sent them to Hart Island. One woman The Times focused on was a multi-millionairess with children and grands who donated her body to science and it's buried on the island in a stack in one of the large trenches. For years her family had no idea she was there and were of course traumatized to find out. It's not an isolated case; medical schools routinely handed the bodies off to the coroners. There are also people who were sent to the coroners from nursing homes and hospitals whose staff didn't bother to check that they had prepaid burial plans. And there are early AIDS victims who, because they died in NYC at the onset of the epidemic are stacked in trenches in a separate section at the other end of the island, as if the dead could infect the dead. Officials don't even have a count of them, but AIDS victims on Hart Island are thought to number in the ten thousands. Because the record-keeping for Hart Island burials was atrocious, the city has been blah blah blah excuses excuses. Most of the people can never be identified. Hart Island holds people with families and other loved ones, many of whom still have no idea their precious ones lie rotting in those trenches along with those unfortunates, lonely and isolated in life, who in death really do have no one to claim them. And it's all because NYC (and perhaps other American cities) didn't bother to do what London, and by extension I hope all England, pays people to do: to care about the dead. All of them. Forgive the digression but millions of us only just learned about this travesty and though the book didn't warm my heart, Andrew's job does.]
There is one fresh, intriguing thing set up early: When Andrew hears"Blue Moon," he freaks out. And when he freaks out, he hears "Blue Moon" playing in his head. I hoped there would be a fascinating reveal why, but no. I expected an aha and got a ho-hum. I'm not heartless but Andrew was as one-dimensional as cardboard and cardboard doesn't move me. Each reveal brought further disappointment and finishing became a chore I kept putting off. If someone knows an online subforum where one can go to get encouragement to DNF a book, please leave a comment with the details.
You might like this book if you enjoy quirky, London-based novels about characters navigating daily life with minor qualms about their decisions and getting into ridiculous scenarios. Andrew, the main character, has an obsession with model trains, works for the city helping with funerals for individuals who die with no relatives to bury them, and has a made-up wife & kids that he uses as a cover for his lonely life amongst his co-workers. It's charming, at times, and a bit silly but also a sweet, if not predictable story of coming to terms with oneself.
You might not like this book if you get easily frustrated with characters' whose problems could have been solved through honesty, or quite simply just owning up to their actions rather than spiraling into a deeper and deeper conundrum.
Personally, I thought it was a fun-enough read that I never wanted to quit it, but it's not one I'll be thinking about forever. The writing, story and characters (the main elements I focus on when thinking about how I will rate and review a story) were all pretty average. I'd never discourage anyone from reading this but won't go raving about it either. If you're in the mood for a light, quick read, then go for it. But if Netflix made this into a 90 minute movie I'd probably rather just watch that.
Ah this book is wonderful! If it’s possible to have a male equivalent of Eleanor Oliphant then Andrew is him! Witty, likeable and so quintessentially British! I loved everything from the quirky job Andrew holds (it had never occurred to me before that this is an actual thing, but in hindsight, of course it is!) to his little white lies which start off innocently enough but continue to escalate. It’s just so well written with that dead pan British humour undertone that makes you smile, despite yourself. A literary triumph.
The Hook - Hmmm, where did this one come from? All I knew about it when I picked it up off my book shelves was that the orange cover and the title attracted me. How soon we forget. Published in 2019, maybe I won it. Maybe I really thought I'd get some tips on how not to die alone. Whatever the reason, I'm glad I picked it up. A fine debut, a winner for me.
The Line - ”And suddenly he was gripped by possibility once again: that as long as there was that movement in someone, then there was the capacity to love.�
The Sinker - �-Chapter 1- Andrew looked at the coffin and tired to remember who was inside it. It was a man-he was sure of that. But, horrifyingly, the name escaped him. He thought he'd narrowed it down to either John or James, but Jake had just made a late bid for consideration. It was inevitable, he supposed, that this had happened. He'd been to so many of these funerals it was bound to at some point, but that didn't stop him from feeling an angry stab of self-loathing.�
Andrew works for a public health agency but one I'd never knew existed but this is the UK. Not certain we have anything to mirror this in the US but I like the concept. Andrew is charged with making certain those that dies alone have no next of kin. He goes through their belongings looking for the smallest clue that might turn up a loved one or friend. Frequently no one is found and Andrew's next task is to arrange the funeral and burial of this lonely soul. That should do the job but Andrew has taken to attending the service as he feels no one should make this journey without a mourner by their side. As soon as the church service is over, Andrew quickly disappears as he has no desire to talk to the funeral directors or the unlikely neighbor that sometimes shows up. Above and beyond.
Andrew often makes reference to the song "Blue Moon", a favorite of mine. I've heard many variations of this, but the one that runs in Andrew's head most often is sung by Ella Fitzgerald. I'd never heard this one, now rectified.
We first learn how Andrew ended up in this position, a career even he was surprised to have. From that first paragraph I quoted we go back five years and get the rest of the story which begins with Andrew being late for an interview, happy ”he hadn't claimed to be “extremely punctual�. The interview does not seem to be going well and Andrew is terribly distracted by the thoughts running through his head. Drawn back by a question he has not heard Andrew answers "۱� and there begins, well, the beginning of what could have been a really sad read, to one that is told with humor, heart, and hope.
It seems to me that I live in a state of eternal conflict when it comes to the books I read. I haven't read a single five-star book in all of 2019. And most of the books I like are books that are equally as interesting as they are flawed.
This was one such but and I don't know how to feel about it.
First, let me just out there that objectively speaking, this is actually a decent, well-written book.
Now let me admit that subjectively speaking, this book was not the one for me.
I don't know what I had expected when I picked up a book about a man whose job revolves around working with dead people, but it wasn't this. This book is a lot darker and heavier than I expected, and not just because of the whole looming topic of life and death, but because the more we delve into the story, the more we find out about our main character Andrew's lonely and tragic past.
Andrew is a little odd when you first meet him. He's likable but strange, the kind of man who invented an entire family in the eyes of his coworkers because he didn't know how to get out of an awkward situation, and then perpetuated the lie because he liked the idea of belonging to a family.
This is not as goofy as it at first seems after we get to see how he was raised with a sick and neglectful more and an equally neglectful and abusive older sister.
The characters in this book are well written and interesting. The writing is quite good. The story itself is thoughtful and enjoyable if you can get into it. Sadly, for the life of me, I couldn't engage with the story!
I was bored. I was distracted. I wanted to dive in and I could barely dip my toe into it and I am genuinely disappointed in myself for it because I think the story deserves a chance.
There have been a lot of people that have really liked this so far and I don't doubt that many more of you will like it as well. I am not one of those people.
Keep in mind that this book deals with many serious topics such as death, abuse, alcoholism and the like.
I don't have much else to say.
I hope you enjoy it if you do get to it.
**I received an ARC of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own.**
So how do you dignify a man’s death who dies reading about buzzards on top of a toilet seat? Well, you show up at his funeral. Afterall that is Andrew’s job.
Kind of. Sort of. Andrew wants to appear as a tenderhearted, thoughtful person who is happily married with two children. But he really isn’t, married with two children, it is a miscommunication he failed to correct to his colleagues and employer.
And we root for Andrew to come clean and connect, as much for his benefit as our entertainment. After all, isn’t that what the title of the book is all about?
But in order to do that, he has to confront the heartbreak that derailed him in the first place.
Andrew’s workplace, the Death Administration, occupies the best place in the novel. He is required to visit people who died alone, look for next of kin and arrange their funerals. What an interesting job, yes?
And the author takes us on a journey with his characters that have the gambit of emotions that readers can feel too � lonely � confused � misguided � bumbling � profoundly bereft.
There is much compassion here. And humor.
Will Andrew come clean with his colleagues? Will he find his happily ever after? Will he be one of those individuals that die alone?
Be patient with this one. You may find you enjoy it after all.
Please don't believe the GR blurb. This is nothing like , besides the fact that both protagonists are loners. That book is laugh out loud funny many many times and this one really isn't. It can be pretty bleak at times, but still I enjoyed it.
This book follows the story of Andrew, who lives in London. He works for the local council and goes to homes of those found dead who don't have close family or friends. He takes care of the burial and notifies next of kin, if any. In the process, he has to come to terms with the fact that he is also a very lonely person, for reasons we discover as the story progresses. His life changes when Peggy is hired to help out in his department and he begins to train her.
As you can imagine, having that job can be pretty bleak, but Andrew has a good heart and wants to see that each person is treated with as much dignity as it's within his power to give. He experiences a lot of growth during the story and, although it's not all hearts and flowers, I really enjoyed it, despite quite a slow start. (I'm glad I didn't abandon it early on, as I was about to. I think switching between paper and audiobook helped, because Simon Vance narrates, and he is one of the best.)
I loved this book from start to finish. This was one of my most anticipated reads of the year and it did NOT let me down. I've finished it in two days and I was kind of sad when I reached the last page. Thank you, Richard Roper for this wonderful and brilliant debut novel. Can't wait to read your next book. Oh, and thanks for making me feel things, for making my heart hurt and for making me cry in public ON A TRAIN.
This book has been compared to Eleanor Oliphant and I wholeheartedly agree with that comparison. Of course, this is an entirely different story with a different setting and very different characters but the vibes were very similiar. I loved Eleanor Oliphant and I love this book as well. It's funny and endearing, but heartbreaking and surprisingly wise. I fell in love with Andrew and Peggy but I'm really glad this is more than just another love story. It's much deeper than that. It's poignant and moving at the same time, the concept of their job both horrifying and wonderful. It's a cry for help, it carries a message that must not be overlooked: there are so many lonely people out there. Maybe we should all look to our family members, friends, neighbours and colleagues to make sure they're okay. That they've got someone to love in their lives. Someone to talk to. And if they don't... then maybe we should help them to make their life a little less loneley.
I applaud you, mr Roper. This is a great, wonderful debut and it definitely deserves more recognition and love than it's getting right now.
The first time I picked up How Not To Die Alone, I simply was not in the right frame of mind to read it, constantly comparing it Eleanor Oliphant. So I sat it aside to come back to. This time, however, I was in the right place and found the book to be utterly charming, hope-filled and quite wonderful!
Andrew is a loner - well, that's actually an understatement - who works for the Estate Council tracking down possible relatives of people who have died alone. There is the question of who buries them, you see. His life is grim, his flat is grim, everything about Andrew is grim. So bad, in fact, that he has created a fake wife and family so others will not feel sorry for him. But the Peggy joins their office, an office filled with quirky and unusual people, and Andrew finds his life changing in unexpected ways.
The characters of How Not To Die Alone are some of the most realistic characters I've come across in a while. While they each are unlikable in their own right, I soon found that I cared about them despite their flaws which is, after all, what life is all about. As Andrew's perspective changes, we see so much hope inside of him. He's caring, thoughtful and quite marvelous. By the end of the book, as we finally learn what has happened in his past, you are cheering him on and hoping for the very best for him.
Yes, the story is similar to other books of this nature, but it is the characters who set this one apart from the others. You will love them, hate them, cry for them and, in the end, be so happy for them all. We, as human, grow and change and morph over the course of our lifetimes and, if we're lucky, we won't find ourselves alone in the end.
Please note that I received this book via NetGalley. This did not affect my rating or review.
So, this was a thought provoking and sobering at times read. I did laugh a few times, but a few times while finishing I thought to myself will I die alone and if I do, will anyone be left after to miss me and come round to check in on me.
My family does a very good job of staying in touch with each other. We do Polos (videos) everyday almost to each other. We also text and sent pictures. When I go home to visit my family I stop in on older relatives who are content for me to sit and watch them watch television (mostly Lifetime). It just never occurred to me to not see them and check in on them.
This book shows us another side of those people who either lost loved ones, or didn't have any with them in the end. I ended up loving Andrew for just making sure that someone besides the local vicar was there to see them off. Roper does a great job with slowly revealing Andrew's story. You will have a lot of sympathy for him. And I also love that he didn't have Andrew just have a happily ever after romance wise. Honestly, I would have been happier without the romance. Between that and the flow of the book being off here and there, I ended up giving this book four stars.
"How Not to Die Alone" follows Andrew. Andrew works for public works and specifically gets involved when someone is found dead and it appears there are no next of kin to be found. Andrew seems to have a routine down pat. He goes to work, investigates a house, goes to a funeral if planned, comes home and talks in a chatroom with other model train enthusiasts, and talks to himself as he eats. We know he has a sister that he talks to once a quarter, and other than that he is trudging through his days. Until the day it comes about that Andrew who told a lie (he is happily married to a woman named Diane and they have two kids) which may get found out. With a new coworker named Peggy starting to push Andrew out of his rut, he is starting to realize why and how his life got so off unbalanced.
I really enjoyed the character of Andrew. You at first may find him weird. Readers are told pretty much up front how he came to lie about being married and you may find yourself not feeling sympathetic to him. I maybe had my eyebrows raised through that part of the book because I just thought how odd it was. However, it takes almost until the end of the book for Roper to reveal why Andrew lied and specifically what happened to him. You then realize why Andrew has become so focused on making sure that the deceased are not left alone at their funerals. That someone should be there to mark them leaving the world. You find out why he loves Ella Fitzgerald so much, but why one song causes him almost physical pain.
Now onto the slightly negative. I didn't really care for the whole romance he had going on in his head with regards to Peggy. I liked how Roper developed their relationship from coworkers, to friends, to amateur sleuths when tracking down leads on possible kin to deceased men and women. However, Peggy has her own marriage and problems to deal with and I hard cringed at Roper possibly throwing the character development of both characters out the window to slap a bow on things. I was so happy to see I was wrong with that, no spoilers, but I loved how well done this was and how it was taken care of by Roper.
The other characters in this book, Andrew's sister (Sally), Sally's shitty boyfriend (Carl), and the frightful coworkers (Keith and Meredith) were written very well. We get a slow reveal about Sally and Andrew's relationship and I felt so sad about the whole thing. No spoilers, but when you read about how they were raised, what happens after, and why they seem so apart from each other's lives it all makes sense.
I already mentioned Peggy above, but she was written so well. Peggy has her own problems, but she does want to help Andrew when she realizes what is going on with him.
The writing was very good. I would also caution reading this while eating or anything. Some of the descriptions of the homes that Andrew and Peggy walk into turned my stomach a bit. FYI, I am a very clean person, I promptly went and cleaned my bathrooms after finishing this book. There is some dialogue that made me laugh here and there, but I loved how Roper shows Andrew's awkwardness and you are able to get the sense that he wants to make connections, but is out of practice.
The flow as I said was not consistent throughout. I think when Roper reveals things about Andrew's past it kind of brings the book to a halt. The passages concerning Sally, Andrew's mother, and what happened to Andrew after going to university were great, and I definitely don't think it should have been told in a chronological way. It just caused the book to grind slightly at times. And the book then moving back to the present didn't work for me all the time since a few times since I would get focused on what Roper revealed and wanted to go back and get more details on that.
The setting of this book takes place in London. It just feels like a London where the lights have gone out a bit. Though there is humor in the book here and there, it's a pretty grim subject matter at times. This book did make me curious about whether in the U.S. if we have a similar office going around taking care of unaccompanied deaths and ensuring the deceased are given a funeral and buried.
The ending though is a breath of fresh air. It will definitely warm your heart.
Šuos knygos atsiradimo priešistorė intriguoja. Autoriui knygos idėja gimė perskaičius straipsnį apie žmones, kurių darbas rūpintis laidotuvėmis tų, kuriais nebesirūpina niekas. Dažniausiai tai vieniši žmonės, kurie dėl vienokių ar kutokių priežasčių neturi artimųjų. Autoriui šis straipsnis sukėlė daugybę minčių ir jausmų. Taip gimė knygos idėja.
“Dėl to verta gyventi� pasakojama vidutinio anžiaus vyro Endriaus gyvenimo istorija. Šis vyras atrodo ganėtinai nuobodus. Dirba municipaliteti tarnyboje, neišsiskiria nei savo išvaizda nei pomėgiais. Bet yra pora “bet�. Vienas jų - vyro darbas . Endriaus pareiga mirusių vienišių namuose surasti tapatybės dikumentus ir artimuosius, kurie pasirūpins velionio laidotuvėmis. Jei tokių neatsiranda - tuo pasirūpina jis pats. Antras įdomus dalykas - neurotiškas ir intravertiškas vtras netyčia apsimelavo darbe, kad turi fantastiškus namus, žmoną ir porelę vaikų. Viskas taip ir liktų jo sąžinės reikalu jei ne nauja kolegė Pegė. Vyras jaučia jai simpatija, o jo įsivaizduojama šeima trukdo tuos santykius plėtoti toliau. Endrius atsiduria kryžkelėje - ar rizikuoti darbu ir visiems atskleisti tiesą ar meluoti toliau, bet tuomet Pegę tektų pamiršti.
Tai yra unikali knyga. Labai įdomus priėjimas prie mirties, vienišumo temų. Tikrai tarp milijonų išleidžiamų knygų pasaulyje autoriaus pasirinktas kelias išsiskiria. Turiu paminėti, kad originalus knygos pavadinimas “How not to die alone� man pasirodė daug labiau atspindintis temą ir knygos turinį. Bandymas surasti mirusių artimuosius, nepalikti jų vienų pasikutonėje kelionėje labai gražiai susipina su pagrindinio veikėjo ieškojimais ir baime likti vienam. Manau ši vienišumo tema yoač aktuali šiuo metu, kad dauguma mūsų panirę virtualiame bendravime, įsivaizduojamuose, o ne realybėje puoselėjamuose santykiuose, kai susvetimėjimo jausmas itin aštrus.
Itin stiprus pasirodė pagrindinio veikėjo personažas. Jo neurotiškumas bei intravertiškumas atskleistas puikiai. Taip pat kiek su šypsena galime, manau, kiekvienas beskaitydami rasti to savojo Endriaus mumyse kiekviename. Knygos nugarėlė žada linksmą istoriją, bet aš labiau įžvelgiu ramumą, melancholiją, šiek tiek slogučio ir vilties blyksnius.
Kam skaityti? Tiems, kas nori jautrios ir nepaviršutiniškos istorijos apie gyvenimą, vienišumą ir viltį. Originalus priėjimas prie temos ir knyga, kuri mano minčių dar ilgai nepaliks.
I will be the first to admit that this book had an abundance of lessons hidden within its pages. The facets of hope for a better future, the idea that love can conquer loneliness, and the importance of having someone, anyone to turn to in times of need were readily apparent. With this said, this book was somewhat...well...boring. I found this book to be one of those reads that while a quick look into the fabric of mankind in itself is not overwhelmingly memorable. I did enjoy this book, but I will admit that I didn't love it.
Andrew is a man who finds himself between a rock and a hard place when a misunderstanding makes his single life, filled with previous tragedy of a lost love, a thing only he knows. Everyone at his job thinks he is happily married with a wife and two kids, living the proverbial "perfect" life with family fights, family memories, and love shared in abundance. What they don't realize is that Andrew is and has been perpetually single for over 20 years. He has no wife, no kids, and in fact no friends except his friends in his model train discussion group. He is seemingly alone which is why loneliness is painted as an instrumental theme within this novel. He, of course, falls in love with the new woman at his work who thinks he is married as well.
Peggy was, to me, definitely the best part of this novel. A strong woman with even stronger convictions, Peggy knows what she wants and goes after it. She isn't afraid to get her hands dirty or show vulnerability which made me love her. She is the comedic relief within this novel, a necessary aspect when dealing with the heavy themes of depression, loneliness, lost love, and death. Andrew's job itself revolves around death and dying, so the use of Peggy acts a foil for the dreary mood of these parts of the book. I believe the author did a fantastic job in incorporating her into the novel. With this said, I felt that I couldn't root for Peggy and Andrew to get together completely because she was indeed still married to her (absolutely awful, alcoholic, mean-hearted) husband. I feel as though her character was not the type to cheat, so I could not root for them completely. Did I want them together in theory? Heck yes. Did I expect them to get together? Honestly no. I guess what I can say is that incorporating a character such as Peggy, while ticking off the box for a romantic interest, doesn't really resolve these ideas of loneliness that the author perpetrated in the description of his novel. I, however, loved Peggy's character for who she was as a person even if I couldn't root for her and Andrew completely. I can only hope that after the divorce they find a way to be together. I feel as though both Andrew and Peggy deserve the happiness they could bring each other, so I feel better saying that the future is a definitive possibility for them.
While this book does deal with the sad aspects of death, suicide, loneliness, and lost love, it also has a semblance of hope as well. There are many individuals on this planet who do die alone or who die without being with the person they thought they would spend the rest of their life with. This is a sad yet true statement within the world we live in. What this story portrayed was that even if life isn't necessarily a smooth, straight path, sometimes there are ways to find hope in the darkest moments. The back of this book says "Sometimes you need to risk everything...to find your something." I feel as though this was put to draw a correlation with the romantic facets of the story, but I think this story is much deeper than that. I think an individual's "something" can be their job that they love and the way it affects others. I think a "something" could be the most best-est chocolate chip cookies in the whole wide-er-est world that help bring others together. I think someone's "something" could be having the strength, the determination, the independence to live peacefully on one's own with friends but not necessarily lovers. I think the author could have shown this more clearly because every time I thought Andrew was going to create himself into an independent, strong-willed man, he seemed to rely on love whether it be Peggy's or Diane's love. I think love is important (I'm a hopeless romantic, so I always will!!!), but I also think loneliness, pain, and emotion are sometimes things that can only be dealt with personally. These emotions are not felt by a LACK of someone but are felt because an individual chooses to focus on this lack.
I know it seems that I am dissecting this book to the extreme, but I will say that I did enjoy the ending of this book. The idea of Andrew choosing to find a new place to live, start working at the charity Peggy thought of, and basically restart his life in an effort to grow as a human is something I believe people often have to do. It shows he was human in that he was willing to try again. I thought the charity idea was beautifully done as well, so that part just made me happy, to be honest. I think it showed the empathy, emotional maturity, and love that Andrew was developing for others but most importantly for himself. It was towards the end that I saw development in Andrew. While there were glimpses of it throughout the novel, it was only at the end that I was fully convinced he would change for the better.
Overall, I think this was an okay book. While I did enjoy parts of it (Peggy and Beryl were fantastic characters, and I did want Andrew to be happy in the end.), I also felt like the majority of the novel I was just reading rather absently. I hate to say that I was somewhat bored, but I felt that perhaps I was at times. With this said, for this to be Richard Roper's debut, I think he created a story worthy of being told. Maybe I just wasn't quite the right reader for it to be a 5 star read. As a book that deals with loneliness, love, and hope, I believe it can be a good read. I just don't think it is the best, and that's okay.
How Not To Die Alone (also titled Something To Live For) is the first novel by British author, Richard Roper. Andrew Smith works for the council. It’s not a job people line up to do: he searches the dwellings of the solitary recently-deceased to discover if there might be family or funds to cover the funeral that the council is otherwise obliged to provide.
His department, Death Administrations, is a small one and his boss, Cameron Yates has the sort of fervour that makes people cringe (picture a benign version of David Brent from The Office). Meetings in the “break-out space� are greeted with “the enthusiasm a chicken might if it were asked to wear a prosciutto bikini and run into a fox's den.� His other colleagues, except for their newest staff member, Peggy Green, are definitely less than gracious.
On Peggy’s first day, Andrew takes her to a property inspection; later, as she is recovering with a Guinness in the pub, he confesses that he goes to their funerals if no-one else is likely to: “The idea that they'd not have someone to be with them at the end, to acknowledge that they'd been a person in the world who'd suffered and loved and all the rest of it - he just couldn't bear the thought of it.�
Andrew lives in a four-bedroom townhouse near Dulwich with his lawyer wife, Diane and his children, Steph and David. At least, this is the accidental fiction he has somehow perpetuated at work to give him a “normal� image. Andrew actually lives alone in a dingy flat with his model trains and his Ella Fitzgerald records. The only people he might venture to call friends, he’s never met in real life: they are the people who post on the model train forum.
Despite the absence of remains, their job is often an unpleasant one requiring, in addition to a strong stomach, sensitivity, diplomacy and respect. Working with Peggy turns out to be a pleasure, and Andrew wonders if, for the first time in his life, he might make a real friend. Of course, the problem with that is he’d have to tell her the truth about his life, although Cameron’s latest team-bonding brainwave may make it a moot point, when it will be Andrew’s turn to host his colleagues at dinner.
Roper’s first novel is a wonderfully heart-warming and uplifting tale: if there’s no Hollywood ending, there’s the chance of something like one. Readers are likely to recognise one or more of Roper’s characters from everyday life: he gives them insightful observations and wise words; and the underlying themes of maintaining connection and living life to the full are worthy ones.
The comparison to Eleanor Oliphant is quite valid as this novel also has a protagonist living a dysfunctional life as a result of earlier traumatic events, even if Andrew's social ineptitude is less severe than Eleanor's; certainly, his sense of empathy is more refined.
There's plenty of humour both in the dialogue and Andrew's inner monologue but there are also some lump-in-the-throat moments as he gradually shares more of the heart-breaking details of his adolescence and early adulthood. This is an outstanding debut novel and more from this talented author will be most welcome.
This novel is something both unusual and moving. We meet the main character, Andrew, at the funeral of an elderly man he didn’t know. For Andrew works for, ‘Death Administration,� at the Council offices. In general terms, the department he works for, deals with, what were once known as, ‘Pauper’s Funerals.� When someone dies alone, it is Andrew’s job to go into their home and attempt to locate enough money to pay for their unmarked grave, and, if possible, find contact details of a relative.
Andrew is forty two and his own family is a sister he rarely sees. After starting his job, he finds himself accidentally falling into a lie, which leads to his inventing a wife, and two children. In reality, he lives alone � his only friends the members of an online forum, who � like him � obsess about model railways. However, Andrew’s life is about to change with the arrival of new member, Peggy Green and the threat of his boss, Cameron Yates, that the members of his department, gloriously unwilling to participate, host dinners in a form of mortifying team bonding. Even more concerning for Andrew is that, rather than lawyer wife, Diane, and a large house, the members of his team � including unpleasant colleagues, Keith and Meredith � will be climbing the stairs to his dingy bedsit�
I really liked Andrew. Middle aged, quiet, and lonely; he is an unusual hero. As the novel progresses, and everything I have mentioned above, happens in the first couple of chapters, we learn why Andrew is living his isolated, rather unhappy, life. However, although this novel deals with difficult, and often sad, themes, it does so with humour and intelligence. Some of the scenes in this novel are so full of embarrassment, you can hardly read on, but you want to know what will happen to Andrew. Stuck in a tragic job, with unsympathetic colleagues and a well-intentioned boss, whose ideas are always unwelcome � who does enjoy team bonding exercises anyway?!
This would be ideal for reading groups, as there is much to discuss. I received a copy of this book from the publisher, via NetGalley, for review.
This book just wasn’t for me. I read it because a friend loaned it to me, and it sat on my shelf for months, and it was time. But I barely made it through.
This book is sad. There is no other way to describe it. It starts sad, there are many (many) sad parts, and then it ends. Although there is largely resolution, I still finished the book feeling overwhelmingly sad. The main character seems to make odd decisions, which the reader realizes are actually heartbreaking as his past is revealed.
Overall, this book is well written, but I couldn’t get past the serious nature of the book. There are numerous mentions of death (including suicidal ideation), which I suppose I should have gathered from the title. Ultimately I gave this book two stars, but will need to read something more lighthearted asap.
**please refer to a trusted source for a full list of trigger warnings.
This has been touted as the male equivalent of , and coincidentally, I gave that a measly 2.5 stars also, and for much the same reasons. There is nothing inherently BAD here, but nothing very scintillating either. The prose is pedestrian, at best, and although there are a few droll witticisms sprinkled throughout, it is rarely LOL funny. I was never much invested in Andrew's predicament, and the conclusion (a bit gloopy for my taste, as is its progenitor) was self-evident from the start. And maybe it was me, but I never QUITE grasped what the problem was between Andrew and his sister Sally - nor why BOTH seemed to feel guilty about the other. And for a relatively short book, it took me rather a long time to plod through it, never a good sign, IMHO. To be honest, the cover illustration is the best part of the book - even though the character bears no resemblance to Andrew as he's described in the book...