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Golf Stories #1
The Clicking of Cuthbert
The Oldest Member knows everything that has ever happened on the golf course - and a great deal more besides.
Take the story of Cuthbert, for instance. He's helplessly in love with Adeline, but what use are his holes in one when she's in thrall to Culture and prefers rising young writers to winners of the French Open? But enter a Great Russian Novelist with a strange passion, and Cuthbert's prospects are transformed. Then look at what happens to young Mitchell Holmes, who misses short putts because of the uproar of the butterflies in the adjoining meadows. His career seems on the skids - but can golf redeem it?
In this collection, the kindly but shrewd gaze of the Oldest Member picks out some of the funniest stories Wodehouse ever wrote.
Take the story of Cuthbert, for instance. He's helplessly in love with Adeline, but what use are his holes in one when she's in thrall to Culture and prefers rising young writers to winners of the French Open? But enter a Great Russian Novelist with a strange passion, and Cuthbert's prospects are transformed. Then look at what happens to young Mitchell Holmes, who misses short putts because of the uproar of the butterflies in the adjoining meadows. His career seems on the skids - but can golf redeem it?
In this collection, the kindly but shrewd gaze of the Oldest Member picks out some of the funniest stories Wodehouse ever wrote.
224 pages, Paperback
First published February 3, 1922
146 people are currently reading
881 people want to read
About the author
P.G. Wodehouse
1,563Ìýbooks6,786ÌýfollowersSir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse, KBE, was a comic writer who enjoyed enormous popular success during a career of more than seventy years and continues to be widely read over 40 years after his death. Despite the political and social upheavals that occurred during his life, much of which was spent in France and the United States, Wodehouse's main canvas remained that of prewar English upper-class society, reflecting his birth, education, and youthful writing career.
An acknowledged master of English prose, Wodehouse has been admired both by contemporaries such as Hilaire Belloc, Evelyn Waugh and Rudyard Kipling and by more recent writers such as Douglas Adams, Salman Rushdie and Terry Pratchett. Sean O'Casey famously called him "English literature's performing flea", a description that Wodehouse used as the title of a collection of his letters to a friend, Bill Townend.
Best known today for the Jeeves and Blandings Castle novels and short stories, Wodehouse was also a talented playwright and lyricist who was part author and writer of fifteen plays and of 250 lyrics for some thirty musical comedies. He worked with Cole Porter on the musical Anything Goes (1934) and frequently collaborated with Jerome Kern and Guy Bolton. He wrote the lyrics for the hit song Bill in Kern's Show Boat (1927), wrote the lyrics for the Gershwin/Romberg musical Rosalie (1928), and collaborated with Rudolf Friml on a musical version of The Three Musketeers (1928).
An acknowledged master of English prose, Wodehouse has been admired both by contemporaries such as Hilaire Belloc, Evelyn Waugh and Rudyard Kipling and by more recent writers such as Douglas Adams, Salman Rushdie and Terry Pratchett. Sean O'Casey famously called him "English literature's performing flea", a description that Wodehouse used as the title of a collection of his letters to a friend, Bill Townend.
Best known today for the Jeeves and Blandings Castle novels and short stories, Wodehouse was also a talented playwright and lyricist who was part author and writer of fifteen plays and of 250 lyrics for some thirty musical comedies. He worked with Cole Porter on the musical Anything Goes (1934) and frequently collaborated with Jerome Kern and Guy Bolton. He wrote the lyrics for the hit song Bill in Kern's Show Boat (1927), wrote the lyrics for the Gershwin/Romberg musical Rosalie (1928), and collaborated with Rudolf Friml on a musical version of The Three Musketeers (1928).
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 274 reviews
May 31, 2024
This is very funny!
October 5, 2015
“In the days of King Arthur nobody thought the worse of a young knight if he suspended all his social and business engagements in favour of a search for the Holy Grail. In the Middle Ages a man could devote his whole life to the Crusades, and the public fawned upon him. Why, then, blame the man of today for a zealous attention to the modern equivalent, the Quest of Scratch! *�
P.G. Wodehouse, who was an avid Golfer himself, thus describes the devotion for the sport felt by one of the characters from a story, which appear in this anthology of ten short stories, all written with a golfing theme. �The Clicking of Cuthbert�, published in 1922, is the first book in the �golf series�, which presents the reader with humorous tales pivoting around golfers and golfing adventures.
Each of these golf stories are narrated by a central character named �Oldest Member� � just like Mr. Mulliner from the Mulliner stories series � who over drinks, either at the smoking room or terrace of an unnamed golf club house, shares the anecdotes about golfers to the fellow club members as inspiration. In these stories the reader will come across some of the most amusing comical situations penned by Wodehouse.
In the title story �The Clicking of Cuthbert�, we meet �Cuthbert Banks�, an amateur golfer and a resident of Wood Hills, a picturesque settlement that was going through a bitter rivalry between the local literary society and the local Golf club. When the literary society was having one of it’s sessions at Mrs. Smethurst's house, which stood near to the golf links, a shot taken by �Cuthbert� foozles and the ball accidentally smashes through the window of the house and narrowly miss hitting the chief guest of the session �Raymond Parsloe Devine�, a rapidly rising young novelist. Cuthbert goes inside Mrs. Smethurst’s house to play his ball from where it lay, and meets �Adeline�, the most beautiful girl he has ever met and instantly falls in love. But Adeline loathes golfers and is in search for an ‘intellectual� person and she is full of adoration for Raymond.
Cuthbert joins the literary society to impress Adeline, and this leads to further hilarious moments. At the time of his joining, the literary society was studying works by �Vladimir Brusiloff� - a Russian novelist who specialized in �gray studies of hopeless misery� and in whose books �nothing happened till page 380� � and Cuthbert who hasn’t read anything other than golf guides soon find himself sitting painfully through these sessions, while watching Adeline and her fascination for Raymond.
These descriptions of Cuthbert sitting in �his usual place in a distant corner where, while able to feast his gaze on Adeline, he had a sporting chance of being overlooked or mistaken for a piece of furniture� is laced with good Wodehousian humor. The reader can also detect some fine samples of Wodehouse’s ability to evoke laughter through punchy dialogs within this short story. From a setting when all odds are against Cuthbert, Wodehouse shows his mastery in weaving intertwined comical events and reversals of fortunes, which drives the story of Cuthbert and Adeline ahead and the reader is left with the sensation of pure delight. Even though this formula of evoking humor from a mishmash of comical situations and confusion arising out of misunderstanding is a common attribute of Wodehouse tales, his talent in making each of the stories loaded with fresh humor is applaudable.
The stories �A Mixed Threesome� and �Sundered Hearts� presents the reader with the adventures of �Mortimer Sturgis�, the man who took up Golf at 38 and who then left the girl he was engaged to because he hadn’t the time to combine Golf with his courtship, a series of confusions and pandemonium finally leading to his marriage. The anthology has seven more stories, with each offering its own share of eccentric characters, funny situations and dialog based comedy, which offered a highly enjoyable reading experience. In these stories the reader can easily detect the flair associated with Wodehousian tales as they are from an era when Wodehouse was already a skilled writer.
These lightweight stories are perfectly recommended for relaxed, fun reading. Even though these stories have a lot of golfing jargon, you don’t have to be a Golf fan to fully enjoy these stories.
*
P.G. Wodehouse, who was an avid Golfer himself, thus describes the devotion for the sport felt by one of the characters from a story, which appear in this anthology of ten short stories, all written with a golfing theme. �The Clicking of Cuthbert�, published in 1922, is the first book in the �golf series�, which presents the reader with humorous tales pivoting around golfers and golfing adventures.
Each of these golf stories are narrated by a central character named �Oldest Member� � just like Mr. Mulliner from the Mulliner stories series � who over drinks, either at the smoking room or terrace of an unnamed golf club house, shares the anecdotes about golfers to the fellow club members as inspiration. In these stories the reader will come across some of the most amusing comical situations penned by Wodehouse.
In the title story �The Clicking of Cuthbert�, we meet �Cuthbert Banks�, an amateur golfer and a resident of Wood Hills, a picturesque settlement that was going through a bitter rivalry between the local literary society and the local Golf club. When the literary society was having one of it’s sessions at Mrs. Smethurst's house, which stood near to the golf links, a shot taken by �Cuthbert� foozles and the ball accidentally smashes through the window of the house and narrowly miss hitting the chief guest of the session �Raymond Parsloe Devine�, a rapidly rising young novelist. Cuthbert goes inside Mrs. Smethurst’s house to play his ball from where it lay, and meets �Adeline�, the most beautiful girl he has ever met and instantly falls in love. But Adeline loathes golfers and is in search for an ‘intellectual� person and she is full of adoration for Raymond.
Cuthbert joins the literary society to impress Adeline, and this leads to further hilarious moments. At the time of his joining, the literary society was studying works by �Vladimir Brusiloff� - a Russian novelist who specialized in �gray studies of hopeless misery� and in whose books �nothing happened till page 380� � and Cuthbert who hasn’t read anything other than golf guides soon find himself sitting painfully through these sessions, while watching Adeline and her fascination for Raymond.
These descriptions of Cuthbert sitting in �his usual place in a distant corner where, while able to feast his gaze on Adeline, he had a sporting chance of being overlooked or mistaken for a piece of furniture� is laced with good Wodehousian humor. The reader can also detect some fine samples of Wodehouse’s ability to evoke laughter through punchy dialogs within this short story. From a setting when all odds are against Cuthbert, Wodehouse shows his mastery in weaving intertwined comical events and reversals of fortunes, which drives the story of Cuthbert and Adeline ahead and the reader is left with the sensation of pure delight. Even though this formula of evoking humor from a mishmash of comical situations and confusion arising out of misunderstanding is a common attribute of Wodehouse tales, his talent in making each of the stories loaded with fresh humor is applaudable.
The stories �A Mixed Threesome� and �Sundered Hearts� presents the reader with the adventures of �Mortimer Sturgis�, the man who took up Golf at 38 and who then left the girl he was engaged to because he hadn’t the time to combine Golf with his courtship, a series of confusions and pandemonium finally leading to his marriage. The anthology has seven more stories, with each offering its own share of eccentric characters, funny situations and dialog based comedy, which offered a highly enjoyable reading experience. In these stories the reader can easily detect the flair associated with Wodehousian tales as they are from an era when Wodehouse was already a skilled writer.
These lightweight stories are perfectly recommended for relaxed, fun reading. Even though these stories have a lot of golfing jargon, you don’t have to be a Golf fan to fully enjoy these stories.
*
September 9, 2021
I’m not a golfer by any means, but this is definitely my favourite Wodehouse book. It’s hilarious from start to finish.
June 27, 2018
These pretend to be golf stories, but they aren't. They're the same old delightful Wodehouse: the right sort of young man is pining for a girl, difficulties ensue, he gets the girl anyway. And there's a lot of golf club paraphernalia lying about, and golf games of great importance in settling the matter. Most of it, to be honest, is told in rather out of date slang on golf, which makes the whole experience less realistic and more magical, like fairy tales.
Fun stuff
Fun stuff
October 20, 2007
Fore! Some years ago a friend of mine encouraged me to take up Golf so I could join him in a strange world of tournaments, competitions and social events that would otherwise be closed to me. He offered to take me out on a round to get me into the ‘swing� of things. Some five hours, one hundred and sixty strokes (a very liberal scoring procedure was employed) and five lost balls later both he and I were suffering some frustration. I went to a driving range but had to be smuggled out of the back door should the gentleman in the next booth regain consciousness whilst I was still on the premises. I booked an hour with a ‘Pro� who refunded my money after thirty five minutes. Not to be put off I had a second round with my friend who, on the sixth green, told me that if I didn’t give up golf he would.
So I approached Wodehouse’s collection of Golf stories ‘The Clicking of Cuthbert� with some trepidation. However I was mistaken to be suspicious, these stories mixing the trials and tribulations of golf with the golfer’s attempts to succeed in love or other worthwhile pursuits really are a triumph.
The Oldest Member of the club sums up all aspects of golf in the most wonderful language , such as the following description of weekend golfers ‘Like all Saturday foursomes, it is in difficulties. One of the patients is zigzagging about the fairway like a liner pursued by submarines. Two others seem to be digging for buried treasure or killing snakes. The remaining cripple, who has just foozled a mashie-shot, is blaming his caddie.�
And so I have found a way to participate in the world of golf which was closed to a man of my sporting prowess. Whilst my peers go out for eighteen holes I hole up with the Oldest Member on the terrace of the Mavis Bay golf links and laugh at them. Like the Oldest Member I’m not averse to putting myself on the outside of a cup of Tea and a slice of Cake.
So I approached Wodehouse’s collection of Golf stories ‘The Clicking of Cuthbert� with some trepidation. However I was mistaken to be suspicious, these stories mixing the trials and tribulations of golf with the golfer’s attempts to succeed in love or other worthwhile pursuits really are a triumph.
The Oldest Member of the club sums up all aspects of golf in the most wonderful language , such as the following description of weekend golfers ‘Like all Saturday foursomes, it is in difficulties. One of the patients is zigzagging about the fairway like a liner pursued by submarines. Two others seem to be digging for buried treasure or killing snakes. The remaining cripple, who has just foozled a mashie-shot, is blaming his caddie.�
And so I have found a way to participate in the world of golf which was closed to a man of my sporting prowess. Whilst my peers go out for eighteen holes I hole up with the Oldest Member on the terrace of the Mavis Bay golf links and laugh at them. Like the Oldest Member I’m not averse to putting myself on the outside of a cup of Tea and a slice of Cake.
June 21, 2024
Only P. G. Wodehouse could have induced me to listen to an entire book about golf, and laugh through the whole thing. The final story, in particular, about had me on the floor!
April 5, 2016
What I know about golf - nil.
What I thought about the sport in general - Boring.
What the central theme of the stories in this book was - Golf.
And yet here I am rating a book about golf as magnificent, which just goes to show the genius of Wodehouse. All the stories in this book had me in splits. Don't worry if you find golf to be the most boring sport ever invented, because this book will still be funny.
What I thought about the sport in general - Boring.
What the central theme of the stories in this book was - Golf.
And yet here I am rating a book about golf as magnificent, which just goes to show the genius of Wodehouse. All the stories in this book had me in splits. Don't worry if you find golf to be the most boring sport ever invented, because this book will still be funny.
March 21, 2011
Ten stories, all with the common theme of golf and its tortures. Amusing but not particularly laugh out loud funny. Some great turns of phrase and wonderful images but I have noticed one constant. This is the second volume of his short stories that i have read and though i am always aware of which character I am supposed to like, I almost inevitably find them annoying and self-obsessed. In this volume, which is largely tongue-in-cheek, perhaps that is not a real problem but i carry the horrible suspicion that i am going to loathe all his heroes and feel sorry for all his villains.
July 11, 2024
I've read well over 50 books by Wodehouse and I've read some of those books multiple times, so I've become intimately aware of what I like and dislike. If a Wodehouse title includes one or more of the following words, it'll be a winner: Jeeves, Wooster, Blandings, Psmith, Mulliner, and Uncle. The books I want to stay away from are, generally speaking, the very earliest ones and those that discuss golf. Unfortunately, The Clicking of Cuthbert has both of those things going against it. Even so, it's not terrible! This collection of short stories provides an occasional laugh. Wodehouse was beginning to sharpen his farcical wit, and herein its point and slash flash under your nose now and then, just not enough for me to roll my eyes over these pages more than once.
October 19, 2022
El gentil mundo de Wodehouse. Aunque las historias son repetitivas (y me habrÃa sentido identificado de tener un mÃnimo interés por el golf), siempre sacan por lo menos una sonrisa y a veces hasta una carcajada. Las mejores tres son las de en medio de la colección.
Se siente un poco como ver Caddyshack (aunque sin las copiosas cantidades de cocaÃna que se notan en toda persona que participara en aquella pelÃcula)
Se siente un poco como ver Caddyshack (aunque sin las copiosas cantidades de cocaÃna que se notan en toda persona que participara en aquella pelÃcula)
August 7, 2022
ENGLISH: Ten short stories about how golf can help men marry beautiful girls, or alternatively, escape from girls who hate golf.
ESPAÑOL: Diez cuentos cortos sobre cómo el golf ayuda a los hombres a casarse con chicas guapas, o por el contrario, a escapar de las chicas que odian el golf.
ESPAÑOL: Diez cuentos cortos sobre cómo el golf ayuda a los hombres a casarse con chicas guapas, o por el contrario, a escapar de las chicas que odian el golf.
September 7, 2019
A collection of golf stories, mostly narrated by the Oldest Member. Even a non-golfer such as myself can enjoy these short stories!
May 25, 2024
Wodehouse is as funny as ever! Great observer of human nature revolving around the game of golf & various romantic escapades.
August 20, 2013
"Their friendship ripened rapidly, as friendships do in the South of France. In that favoured clime, you find the girl and Nature does the rest."
"I am not a married man myself, so have had no experience of how it feels to have one's wife whizz off silently into the unknown; but I imagine it must be something like taking a full swing with the brassey and missing the ball."
"A young woman of singular beauty and rather statuesque appearance came out of the club-house carrying a baby swaddled in flannel. As she drew near the table she said to the baby:
'Chickety wicketty wicketty wipsey pop!'
In other respects her intelligence appeared to be above ordinary."
"Their house was not far from the links; Eunice was not engaged to be married; and the aunt made a hobby of collecting dry seaweed, which she dried and pasted in an album. One sometimes thinks that aunts live entirely for pleasure."
Didn't want to write a review for this book; thought I'd take some extracts out of it instead.
One word for anything that is PGW: sublime.
"I am not a married man myself, so have had no experience of how it feels to have one's wife whizz off silently into the unknown; but I imagine it must be something like taking a full swing with the brassey and missing the ball."
"A young woman of singular beauty and rather statuesque appearance came out of the club-house carrying a baby swaddled in flannel. As she drew near the table she said to the baby:
'Chickety wicketty wicketty wipsey pop!'
In other respects her intelligence appeared to be above ordinary."
"Their house was not far from the links; Eunice was not engaged to be married; and the aunt made a hobby of collecting dry seaweed, which she dried and pasted in an album. One sometimes thinks that aunts live entirely for pleasure."
Didn't want to write a review for this book; thought I'd take some extracts out of it instead.
One word for anything that is PGW: sublime.
November 21, 2017
The Oldest Member no longer plays golf, but sits on the terrace of the golf club and watches others play. Younger players come to him for advice and he tells them stories of golfers and romance. Funny, but if I was a golfer and understood anything at all about the game I probably would have thought it even funnier.
July 1, 2024
Ten stories about golf with the usual Wodehouse wit.
“I am a girl of ambition,� repeated Adeline, “and I realize that the fulfillment of my ambitions must come through my husband. I am very ordinary myself—�
“What!� cried Cuthbert. “You ordinary? You can’t have been looking in a glass lately. You stand alone. You make the rest look like battered repaints.�
“Well,� said Adeline, softening a trifle, “I believe I am fairly good-looking—�
“Anybody who was content to call you fairly good-looking would describe the Taj Mahal as a pretty nifty tomb.�
“But that’s not the point. What I mean is, if I marry a nonentity I shall be a nonentity myself forever. And I would sooner die than be a nonentity.�
“And, if I follow your reasoning, you think that lets me out?�
“Well, really, Mr. Banks, have you done anything, or are you likely ever to do anything worth while?�
“I won the French Open last year. Golf, you know.�
“Golf! You waste all your time playing golf. I admire a man who is more spiritual, more intellectual. Like Mr. Devine. Already he has achieved much. The critics say that he is more Russian than any other young English writer.�
“And is that good? I should have thought the wheeze would be to be more English than any other young English writer.�
“Nonsense! Who wants an English writer to be English? You’ve got to be Russian or Spanish or something to be a success. The mantle of the great Russians has descended on Mr. Devine.�
“From what I’ve heard of Russians, I should hate to have that happen to me.�
“There is no danger of that,� said Adeline scornfully.
“I am a girl of ambition,� repeated Adeline, “and I realize that the fulfillment of my ambitions must come through my husband. I am very ordinary myself—�
“What!� cried Cuthbert. “You ordinary? You can’t have been looking in a glass lately. You stand alone. You make the rest look like battered repaints.�
“Well,� said Adeline, softening a trifle, “I believe I am fairly good-looking—�
“Anybody who was content to call you fairly good-looking would describe the Taj Mahal as a pretty nifty tomb.�
“But that’s not the point. What I mean is, if I marry a nonentity I shall be a nonentity myself forever. And I would sooner die than be a nonentity.�
“And, if I follow your reasoning, you think that lets me out?�
“Well, really, Mr. Banks, have you done anything, or are you likely ever to do anything worth while?�
“I won the French Open last year. Golf, you know.�
“Golf! You waste all your time playing golf. I admire a man who is more spiritual, more intellectual. Like Mr. Devine. Already he has achieved much. The critics say that he is more Russian than any other young English writer.�
“And is that good? I should have thought the wheeze would be to be more English than any other young English writer.�
“Nonsense! Who wants an English writer to be English? You’ve got to be Russian or Spanish or something to be a success. The mantle of the great Russians has descended on Mr. Devine.�
“From what I’ve heard of Russians, I should hate to have that happen to me.�
“There is no danger of that,� said Adeline scornfully.
April 25, 2015
Also free on Project Gutenberg.
And granted, I did start reading Wodehouse with Wodehouse's first book of short stories -- so maybe the progression makes sense -- but this book was all about golf, and I hate golf, and this was still the best Wodehouse I've read yet.
Freaking hilarious.
And granted, I did start reading Wodehouse with Wodehouse's first book of short stories -- so maybe the progression makes sense -- but this book was all about golf, and I hate golf, and this was still the best Wodehouse I've read yet.
Freaking hilarious.
February 21, 2016
I was sceptical about this one considering I know NOTHING about golf- but I should have remembered, it is PGW after all. He had me laughing in minutes!
August 20, 2022
I am not interested in the game of golf. Never have been. But you don't read Wodehouse for the subject matter; you do it for his glorious, delightful use of language. Especially when you made a rash oath in your youth to read all 90-whatever of his books.
So here we go.
First off, it's the first time I've seen Plum put himself into one of his works. When it happened, I couldn't stop laughing and had to set the book aside for a time.
In the words of (fictional) Russian novelist, Vladimir Brusiloff: "No novelists any good except me. Sovietski � yah! Nastikoff � bah! I spit me of zem all. No novelists anywhere any good except me. P.G. Wodehouse and Tolstoi not bad. Not good, but not bad. No novelists any good except me" (p.26).
And here are the rest of my favorite selections from this story collection.
---
"A man, I felt, who could stay indoors cataloguing vases while his fiancee wandered in the moonlight with explorers deserved all that was coming to him" (p.62).
"'What will happen?'
'Mortimer will hit you with a cleek.'
'Not at all. I am an old man. My white hairs protect me'" (p.64).
"Some people (began the Oldest member) considered that Mortimer Sturgis was too wrapped up in golf, and blamed him for it. I could never see eye to eye with them. In the days of King Arthur nobody thought the worse of a young knight if he suspended all his social and business engagements in favour of a search for the Holy Grail. In the Middle Ages a man could devote his whole life to the Crusades, and the public fawned upon him. Why, then, blame the man of to-day for a zealous attention to the modern equivalent, the Quest of Scratch?" (p.77).
"In fact, at the age of forty-two, Mortimer Sturgis was in just the frame of mind to take some nice girl aside and ask her to become a step-mother to his eleven drivers, his baffy, his twenty-eight putters, and the rest of the ninety-four clubs which he had accumulated in the course of his golfing career" (p.78).
"'Oh, I can't stand it! I can't stand it!'
'You mean...?' I said, though I knew only too well.
'This horrible obsession of poor George's,' she cried passionately. 'I don't think he has stopped talking once since we have been engaged.'
'He is chatty,' I agreed. 'Has he told you the story about the Irishman?'
'Half a dozen times. And the one about the Swede oftener than that. But I would not mind an occasional anecdote. Women have to learn to bear anecdotes from the men they love. It is the curse of Eve. It is his incessant easy flow of chatter on all topics that is undermining even my devotion'" (p.107).
"The ideal golfer never loses his temper. When I played, I never lost my temper. Sometimes, it is true, I may, after missing a shot, have broken my club across my knees; but I did it in a calm and judicial spirit, because the club was obviously no good and I was going to get another one anyway. To lose one's temper at golf is foolish. It gets you nothing, not even relief" (p.118).
"...the aunt made a hobby of collecting dry seaweed, which she pressed and pasted in an album. One sometimes thinks that aunts live entirely for pleasure" (p.186).
"Why, the very instant that Eunice appeared in the place, every eligible bachelor for miles around her tossed his head with a loud, snorting sound, and galloped madly in her direction. Dashing young devils they were, handsome, well-knit fellows with the figures of Greek gods and the faces of movie heroes. Any one of them could have named his own price from the advertisers of collars. They were the sort of young men you see standing grandly beside the full-page picture of the seven-seater Magnifico car in the magazines. And it was against this field that Ramsden Waters, the man with the unshuffled face, dared to pit his feeble personality. One weeps" (pp.186-7).
"He was just about to give it up and go to bed though it was only nine o'clock, when the telephone bell rang.
'Hello!'
'Is that you, Mr Waters? This is Eunice Bray.' The receiver shook in Ramsden's hand. 'I've just remembered. Weren't we talking about something last night? Didn't you ask me to marry you or something? I know it was something.'
Ramsden gulped three times.
'I did,' he replied hollowly.
'We didn't settle anything, did we?'
'Eh?'
'I say, we sort of left it kind of open.'
'Yuk!'
'Well, would it bore you awfully,' said Eunice's soft voice, 'to come round now and go on talking it over?'
Ramsden tottered.
'We shall be quite alone,' said Eunice. 'Little Wilberforce has gone to bed with a headache.'
Ramsden paused a moment to disentangle his tongue from the back of his neck.
'I'll be right over!' he said huskily" (pp.201-2).
So here we go.
First off, it's the first time I've seen Plum put himself into one of his works. When it happened, I couldn't stop laughing and had to set the book aside for a time.
In the words of (fictional) Russian novelist, Vladimir Brusiloff: "No novelists any good except me. Sovietski � yah! Nastikoff � bah! I spit me of zem all. No novelists anywhere any good except me. P.G. Wodehouse and Tolstoi not bad. Not good, but not bad. No novelists any good except me" (p.26).
And here are the rest of my favorite selections from this story collection.
---
"A man, I felt, who could stay indoors cataloguing vases while his fiancee wandered in the moonlight with explorers deserved all that was coming to him" (p.62).
"'What will happen?'
'Mortimer will hit you with a cleek.'
'Not at all. I am an old man. My white hairs protect me'" (p.64).
"Some people (began the Oldest member) considered that Mortimer Sturgis was too wrapped up in golf, and blamed him for it. I could never see eye to eye with them. In the days of King Arthur nobody thought the worse of a young knight if he suspended all his social and business engagements in favour of a search for the Holy Grail. In the Middle Ages a man could devote his whole life to the Crusades, and the public fawned upon him. Why, then, blame the man of to-day for a zealous attention to the modern equivalent, the Quest of Scratch?" (p.77).
"In fact, at the age of forty-two, Mortimer Sturgis was in just the frame of mind to take some nice girl aside and ask her to become a step-mother to his eleven drivers, his baffy, his twenty-eight putters, and the rest of the ninety-four clubs which he had accumulated in the course of his golfing career" (p.78).
"'Oh, I can't stand it! I can't stand it!'
'You mean...?' I said, though I knew only too well.
'This horrible obsession of poor George's,' she cried passionately. 'I don't think he has stopped talking once since we have been engaged.'
'He is chatty,' I agreed. 'Has he told you the story about the Irishman?'
'Half a dozen times. And the one about the Swede oftener than that. But I would not mind an occasional anecdote. Women have to learn to bear anecdotes from the men they love. It is the curse of Eve. It is his incessant easy flow of chatter on all topics that is undermining even my devotion'" (p.107).
"The ideal golfer never loses his temper. When I played, I never lost my temper. Sometimes, it is true, I may, after missing a shot, have broken my club across my knees; but I did it in a calm and judicial spirit, because the club was obviously no good and I was going to get another one anyway. To lose one's temper at golf is foolish. It gets you nothing, not even relief" (p.118).
"...the aunt made a hobby of collecting dry seaweed, which she pressed and pasted in an album. One sometimes thinks that aunts live entirely for pleasure" (p.186).
"Why, the very instant that Eunice appeared in the place, every eligible bachelor for miles around her tossed his head with a loud, snorting sound, and galloped madly in her direction. Dashing young devils they were, handsome, well-knit fellows with the figures of Greek gods and the faces of movie heroes. Any one of them could have named his own price from the advertisers of collars. They were the sort of young men you see standing grandly beside the full-page picture of the seven-seater Magnifico car in the magazines. And it was against this field that Ramsden Waters, the man with the unshuffled face, dared to pit his feeble personality. One weeps" (pp.186-7).
"He was just about to give it up and go to bed though it was only nine o'clock, when the telephone bell rang.
'Hello!'
'Is that you, Mr Waters? This is Eunice Bray.' The receiver shook in Ramsden's hand. 'I've just remembered. Weren't we talking about something last night? Didn't you ask me to marry you or something? I know it was something.'
Ramsden gulped three times.
'I did,' he replied hollowly.
'We didn't settle anything, did we?'
'Eh?'
'I say, we sort of left it kind of open.'
'Yuk!'
'Well, would it bore you awfully,' said Eunice's soft voice, 'to come round now and go on talking it over?'
Ramsden tottered.
'We shall be quite alone,' said Eunice. 'Little Wilberforce has gone to bed with a headache.'
Ramsden paused a moment to disentangle his tongue from the back of his neck.
'I'll be right over!' he said huskily" (pp.201-2).
July 31, 2023
This is a collection of 10 golf stories told by the Oldest Member except for the last story. The first nine are standard Wodehouse golf stories told by the Oldest Member who sits by the clubhouse finding out the concerns of members walking off the course and then telling them a helpful anecdotal golf story he believes will help the member out.
Generally, the listening member is an involuntary listener, forcibly detained by the Oldest Member’s status when he proceeds in his storytelling despite the listener trying to leave. The stories themselves deal with a member/golfer improving their golf games, winning or losing matches, becoming more or less obsessive over the game, and any such actions that strive to or result in improving, avoiding or somehow affecting romantic and occasionally career interests. The stories do get repetitive with these common themes. But as an avid golfer, the fun of the golf lingo, golf history and Wodehouse’s incredibly witty comments and perspective more than compensates for any repetition. However, I do find that one golf story a day is the best way to read them.
The tenth story is different from the others and almost any other Wodehouse story. Instead of Britain, America or Europe, “The Coming of Gowlf� is set in a nameless Mid-East Asian country at an unknown time. It is a historical parody about how a captured Scot, serving as a gardener to the King, brings the game of “Gowlf� to the people of the country by having the King become a devotee. The story’s ‘gimmick� is that the people interpret the game as a ceremony to worship the god Gowlf. The established High Priest and others see Gowlf as a threat to the existing religion. Zoroaster is mentioned, but having Zoroastrianism as the religion at the same time as golf brings the time frame into question. My belief is that, since Wodehouse was writing a one-off fantastical satire, details on the time frame and location did not matter to him. He was having fun writing about golf being treated as an actual legitimate religion when his usual story only treats it as a virtual religion. So, ignore any ambiguous details and just have fun. Ultimately, though, the story was only moderately entertaining. However, it is an especially timely story now with the Saudi’s basically taking over the PGA Tour.
I rate it as 4 stars.
Generally, the listening member is an involuntary listener, forcibly detained by the Oldest Member’s status when he proceeds in his storytelling despite the listener trying to leave. The stories themselves deal with a member/golfer improving their golf games, winning or losing matches, becoming more or less obsessive over the game, and any such actions that strive to or result in improving, avoiding or somehow affecting romantic and occasionally career interests. The stories do get repetitive with these common themes. But as an avid golfer, the fun of the golf lingo, golf history and Wodehouse’s incredibly witty comments and perspective more than compensates for any repetition. However, I do find that one golf story a day is the best way to read them.
The tenth story is different from the others and almost any other Wodehouse story. Instead of Britain, America or Europe, “The Coming of Gowlf� is set in a nameless Mid-East Asian country at an unknown time. It is a historical parody about how a captured Scot, serving as a gardener to the King, brings the game of “Gowlf� to the people of the country by having the King become a devotee. The story’s ‘gimmick� is that the people interpret the game as a ceremony to worship the god Gowlf. The established High Priest and others see Gowlf as a threat to the existing religion. Zoroaster is mentioned, but having Zoroastrianism as the religion at the same time as golf brings the time frame into question. My belief is that, since Wodehouse was writing a one-off fantastical satire, details on the time frame and location did not matter to him. He was having fun writing about golf being treated as an actual legitimate religion when his usual story only treats it as a virtual religion. So, ignore any ambiguous details and just have fun. Ultimately, though, the story was only moderately entertaining. However, it is an especially timely story now with the Saudi’s basically taking over the PGA Tour.
I rate it as 4 stars.
February 10, 2023
Wodehouse's first book of golf stories, and all the stories have a familiar theme: love transcends all, except golf. A person of either sex becomes fanatical about golf from the moment of picking up a club and hitting (oops... driving) their first ball. The stories are a little samey, but fun.
My father was a very keen golfer until his arthritis became so bad as to make it physically impossible, and my brothers played too, so I understand the difference between a wood and an iron, and I could point out the fairway, the rough, bunkers, and the green on a picture of a golf course. That kind of basic knowledge definitely helps with appreciating this book.
There's one story where a wife objects to her husband practising his putting in the living room, and I'm completely on the side of the golfer, having grown up with the idea that that's normal behaviour. Isn't that part of what a living room's for? For a golfer to practise their putting on wet days...
I was not a big fan of the narrator's voice, which makes a difference with an audio book. Could have been 4 stars with a different narrator.
My father was a very keen golfer until his arthritis became so bad as to make it physically impossible, and my brothers played too, so I understand the difference between a wood and an iron, and I could point out the fairway, the rough, bunkers, and the green on a picture of a golf course. That kind of basic knowledge definitely helps with appreciating this book.
There's one story where a wife objects to her husband practising his putting in the living room, and I'm completely on the side of the golfer, having grown up with the idea that that's normal behaviour. Isn't that part of what a living room's for? For a golfer to practise their putting on wet days...
I was not a big fan of the narrator's voice, which makes a difference with an audio book. Could have been 4 stars with a different narrator.
June 24, 2021
I've listened to this book with the family multiple times over the years. It never gets old and provides abundant entertainment for all ages!
You do not have to be a golfer or know anything about golf to appreciate the humor.
Wodehouse helps us laugh at ourselves, our foibles, and our penchant for taking things far too seriously. I will never stop reading him. I highly recommend an audio version of this. Actor Jonathan Cecil's reading is stupendous!
Our family's favorite short story is the first with the same name as the anthology. Cuthbert, an avid golfer, attempts to woo a lady and finds himself at a literary society in which he feels like a cat cornered in the backyard by schoolboys. This may or may not have relevance to my own situation. My husband may or may not be an avid golfer and I may or may not love book group discussions of all sorts.
You do not have to be a golfer or know anything about golf to appreciate the humor.
Wodehouse helps us laugh at ourselves, our foibles, and our penchant for taking things far too seriously. I will never stop reading him. I highly recommend an audio version of this. Actor Jonathan Cecil's reading is stupendous!
Our family's favorite short story is the first with the same name as the anthology. Cuthbert, an avid golfer, attempts to woo a lady and finds himself at a literary society in which he feels like a cat cornered in the backyard by schoolboys. This may or may not have relevance to my own situation. My husband may or may not be an avid golfer and I may or may not love book group discussions of all sorts.
September 26, 2020
Miraculously, this set of golf stories suffers not at all from the fact I know very, very little about golf (most of my knowledge of the sport comes from a Nancy Drew book). I was still able to follow along perfectly well, and all the stories were hilarious.
December 14, 2018
You don’t have to a golfer to love this book, but it helps.
May 31, 2023
Perfection. Possibly the funniest book I've ever read.
December 3, 2019
What a relief to step from the dystopian reality of the world into the lark strewn meadows of Wodehousian bliss.
March 4, 2015
My copy of the book The Clicking of Cuthbert has a short commentary from Stephen Fry, which goes like this -- "You don't analyse such sunlit perfection, you just bask in its warmth and glory." I could not have said it any better. Maybe literature scholars dissect the work of P.G. Wodehouse and place it certain categories and genres, but for someone like me, his work is pure genius, beyond comparison and above categorisation. It is not the work of a mortal, but that of a literary God, who is rich with his narration, and clever with his words.
The Clicking of Cuthbert has ten short stories revolving around the game of golf, most of them narrated by a fellow known as the Oldest Member who treats golf as one of the greatest religions known to man. But even though the green pastures of a golf course regularly form the backdrop of these stories, the incidents that occur with the protagonists are to do with a lot more than golf (the Oldest Member would be aghast on reading this line!). The theme of love and courtship is the most common and also gives the biggest laughs. P.G. Wodehouse has a way with words that is uniquely his; the tone of his story-telling has a soothing touch to it, which is mixed well with humour to put the reader in one of his best moods. The same holds true for The Clicking of Cuthbert, which is one of his best works that I have read, though again I repeat, we cannot and probably should not judge Wodehouse. His work has stood the test of time, and it is just a privilege to be able to get to read such books. So if you are hunting for something that will make you lighten up and enjoy life a bit more, The Clicking of Cuthbert is a good recommendation!
The Clicking of Cuthbert has ten short stories revolving around the game of golf, most of them narrated by a fellow known as the Oldest Member who treats golf as one of the greatest religions known to man. But even though the green pastures of a golf course regularly form the backdrop of these stories, the incidents that occur with the protagonists are to do with a lot more than golf (the Oldest Member would be aghast on reading this line!). The theme of love and courtship is the most common and also gives the biggest laughs. P.G. Wodehouse has a way with words that is uniquely his; the tone of his story-telling has a soothing touch to it, which is mixed well with humour to put the reader in one of his best moods. The same holds true for The Clicking of Cuthbert, which is one of his best works that I have read, though again I repeat, we cannot and probably should not judge Wodehouse. His work has stood the test of time, and it is just a privilege to be able to get to read such books. So if you are hunting for something that will make you lighten up and enjoy life a bit more, The Clicking of Cuthbert is a good recommendation!
March 2, 2018
This is the first P.G. Wodehouse book I've read, and I have to believe I'm missing something. Yes, it's funny and well-written. In fact there were several moments that delighted me. But I'd always heard Wodehouse spoken of in superlatives, and from this collection I'm just not seeing it. His stories seemed somehow obvious. It's as if Wodehouse had brainstormed a list of possible premises for a comedy sketch about-- in the case of this collection-- golf and romance, and then simply wrote the first story that came to mind around each of them.
By which, as usual, I don't mean to say that it's badly done. Given the general high esteem for Wodehouse I have to assume I'm missing something here. Maybe I'm blinded by hindsight to his inventiveness and interesting writing. Or maybe I just don't appreciate the things that others like about him. I can certainly report that the prose is clever, in that wonderful roundabout English way; and also that the stories are always good for a chuckle and occasionally for more than that. Wodehouse's humor-- which seems to be mostly based on exaggeration and caricature-- sometimes hit for me and sometimes missed. Beyond that I have to admit I didn't notice much worth reporting.
At any rate, I'll have to track down one of Wodehouse's better-known novels (the Jeeves and Wooster ones, I think?) at some point, and see how that reads. Sometimes short stories don't show off writers at their best. For now, I can only say that I found The Clicking of Cuthbert to be reasonably entertaining-- but not much more than that.
By which, as usual, I don't mean to say that it's badly done. Given the general high esteem for Wodehouse I have to assume I'm missing something here. Maybe I'm blinded by hindsight to his inventiveness and interesting writing. Or maybe I just don't appreciate the things that others like about him. I can certainly report that the prose is clever, in that wonderful roundabout English way; and also that the stories are always good for a chuckle and occasionally for more than that. Wodehouse's humor-- which seems to be mostly based on exaggeration and caricature-- sometimes hit for me and sometimes missed. Beyond that I have to admit I didn't notice much worth reporting.
At any rate, I'll have to track down one of Wodehouse's better-known novels (the Jeeves and Wooster ones, I think?) at some point, and see how that reads. Sometimes short stories don't show off writers at their best. For now, I can only say that I found The Clicking of Cuthbert to be reasonably entertaining-- but not much more than that.
October 10, 2009
Started reading this book on net on a dull monday morning in Office.(Ya I do that. :p)
And trust me nothing could have been more refreshing.
I was suggested about Wodehouse books by my friend before.I had even began with one but left in between because
of the arduous verbiage and unfamiliar slangs.
So was bit hesitant before starting this.But it "clicked".:)
The book is collection of short stories themed around the game of golf and the extent to which it worshippers go to
preserve their love for it.The plots built around it are really funny.
The author's passion for the game is quite evident from the details with which the golf has been described.
The type of humor is romantic comedy.But it has delightful sarcasm,wit,quips intertwined within it.
The author ability to incite humor from supposedly ordinary scenarios is truly amazing.
And dont worry if you are not the greatest fan of golf(Like me).Because all the golf jargon somehow doesnt spoil this beautiful comedy.It wont bore a bit once you get hang of it and you'll never know when you have finished it.
The best book of this genre I've read so far.
If you appreciate pleasant witty humor or want to have a quick laugh this book is definitely for you.
Looking forward to more from him.:)
And trust me nothing could have been more refreshing.
I was suggested about Wodehouse books by my friend before.I had even began with one but left in between because
of the arduous verbiage and unfamiliar slangs.
So was bit hesitant before starting this.But it "clicked".:)
The book is collection of short stories themed around the game of golf and the extent to which it worshippers go to
preserve their love for it.The plots built around it are really funny.
The author's passion for the game is quite evident from the details with which the golf has been described.
The type of humor is romantic comedy.But it has delightful sarcasm,wit,quips intertwined within it.
The author ability to incite humor from supposedly ordinary scenarios is truly amazing.
And dont worry if you are not the greatest fan of golf(Like me).Because all the golf jargon somehow doesnt spoil this beautiful comedy.It wont bore a bit once you get hang of it and you'll never know when you have finished it.
The best book of this genre I've read so far.
If you appreciate pleasant witty humor or want to have a quick laugh this book is definitely for you.
Looking forward to more from him.:)
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