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388 pages, Kindle Edition
First published June 13, 2024
It’s set in the same apartment in Paris in 1972 and 2019, about the two different couples who live in the apartment at this 50-year distance from one another, and there are all kinds of interrelations between them. They’re both dealing with the idea of pregnancy, with wanting to have a baby, with difficulty getting pregnant, with fidelity, and trying to reckon with how to live with someone else in a long-term way and how to respect their alterity without trying to erase it or possess them. One is a psychoanalyst, and the other is training to be a psychoanalyst, the two main characters. So there’s a lot about Lacanian psychoanalysis and desire and lack and the compulsion to repeat.
I don’t really know anything about the Raincoats, except that they recorded some music that has affected me so much that whenever I hear it, I’m reminded of a particular time in my life when I was (shall we say) extremely unhappy, lonely, and bored. If it weren’t for the luxury of putting on that scratchy copy of the Raincoats� first record, I would have had very few moments of peace. I suppose I could have researched a bit of history about the band, but I feel it’s more important to delineate the way I feel and how they sound. When I listen to the Raincoats, I feel as if I’m a stowaway in an attic, violating and in the dark. Rather than listening to them I feel like I’m listening in on them. We’re together in the same old house, and I have to be completely still or they will hear me spying from above and, if I get caught � everything will be ruined because it’s their thing.