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Hello everyone! Welcome to the Lurker’s Lounge. This is the spot for anyone who might not be busy reading and/or reviewing; but are still so nosy that they have to know what’s going on.

Yep, that would be me. I’m Kathy, an oft-times lurker and mascot of this group.

Come on in. There are plenty of dark corners from which to peer, as well as cubbyholes for stashing fatally flawed WIPs and terrible poetry.

Open all hours, we serve no refreshments other than the friendly support of your fellow Indie authors. Personally, I’d like donuts, but they’re kind of hard to fry in e-form. Hmm, perhaps an air-fryer might do the trick. I’ll have to experiment. If it works, crullers all around!

Anyway, welcome to the lounge. What’s new in your world—be it real life or the lives you create on the page? Tell me. I love stories.

Kathy!!! *hug* :) How's that sailing story coming?

What would a review group be without our favourite lurker... er, I mean... looker, the one and only Kathy Garlock!

I lurk because I'm still writing.

I'm in the unfortunate position of having the second book of a series done... but only being at 86k words into the first book. I've been writing the darn first book since 2016. Funnily, I set a speed record in drafting the second. I went into this past november with 7800 words, and over eight days got it up to 96k.

So I have one of my slowest written books to precede one of my fastest written. If I can get the darn thing finished.

Robert wrote: "I lurk because I'm still writing..."

Robert, can you send Kathy some of that speed writing mojo? She promised me a pirate book ages ago and I still haven't seen it.

Michael wrote: "Robert wrote: "I lurk because I'm still writing..."

Robert, can you send Kathy some of that speed writing mojo? She promised me a pirate book ages ago and I still haven't seen it."

I'll try if you're sure. Though I fear I might send the procrastination and delay.

David! A long and very enthusiastic hug back at you, my dear friend!

Mike, I'm blushing. What a lovely compliment, and completely unprompted, too!

Hello, Robert! So nice to meet you. I must admit to being very intrigued by your second book being completed before the first. It's the George Lucas method of storytelling--tell the fourth through the six stories before doubling back to the first. However, please don't worry about sending Procrastination and Delay my way, we're already well acquainted. In fact, we take tea together every day. I prefer lemon, whereas they insist on molasses. Nasty stuff, that. And it takes forever to pour.

But I digress. So glad to meet you. And welcome to the Lounge!

It ain't often I feel the need to unload, but check this out...

/topic/show/...

Michael wrote: "It ain't often I feel the need to unload, but check this out...

/topic/show/..."

And to think I thought I'd left that sort of thing behind when I left the uncivil service over a decade ago....

Dearie, dear. I almost expected her to threaten you with a ruler. You can take the librarian out of the library, but you can't remove the stick. At least not in polite company.

Since I haven't yet mastered the air-fryer, or even purchased one, I'll have to offer a sincere "WTF?" instead of a cruller.

Now if it were some random user, there might be some grounds to argue whether a book is part of a series, but I'm not sure where they get the idea they can second guess the author on whether two books are in the same universe.

I know right. Although, I'm sure Emily is currently giving herself a pat on the back (with her ruler) and saying the librarian's mantra: With great power comes great responsibility.

I am NOT lurking.
I am merely loitering.
There is a distinct and legal difference.
And can I have a refill on this coffee please?

Well, Mr. St. Elmo, fancy meeting you here. Of all the gin joints in all the--whaddya mean we ran out of gin?

Here, let me warm up that cuppa joe. Can I interest you in an imaginary cruller?

I'm just here for the air-fried donuts :)

Marise, for you I'll break out the sprinkles!

We have donuts?

Wait, no, I'm on a diet. *sighs wistfully*

They are virtual imaginary donuts, so there are only half the calories of regular imaginary donuts.

Now, the gin on the other hand...

I'm not on a diet. I'm just trying to be less of a man.

Having said that, I'm also not prone to making sentimental comments in public - because y'know, it's not considered 'manly' - but I did one in the general discussion thread. I... uh... had a moment.

Promise it won't happen again.

I wish I were a little less of a man, too.

I am weary of winter.
I feel like I'm wearing my skin backwards and inside out and granola crumbs have got inside. All the clocks are set wrong and everything is damp and cold. I took a hot shower and little needles of ice kept stinging me. Coffee makes me sleepy, and sleep makes me sneeze and the cat won't purr, just meow to go in and out and in and out.
I'm going to build a couch pillow fort, with quilts inside, and hibernate. See you all in spring.

Raymond wrote: "I am weary of winter..."

I have read this information and come to the conclusion you've got it pretty sweet. It's hot as hell here. Perhaps hotter. I'm sweltering away while my wife wants me to have an opinion about what car floor mats we should buy. I'll swap with you any day.

Ha! Sick of winter. Sick of summer. Puhleez!

I live in Minnesota, gentlemen. We have snowdrifts up to our armpits and there's going to be another big snowstorm this weekend. It was 11 below on my way to work yesterday. In January the polar vortex sent temperatures down to 'don't go outside or you'll freeze your eyeballs.'

I'm going to build a fort, too. In my livingroom. It will be an igloo and will probably be the warmest place in the house.

I'd rather be cold than hot. At least one can build an igloo. And add more layers. And cats. A half-dozen cats are a big help!
After - in the memorable summer of 2015/16 (southern hemisphere) - three solid weeks hitting 42-43 deg Celsius (that's about 110 deg F), and not dropping below 27 C (80 F) at night, I wanted to peel my skin off. And I have once experienced the delightful 47 C (117F) on the subtropical, humid, Natal North coast.
Then there's the occasional Harrismith brain freeze. Which means -18 C (just under 0 F, or 32 below 0 in Fahrenheit terms) with a maximum, on a nice sunny day with no snow in sight, of -1 C, in other words it never got warm enough to melt anything. In sunny South Africa!

Mind you, we've only had armpit snowdrifts once...

You'd think that, until your eyeballs freeze.

We actually had a weatherperson from NYC broadcast from a park wearing huge goggles, insisting they protected her eyeballs from freezing.

Of course all the locals stood around laughing, icicles trickling down their cheeks.

Sled dog--Seeing eye dog--it's only a matter of training.

Absolutely. See these specially bred Minnesota Seeing Eye Sled Dogs!

Newfies!! Look at those sweet faces. My sister-in-law had several Newfies. They are great dogs but you need to wear a body towel when you're with them.

Not if it's really as cold as you've been claiming... !

It's getting awfully lonely in here. Where did everybody go?

I've been recruiting. Trying to get some of the folks we know to join the gang group. IRL issues are not an acceptable excuse as far as I'm concerned. Imaginary doughnuts for all!

Also been screening out some tire kickers. Perhaps we have the formula right at last.

Loved reading everyone's weather complaints, especially as I have that difficult commute the six feet from the bed to the computer every day. I think we're the only place in the US that had a completely typical winter. That said, we aren't far off spring... and the snow is still falling outside my window. :O

Hi K.S., or may I call you Kathy?
(waves frantically)

I thought my work commute was tough--7 minutes on a good day, but you've got me beat. So glad you made it here to the lounge. Can I offer you one of our signature, imaginary air-fried donuts? One with powdered sugar, perhaps, to celebrate that dusting of snow outside your window?

Kick back and relax. You're in good company in this great little group.

I think I woke up with double vision this morning - or is that an echo?

It's the baby boom echo.
Kathy... Kathy.... Kathy

I've invited every Kathy on Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ to join. We may have to change the group name.

Michael wrote: "I've invited every Kathy on Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ to join. We may have to change the group name."

Nice to have hobbies, lol.

Ding-a-ling-ling!

David wrote: "Ding-a-ling-ling!"
What?
I was asleep!
Dammit, someone take that damned bell from David or I'm a gonna get cranky.

Oh, thank goodness! Someone came!

I need a cup of tea and some nice toast, please!

David wrote: "Oh, thank goodness! Someone came!

I need a cup of tea and some nice toast, please!"

Kitchen's closed. There's a vending machine across the highway. Wait till traffic stops before yah try and cross. Don't use the culvert under the highway, that's where Cousin Billy sleeps.

You're new in these parts, right?

But I'm SICK! So very sick. I'm stuck in bed... and it feels like I'm dying.
I need someone to spoil look after me.

David wrote: "But I'm SICK! So very sick. I'm stuck in bed... and it feels like I'm dying.
I need someone to spoil look after me."

No prob. Wait there.
I'll go fetch Cousin Billy.
He can sleep on the floor, fetch what yah need.
Just, for god's sake don't let him on the bed.

I can't do anything but wait here.

Marmite toast, please.

You're so nice!

David wrote: "
Marmite toast, please."

Cousin Billy says the vending machine in the gas station has Cheetos. That's it. That's it. Darn raccoons get in there and eat up the cup cakes.

You'll like Cheetos. They put a radioactive orange glow to your intestines that drives away the bugs of a foreign digestive system like yours.

I do like Cheetos. It's not marmite toast, but at least you're trying.

*whispers* Are you sure Cousin Billy's a certified caregiver? He doesn't smell very hygienic

David wrote: "Are you sure Cousin Billy's a certified caregiver? He doesn't smell very hygienic"

I do solemnly promise, Cousin Billy has been certified here and thereabouts; and twice in Austin. And what he doesn't know about institutional care and maintenance could fill a thimble and still have room for his head.

I'm going back to bed.
Keep him happy and he'll fetch what you want.

Just keep him off the bed, out of your meds, and for god's sake don't mention the Governor, Exodus 22:18 or any of the Matrix sequels.

'Night.

*Groan*

Billy, NO! Company will NOT make me feel better!
Down! Go lie down... good boy.

Squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak .

Dayshift's here! How's our patient doing? I hope my squeaky shoes didn't bother you. Cousin Billy must have been waxing the floor again. Please don't ask him what he uses. I really don't want to know.

I heard you'd like some marmite toast. I'm so sorry, but we're fresh out. The marmots must have been after them again. Silly things think that it's named for them. How about an imaginary cruller instead? I have one with sprinkles!

Never say no to a cruller. Especially one with sprinkles.

*smiles weakly, looking as pathetic as possible*

That's my boy! We'll have you up and around in no time.