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Things I Learned from Falling

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In 2018, writer Claire Nelson made international headlines when she fell over 25 feet after wandering off the trail in a deserted corner of Joshua Tree. The fall shattered her pelvis, rendering her completely immobile. There Claire lay for the next four days, surrounded by boulders that muffled her cries for help, but exposed her to the relentless California sun above. Her rescuers had not expected to find her alive.

In THINGS I LEARNED FROM FALLING Claire tells not only her story of surviving, but also her story of falling. What led this successful thirty-something to a desert trail on the other side of the globe from her home where no one knew she would be that day? At once the unbelievable story of an impossible event, and the human journey of a young woman wrestling with the agitation of past and anxiety of future.

272 pages, Hardcover

First published October 6, 2020

291 people are currently reading
9,250 people want to read

About the author

Claire Nelson

1Ìýbook52Ìýfollowers
Claire Nelson is a New-Zealand-born writer living in London who has spent more than a decade in travel and food journalism. She spent a year living in Vancouver, Canada, where she wrote her first book, Things I Learned From Falling.

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5 stars
1,893 (35%)
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2,190 (41%)
3 stars
1,022 (19%)
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 529 reviews
Profile Image for Jenny Lawson.
AuthorÌý6 books19.4k followers
February 8, 2021
I skipped over a bit of the pre-fall stuff because I was too worried to focus on anything other than her survival story, which was INSANE.
Profile Image for Janna.
95 reviews33 followers
September 15, 2021
What are we looking for when we listen to stories about survival? The fact the author wrote it is kind of a spoiler that they lived to tell the tale, right? So is it our fascination with physical extremes and toughness, or is it something else? I used to be an avid reader of survival stories and memoirs, so I’ve noticed they follow a thematic arc of either personal hubris or naïveté, followed by disbelief, frustration, despair, and then, typically, the acceptance of death before a big rescue or escape.

What does publisher promotion leave OFF the promo/cover? Nelson didn’t tell anyone she was going hiking in the desert, and although she had her cell phone, she didn’t have a source of backup coverage. For me, the burning question was NOT how she survived, but why did she put herself into that predicament to begin with?

After you’ve read a few dozen stories about survival, the details start to blend together, and the process of physical deterioration becomes repetitive and predictable. I mention this because many Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ reviewers note that they skipped over the backstory parts of the book because they were riveted by Nelson’s play by play moments lying in the canyon hoping for a rescue. I did the exact opposite, skimming over Nelson’s time in the canyon by listening to these sections on a faster speed and then slowing down for the backstory, striving to understand what sort of person doesn’t tell anyone she’s going hiking in the desert. Nelson’s personal explanation didn’t hold together for me; she chalks it up to her fierce independence, and glosses over darker aspects of her personality.

Critically, before I began listening to Nelson’s account, her ordeal reminded me of Aron Ralston, who, at the age of 27, became trapped during a solo descent of Bluejohn Canyon in southeastern Utah in 2003. After five days, he had to break his forearm to amputate it with a dull pocketknife to break free. Full disclosure, I had to look up Ralston’s name, but the self amputation detail was impossible to forget. Just like Nelson, Ralston never informed anyone of his hiking plans, nor did he have any way to call for help after becoming trapped. Nelson and Ralston both resorted to drinking their own urine to mitigate dehydration, and both published survivor accounts and enjoyed time in the media spotlight, with Ralston’s story made into a movie starring James Franco.

Because of these similarities, I had the uncomfortable feeling that Nelson’s story fits a little too neatly into what we expect of a survival memoir. There were fraught passages about the terror of death whilst reflecting on past mistakes. The hubris of rugged individualists. The physical vulnerability and suffering etched in graphic detail. And the profound regret at having wasted time on the internet instead of overcoming one’s fears is tailor made for a Ted Talk with Brené Brown or the like.

But here’s my problem: I couldn’t shake the feeling that something vital was missing in these lessons learned from falling, even as I neared the end of this audiobook. I can’t help but wonder, if Nelson was such an experienced hiker AND a writer, how does she manage to avoid Aron Ralston’s infamous story for nearly 20 years? OR, is she ashamed to admit she didn’t think what happened to Ralston applied to her? It’s a strange disconnect, considering that Ralston’s story was wildly popular, and certainly impossible to avoid if you worked in the media. Even if you don’t remember his name, like me, you probably recall the story of a man who cut off his own arm after getting trapped alone on a hike.

The best explanation of Nelson’s disconnect I can find is traced directly to her mother’s words. After seeing Nelson incapacitated in the hospital with tears streaming down her face, having survived this horrific ordeal, her mother says, “tears are emotions escaping�, which Nelson seems to find endearing, yet I interpret as an extreme level of emotional repression that spans at least both Nelson and her mother’s lifetimes. This is desperately sad, but it helps unlock Nelson’s emotional framework: her admitted tendency to avoid deep relationships, never ask for help or show vulnerability, move vast distances to escape feelings of loneliness, and may even explain her career preference for writing about food and travel, since this only requires the most superficial emotions.

Emotional repression would also explain Nelson’s stilted, limited vocabulary throughout this book. I had to repeatedly remind myself that Nelson wrote this in her thirties, not her late teens or twenties, because her tone reflects deep seated emotional inhibitions and a lack of self-awareness or connection to others. I cringed and visibly grimaced when I listened to her account of returning to Joshua Tree Park, determined not to live in fear of the desert, “properly crying, like a lunatic.� Even after surviving this ordeal, this crude attempt to distance from emotion with humour seems remarkably lacking in self compassion.

Stylist magazine calls this story uplifting and brave, but I find it deeply tragic and disturbing. How has Nelson truly gained insight about herself, let along changed her ways, other than making a list of safety tips before hiking alone? Nelson continues to express her love directly for objects, including her hiking boots, rather than for relationships or people, right up to the end of this book. I see scant evidence of emotional growth, even after re-listening to much of this audiobook. Instead, I see a carefully constructed facade of plucky, carefree individualism that might as well be a recipe for long term loneliness.

So my question remains: what are we looking for when we pick up survival memoirs? The truth is, that physical survival doesn’t necessarily translate into emotional resilience, which ultimately proves more important after the initial trauma, no matter how messy and imperfect. Aron Ralston’s Wikipedia page hints that survivor stories are not an upward trajectory of unmitigated triumph. He admits that surviving being trapped in the canyon gave him a sense of invincibility, at a time that it should have humbled him. He lost friends to suicide, and had a series of failed or troubled relationships, including an assault charge, although that was later dropped.

For me, the worst tragedy is not to die, but to survive a crushing ordeal, only to live as before, emotionally superficial and finding connection primarily through moments of “talking nonsense� and “dumb-assery and fun�, in Nelson’s words, rather than relationships that dig a bit deeper, and communication that risks emotional vulnerability and honesty. Read in that context, this cautionary tale is darkly compelling.

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Profile Image for Bonnie DeMoss.
909 reviews166 followers
May 7, 2021
Claire Nelson found herself critically injured and hidden from view after a fall while hiking in Joshua Tree National Park, California. This is the story of how she survived.

Claire tells a gripping tale of her life before the accident, the grueling four days she spent alone in the desert, unable to move, and her ultimate rescue and survival. It is a great read that I could not put down. I would recommend this to anyone interested in tales of harrowing, death-defying experiences.

I received a free copy of this book from the publishers via Netgalley. My review is voluntary.
Profile Image for Naomi.
84 reviews
November 12, 2022
Was craving more details about the actual survival, rather than her backstory.
Profile Image for Tanja Berg.
2,186 reviews530 followers
May 25, 2021
I found this book on Jenny Lawson's read shelf. I am so glad I did, because I enjoyed this harrowing tale from start to finish. First her depression and looking for meaning, then her accident that left her within an inch of her death and really reignited her will to live. I can very, strongly relate Claire's sense of despair and being cut-off from the world, despite apparently living a very successful life. The pressure to only reveal the pretty parts of life can be extreme. Surviving four days alone in the desert, with a broken pelvis - that requires a lot. Claire doesn't sugar coat the experience. I enjoyed this a great deal and warmly recommend it to anyone who is looking for a new path through life. It was a super quick and invigorating read, leaving me wanting more.
Profile Image for Briony.
26 reviews9 followers
April 3, 2020
I didn't read this book in the order it's written because by the end of "Day One: Tuesday" I couldn't resist the temptation to jump ahead to the Friday to read about how she got found. I mean, I obviously knew that she got found but I just wanted the reassurance of her being discovered. I then read to the end, and then jumped back in at Day Two: Wednesday and read it from there.

This is such a gripping read and I felt like there was a lot about Claire that made me think of myself, so I found it particularly harrowing. Especially when she talks about never relying on others for help and being stubborn... yup, that's me.

I loved this book. The flashbacks to her life before Joshua Tree were so interesting and insightful. I loved how to she talked about the different people in her life and their relationships. This is a book I'll definitely read again. Especially in light of coronavirus, this was the positive, transformational book I needed.
Profile Image for Risa.
171 reviews8 followers
September 8, 2021

This made me teary AF.

I cannot put into words just how beautiful this book was. I enjoyed every page, every word.

Claire Nelson, this was incredible and you are truly inspiring as a writer and human being.
Profile Image for Sian Lile-Pastore.
1,400 reviews176 followers
May 16, 2020
Man, this was tense!
This was such an inspiring story and i thought there were some really touching moments especially towards the end of her time where shes fallen and she feels like she is probably facing death. She is also really resourceful and brave and i loved her attitude and self awareness.
Profile Image for linse.
66 reviews3 followers
November 3, 2022
"because that's what it is: not only to exist but to live" (253)
▪︎•▪�
"Standing here, it would be easy to think it had all been some peculiar dream.
But I had never been more awake." (250)



aaaaaaaand my personal favourite quote:
"Ooh, cashews, the limousine of nuts"
Profile Image for Cat.
39 reviews12 followers
March 20, 2020
I cried, felt seen AND called out, and laughed along the way. Nelson, your courage, endurance, and self-reflection are phenomenal. I salute you. This was so warm and inspiring.
Profile Image for Celeste Velocci (bookrecs_by_celeste).
309 reviews84 followers
Read
November 22, 2024
What an incredible and powerful memoir. I love listening to memoirs and hearing the author tell their story and experiences. This memoir was about the life of Claire Nelson a woman who fell while hiking and was trapped in the outdoors for multiple days until she was thankfully rescued. This book teaches you that sometimes bad things happen to us so we can be taught a specific lesson about life or that we need to learn something about ourselves that would not come to fruition without certain roadblocks.

A lot of the quotes and words of Claire's journey resonated with me and I think anyone no matter if you have gotten a curveball thrown at you in life or not will benefit from this book.
345 reviews7 followers
April 13, 2025
This story is full of potential but it didn’t feel complete. There were a few pops of brilliance and some interesting sections. But there is too much repetition of vague anxiety/depression/fear in the “London� chapters. These were met with no new insights and were interspersed in the real-time events in a haphazard way that does nothing to move the story along.
The rave reviews baffle me. This is not particularly well-written (grammar or story) and that is especially disappointing given Claire Nelson is a professional food writer.

It is also frustrating that she seemed to learn nothing from the experience - nothing about hiking responsibly or emotional growth and gratitude. Going back with a flask of whiskey (Nelson) and vodka (one of her friends) seems to highlight that lack of awareness (and self-awareness) as no words ever could. Doing shots in the desert, while hiking on a newly healed pelvis sounds like a spring break idea not something a grown-up should view as emotionally sound behavior.
Profile Image for Malola.
639 reviews
January 4, 2024
The first half was good but not superb. She talked too much about her depression and her inability to be vulnerable, but that feels like a post-injure resignifying of what happened during that time. Plus, I didn't see the point of that... What does it really have to do with her falling or what she learnt from that? I guess this being a biography some detail of who she is as a person matters (and the kind of slight arrogance that one might have to make some of the decisions she made*), but I felt it was too disconnected from her main story. IDK... It reads too much as "First World Problems" combined with "White Middle-Class Women's Issues"... As much as it was a sad and overwhelming experience for her, it just sounded too privileged, and, well... conceited. (I don't think she is capricious and spoiled. I just think she wanted to be honest about how she was feeling and how she couldn't avoid feeling the way she felt. Yet it sounded too privileged since she wasn't really going through heartache caused by grief. Then again, with regards to feelings... we just have them. Sometimes they don't even make much sense, yet they are there, and we have to deal with them.)

The second part -particularly Friday, when she got rescued- was really good. One cannot help but feel for her. H3ll, I was squirming while I was reading her reluctance to be moved (and I couldn't help but remembering my own fragility while convalescent due to my own medical issues) first by the paramedics on top of the gurney and later the nurses to clean her back...
Her friends and family stood like rocks, and, for sure, sometimes it's that net of support that keeps one from not losing their mind.
I'm surprised she didn't mention much about PTSD. I felt she wanted to end the book on a high note (albeit not the most honest one), particularly given how she talked about her depression in the first part of the book... but maybe I'm wrong. Perhaps the elation of knowing she survived has helped her to understand and reconcile herself with her trauma.
Kudos to her for visiting the place of the accident. Better face your demons in a controlled environment than not.

______
*I want to be clear that I don't believe she's dumb nor arrogant. I just think she showed some mild arrogance (pride?) while hiking, not above and beyond (actually, I'd say "typical") of someone who has become too comfortable with some behaviours and hobbies that are, well, risky... let alone when they become part of your identity, so you sort of get accustomed to doing them to the point that some yellow flags (let's not say red) get shrugged off because you're rather confident about your level, your youth and your overall experience.
H3ll, I've definitely done stupider decisions than hers while hiking and hitch-hiking, so I'm not judging. I mostly think this because her decisions weren't really that dumb. I mean, not really. She just didn't think she'll get into an accident. Who would, anyway?

For what it's worth, Miss Nelson, I'll be following your advice on bringing with me a whistle and a mirror everywhere I go. She's right: You're overprepared until you're not.
Profile Image for Leah K.
743 reviews2 followers
January 29, 2025
If Claire Nelson knows one thing about herself, it's that she loves her independence, refusing help for most anything. This concept works well until, while on a hike, she goes off trail, slips, crushes her pelvis, and is stuck in crevice...and she didn't tell anyone she was going on a hike or where (the desert). And this book follows that 4 day struggle to survive while she just hopes that someone will find her.

This was a fascinating book. I had never heard of the woman (article posted at bottom of review) and, boy, was she lucky and also resourceful (in some gross ways but hey, you do what he gotta do). This book taught me to never hike....just kidding. But it did teach me the importance of planning and that it's ok to rely on a person or two. Even though I knew she survived (she reads the audiobook, after all) there were a lot of sit-on-the-edge-of-your-seat moments. It was quite well written and even kept my 10 year entranced from beginning to end.

Profile Image for Isobella Carlyle.
4 reviews
May 21, 2024
Gripping read, finished it within 24 hours. More than just a book about an accident. Inspiring story about finding her place in the world through depression.
Profile Image for Kara Messner.
99 reviews1 follower
October 25, 2021
Wow! What a great surprise! I ran into the library killing time and browsed the book section I usually check out to see if anything jumped out at me. I saw this one, read the back and saw it was a a Memoir and was intrigued. I could not put this down!!! The author uses a lot of the F word in her storytelling, so putting that out there, but I think you will be hooked from page one like me. The book is broken down by days that she was lost and injured on a solo hike. The last chapter is just called ‘recovery�. It’s a quick 250 some odd page book and I read it in one day. What a wild account of this woman’s experience. Go read it!
Profile Image for Claire.
310 reviews3 followers
October 31, 2022
I think I may have OD’d on female adventure books� I’m find the predominant narrative for women in the outdoors is getting over some sort of life trauma and you can’t possibly write a book as a woman unless this is the case. I found the story of surviving the 4 days really interesting but the living in london depression loneliness just irritating. I listened to this with my eyes rolling thinking about another one of these stories so I sped up to 2.5 speed to get it over and done with.

The upshot of the lessons learned from falling is that friends and the small thing are the most important things in life which feels as insightful as a primary school book.
Profile Image for Gordon.
103 reviews
March 31, 2020
Life changing

I have never survived a near death experience, yet so much of what is described and considered rings true, and will do for many. Part wilderness survival thriller, part introspective self-help for the current generation, this wonderful book has given me a lot to think about, and I feel better for it.
Profile Image for calico Rosenberg.
86 reviews3 followers
November 10, 2023
Eh

The majority of this is basic life sentiments of the author, and they are kind of drawn out, at that. Most of it reads like a struggle to add length , to me. Which isn't to say these thoughts aren't valid or important., but its not the most interesting read ( I did enjoy the rescue, though)
Profile Image for Samantha Harding.
51 reviews
May 4, 2022
Love me a good survival story. Always so captivating and surreal. This one had some mental health stuff woven in too which was neat.
Profile Image for Els.
1,316 reviews108 followers
April 25, 2023
Dingen die ik leerde van het vallen. Door: Claire Nelson.

Big fan van Maggie Nelson en vanaf nu ook van Claire Nelson.

Dit boek bleef maar voorbijkomen; de cover sprak me aan, en het verhaal ook wel maar ik durfde het niet lezen (ik vreesde kommer en kwel). Blij dat ik het uiteindelijk toch deed. Wat een verhaal, wat een boek!

In 2018 valt journaliste Claire Nelson 6 meter van een rots naar beneden. Ze is heel alleen op pad, verdwaald, op een plek waar haar gsm geen bereik heeft. Door de val verbrijzelt ze haar bekken. Uiteindelijk overleeft ze vier dagen in de woestijn. Dus ja, dit boek is heftig en moedig. Vaak beangstigend en gekmakend frustrerend.

Maar Nelson slaagt erin om niet enkel het verhaal van haar eigen val, haar pijn en wanhoop én de aanloop ernaartoe, te beschrijven; ze houdt ons ook een spiegel voor, deelt de lessen die ze leerde en laat ons al die tijd balanceren op het puntje van onze stoel. Want ja, schrijven kan ze.

Dit boek gaat over letterlijk én figuurlijk vallen en weer opstaan. Opkrabbelen, wankelen, ploeteren en beseffen dat het leven niet alleen geleefd kan worden. Dat je anderen nodig hebt, hulp mag vragen en kwetsbaar mag zijn. Het is ook een ode aan de schoonheid (en meedogenloosheid) van de natuur.

Claire Nelson is een held; als overlever, vechter, volhouder en nu ook als schrijver. Een boek boordevol wijsheid en weidsheid. Ferm onder de indruk!
Profile Image for Kate Kinne.
113 reviews2 followers
November 11, 2021
I enjoyed reading about Claire’s time in the desert and her new perspective on life. At first I wasn’t sure how some of the stories of her life prior to the accident were relevant, but they all tied together in the end.
Profile Image for Lukas Fassbender.
11 reviews
April 8, 2024
„If tears were emotions escaping, then that explaibs why I found it so hard to cry. I‘d had my feelings on maximum security lockdown for a long time.�

An unbelievable story with a critical eye on our current social media generation. Brilliant and authentic ending which deeply touched me. I did not like the switches to the past that much.
Profile Image for Julie Sheila.
121 reviews1 follower
August 16, 2022
Survival story? Im so in. The fact that she was already a writer is a bonus. And I love the other themes she gets into about her solo life. Really great read!
Profile Image for Joni Gabriels.
48 reviews
May 20, 2023
Mooi boek! 'Dankbaarheid' en het 'aanvaarden van hulp', zijn een goede samenvatting, rekening houdend met de titel. :)
Profile Image for Clara Adams.
3 reviews
February 28, 2024
This book changed the way I hike! More than just a survival story, this thoughtfully-written memoir drives home the importance of intentional living and the gift of community.
Profile Image for Diane Law.
556 reviews5 followers
March 10, 2022
An inspirational, gripping and soul-baring memoir of courage, determination and self-discovery.
Nelson goes beyond what happened in those four days when she was stranded in the desert and reflects on her past life and what led her there.
The audio version is narrated by the Nelson herself. I love to hear a tale told in the author's own voice.

"The life we live is an unmarked trail - one of ascents and descents, of changing perspectives and views. Around every corner are adventures to be had, need relationships to be started and sights to be seen."
Profile Image for Mireille.
424 reviews
April 30, 2023
Aardig verhaal met uiteraard het spannende gedeelte van de hoofdpersoon die vier dagen en nachten in Joshua Tree heeft weten te overleven met een gebroken bekken en dus niet in staat zich te verplaatsen. Best onroerend bij tijden. Een wonder dat ze uiteindelijk is gevondem want achteraf, zo vertelt het verhaal, lag ze op een bijna onvindbare plek.
Profile Image for Rosie Thomson.
6 reviews2 followers
July 3, 2021
Wow. An utterly powerful, compelling true story that warmed my heart and made me cry tears of joy and relief.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 529 reviews

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