I’ve come to the conclusion that there are two types Find all of my reviews at:
WARNING: THAR BE SPOILAGE
I’ve come to the conclusion that there are two types of grown women in the world. Those who love Disney and all of its princesses and then there’s me . . . .
I don’t understand how the other half thinks and they probably feel the same about me. That being said, I requested this from the library after seeing it being equated to “a female version of Jack Sparrow� which had me immediately going . . . .
If I had known I was getting a Disney princess story I wouldn’t have wasted my time. Especially if I had known it was going to remind me of the most vapid of them all . . . .
Who doesn’t turn out to be a mermaid, but instead is . . . .
Just kidding. She ends up being part siren. Buuuuuuuuut you don’t find that out until you’re a goodly chunk into the story because we’re too busy finding out this crap is going to be a kissing book which had me all like . . . .
And also saying things like . . . .
When bitch can take a bloodied lip, but god forbid the bad guy decides to cut off her fiery red locks (because OF COURSE she has red hair). Not to mention rather than kicking ass like a real pirate, this chick relies on her feminine wiles and opts to seduce multiple male characters which left me all . . . . .
FFS � in case you didn’t get the message � TIME’S SUPPOSED TO BE UP. Why don’t you female authors get on board and stop writing stupid bimbos and instead write some stabby ones. I have been so impressed with the Young Adult genre recently. This one was like taking twelve steps back. Oh, and OF COURSE it’s a series . . . .
It appears I may have kinda read this wrong, but just . . . .
I don’tFind all of my reviews at:
3.5 Stars
It appears I may have kinda read this wrong, but just . . . .
I don’t know if I had a sixth sense that I would be a wrongreader or what, but I have owned this sucker in paper format where it sits prominently along with so many other “yeah I bought it but I probably won’t get around to reading it unless I’m housebound due to illness or a zombie apocalypse� selections on my bookshelves. When this popped up as a recommendation on the WRC in order for me to earn my annual coffee mug from the liburrrrrry . . . .
I put my name on the wait list for an e-copy (easier for me to read on the go/at lunch/etc.). My friend Christine’s review convinced me it really was time to stop procrastinating. So what (sorta) went wrong? Welllllllll, since this is a mystery let me give you a list that will hopefully ‘splain my reaction without offering up any spoilsies.
1. My copy was 600 PAGES long. That was reason numero uno for me not reading this sooner and I was absolutely right in my thinking that there was zero reason for a mystery to contain so many pages. A quarter of this book could have been cut without a problem.
2. Everyone else seems to really appreciate Tana French’s writing, but the flowery style interwined with Rob’s narrative in combination with this being simply a “whodunit� was jarring to me.
3. A superbadawful had happened to the leading male when he was just a kid. Somehow dude ONLY STARTED GOING BY HIS MIDDLE NAME and no one ever put two and two together that he was the kid from way back when. And he’s a cop. Please don’t ever let anything bad happen to me in Ireland if you can really become a murder detective without a better background check than this.
4. Rob and his partner Cassie were the bees knees and an example of how male and female co-workers can be equals and not fall into the sack with each other . . . until they weren’t. I literally screamed “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!� and scared the crap out of both my husband and the cat. And Cassie’s wrap-up at the end????
What a cherry to put on top of that shit sundae. I just noticed that she’s the main character in the next book and there’s no chance I’ll be reading it because I lost all respect for her.
5. Apparently the whodunit came as a big shocker to a lot of readers as well, but again I was like . . . .
Maybe it’s because mystery-thrillers are my genre of choice, but there were tons of not-so-subtle hints dropped throughout the book that pointed a spotlight on the truly guilty party.
In The Woods was a decent book, but I’m rounding down rather than up because it just didn’t stand out enough compared to the billions of other murder mysteries on the market. But again, I read it wrong and if it’s on your TBR it should stay there.
Since the Winter Reading Challenge doesn't end until March, this still counts even though I already scored my mug. Yay me for being an overachiever ; )
EDIT: Because now that I've read some more of my friends' reviews it appears that the one thing consistently complained about (the ending regarding the superbadawful from wayback) was the thing that I really thought stood out from other stories like this. Those issues tend to get waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too convoluted and/or wrapped up too prettily for my liking. I also appreciated NOT having to endure the wibbly-wobbly timey wimey for the entire book and only being presented snippets of Rob/Adam's story....more
The basics of Providence is thatFind all of my reviews at:
So many thoughts. Please bear with me . . . .
The basics of Providence is that it is about a boy who disappeared and returned four years later . . . different than he was before. It becomes his mission over the years to “fix� himself of this change in order to be with the girl he has always loved. In addition to that story is one that runs parallel about a detective trying to figure out what really caused a series of death by heart attack in various young/healthy people and the wife who is trying her best to keep their marriage intact.
First things first, it goes without saying that I read this wrong. A handful of reviewers received copies before Providence even went on NetGalley and they all creamed their collective jeans over it. Maybe some of my fellow wrong-readers will be joining me in short order, but for now I will occupy the corner of shame all by my lonesome.
I’d like to say my “meh� reaction had nothing to do with The Books of Joe, but that would be bullshit. I mean, if I hadn’t fallen head-over-heels in love with Joe and instead had thought he was uggo and 1-Starred his stories I obviously would not have been running people over in order to obtain an advanced copy of this book. I also wouldn’t have had such high (or perhaps unrealistic) expectations for this book.
I’d love to be able to say that I didn’t feel like I was missing anything by not being a Lovecraft superfan, but that would also be total bullshit. Part of Kepnes� charm is that she is willing to go balls out with pop culture references and clearly gives not one rip if these contributions will date her books in the future. My knowledge of all things Lenny Feder . . .
Familiarity with a little more than just the basics regarding Jon’s dilemma . . . .
And an obsession with The Boss so extreme as soon as a mere song title was mentioned his voice started singing oh so relevant lyrics in my head . . .
♪♫♪“Sometimes it’s like someone took a knife baby edgy and dull and cut a six inch valley through the middle of my soul . . .� ♪♫�
Definitely added to my reading experience. But it was because of my brain’s complete worthlessness except when it comes to trivia questions that I felt a glaring hole of stupidity and inability to truly “get it� when it came to references regarding I Am Providence and all the secrets that may be (are probably) contained within the pages of The Dunwich Horror - a book I have never read.
And worst of all was that I was really into this story at the beginning. I was smitten with little Jon, the outsider, and was enthralled with both his disappearance and reappearance. I was completely ready to fall in love with him as a man and form some freaky polygamist cult with him and Joe (and Eggs) as my brother husbands. The writing (which unfortunately I can’t quote because rules are rules when it comes to ARCs) was BRILLIANT � simply painted onto the page. But then??????
It got so boooooooooooooooooooooring. The knife-blade writing style that defines Kepnes� voice became dull and nothing happened and there were still like nearly 300 pages left of the book and Chloe was a cardboard cutout of even more nothingness (and maybe she was supposed to be nothing, but she can’t have a voice and occupy so much narration time and be NOTHING FFS) and Eggs who was basically the amalgamation of every Bruce Willis playing the “old man� character you could ever imagine even lost his charm and I was like . . . .
I don’t have the genetic makeup that allows me to “DNF� a book, so I can’t say that thought ever crossed my mind. I will say that this should never have taken me more than one sitting to read if I had liked it as much as Kepnes� prior two novels and I definitely shouldn’t have found my mind wandering to other selections on my TBR and wondering if I should have read them before this. I have no choice but to be honest. I didn’t love this. I am very appreciative for the opportunity to read an advanced copy, I’m even more appreciative that Kepnes and/or her publisher is so generous and appear to be willing to offer copies to nearly everyone who requests them, I’ll absolutely read the next thing she comes up with, but unfortunately for me Providence missed the mark.
2.5 Stars and I’m rounding up because I can’t in clear conscience round down. I can’t wait to see what my friends think. (As long as they leave their pitchforks and torches at home.)
Advanced copy provided in exchange for an honest review. Thank you, NetGalley!...more
Being one of the boys is a pretty simple task. CFind all of my reviews at:
“I thought you were one of the boys.�
Being one of the boys is a pretty simple task. Choose the right side in “the war.� What war, you might ask? The war between mother and father. Pick dad and you pick strength � fun � a new start in a new location � a chance to be one of the boys with him and your brother. Pick mom and you’re weak � nothing � less than nothing. It’s not until your new life starts that you begin to see what started the war to begin with. Dad’s volatile temperament, his inability to focus on his job at times, and the worst thing of all � the strange chemical smells that come out of his bedroom when he locks himself in there, sometimes for days at a time “smoking cigars.�
I’m pretty sure I read this wrong. Okay that’s a lie. I know I read this wrong. It was supposed to make me feel all the feels and it didn’t. That’s alright, though, because . . . .
And this time I’m blaming everyone in my household being sick as the problem instead of my lack of heart. Here’s an image of what I experienced this weekend. First with the husband . . . .
Then with the oldest boy . . . .
Then the baby of the family . . . .
Before finally succumbing to my own symptoms while at work . . . .
In addition to all that, here’s the deal: I would totally market this as young adult. Although it deals with some super serious mature storylines, I’m all about pushing the envelope. My (upper) middle schooler is currently reading an “award winning� recommendation from the school district. So is his teacher’s FOURTH GRADE son. It probably goes without saying my (not a voluntary reader to begin with) kid is hating every second of this experience. One of the Boys has a lot of things that might keep him interested: it’s short (remember, not a big reader), it’s contemporary and it deals with adult subject matter (drug use and child abuse). The thing that works for me when it comes to books I like discussing with the kid is the “book clubby� nature that generates conversation. Why do the characters not have names? What does he think was really up with the mom? Why does he think the boys chose dad in “the war�? Was dad healthy before they moved away from Kansas? Does he think the kids did anything wrong ever � either back in Kansas or in New Mexico? Why does he think they never tried to get away or tell someone about what was happening? Would HE tell someone what was happening if this was his life? THIS is the type of outcome I want to have after my kid finishes a book. Not to mention his privileged little hiney could stand a dose of “not everyone has it so good� every once in a while. If you’re like me, you might want your kid to read this one too. If you’re not like me I have a bunch of generic, vanilla recommendations from the school I can give you : ) ...more
Let me start by saying I really should have enjoyed this more than I did and I’m kind of Find all of my reviews at:
Let me start by saying I really should have enjoyed this more than I did and I’m kind of bummed that I didn’t. The story here is of Desi Lee � an overachiever to the nth degree. A senior in high school, Desi has made a habit of setting a goal for herself and achieving it. Straight As, varsity soccer stud, on her way to early admittance to Stanford - Desi makes her own destiny. There’s only one thing she fails at � the opposite sex. When a new boy shows up at school, Desi decides she’s going to stop being a flop with boys and decides to get a little inspiration in the form of K-Dramas in order to script her way to romance.
Sounds like something right up my alley, doesn’t it? What can I say????
Have no fear, I’m not going to channel my inner Gretchen Weiners here when it comes to me not loving this as much as I should . . . .
Nope. I have no problem with rom-coms that use a little deception in order to get the ball rolling. Give me a “friends dared me to date you but then we fell in love� or “let’s pretend to date so you can get the guy you like, but really we’ll fall in love� and 9 times out of 10 my middle-aged butt will eat it up and be smiling from ear to ear the entire time. So that being said, obviously I didn’t really care a whole lot about the use of soap opera plotlines to be the inspiration on how to get the guy. Sadly, it was the guy himself. Well, not really. The guy was fine, it was how he ended up being the guy Desi wanted to go for that was the problem.
You see, the story started with Desi having an actual crush on someone. Said someone being a Freshman, it created a lot of fodder for her friends to poke fun at her about. Then Luca walks into school and Desi decides to go for him. Based on what? That he was good looking? Just to say she was able to get a boyfriend? So shallow. I think if she would have gone with her actual feelings and tried to date the Freshman this would have worked a lot more for me. And for anyone who wants to say “ewwww, a four year age difference?!?!?!?!� � that could have been handled just as easily as Desi falling for a complete stranger like was the case here. He could have had a weird birthday that made him older than everyone in class, she could have either had the opposite sort of birthday making her younger or have skipped a grade or something. Also, Desi wasn’t a character who was looking for some serious thing when she started her little experiment so it didn’t need to end up with some “love of her life� situation � they could have went to the prom and had a little smooch and moved on with their lives. Why did the author even have to mention the first boy?!?!?!?!?!
I know I ruined my own good time by overthinking this one, but I couldn’t make my brain shut up. I also still can’t get this freaking song out of my head . . . .
Go read AJ’s review instead. Her brain isn’t her nemesis so she can enjoy things....more
I’m not even going to bother with a review on this one. I’m always aware that I’m not theFind all of my reviews at:
I’m not even going to bother with a review on this one. I’m always aware that I’m not the target demographic while reading young adult stories, but this one really made me feel like a super geezer and very much a mom. And also . . .
Go look at what Matthew had to say instead. He felt all the things this book is supposed to make you feel and his review is perfection. Then come back and join me on the countdown to the release of They Both Die at the End next Tuesday because if there’s one thing I’m certain about � it’s that I’ll continue to read whatever words Adam Silvera puts on paper. He’s real good at them . . . .
“He broke me in a way everyone should be lucky to be cracked open at least once. I had the privilege of being destroyed by him until we found a better, real me inside of the person I was pretending to be. I hope I make him proud.�
He’s also real good at writing characters I want to adopt. It was Aaron in More Happy Than Not, and it was Wade this time around . . . .
Wrong Reader, Party of One??? Yep, that’s me! I put Ginny Moon on hold at the Find all of my reviews at:
Wrong Reader, Party of One??? Yep, that’s me! I put Ginny Moon on hold at the library because every single one of my friends who read it gave it at least 4 Stars. Now that school has started I’m assigned the task of finding stories my book-hating (I know, the hospital obviously gave me the wrong baby, but he’s grown on us over the years) kid might actually want to read without me tying him down and forcing him. One thing I know for certain is it won’t be this one because I pretty much looked like this the entire time I was reading it . . . .
Put your rocks and pitchforks down and give me a second to explain myself.
I’m not even sure if this is a young adult selection or not, but that really doesn’t matter. We’ve discovered the kid succeeds with “contemporary realistic fiction� so as long as I read the book first and make sure it’s not too adult for his developing brain to wrap itself around, it doesn’t really matter if it was marketed for teens or grown-ups. That being said, a lot of parents would be uncomfortable with the content here and obviously that’s totally up to each family to decide for themselves.
I am also not familiar enough with autistic children to determine how accurate Ginny’s voice was. To someone inexperienced such as myself, she seemed very realistic. Again, I’m sure there are others who will bash this character and/or the author and become super “offended� by her portrayal, but since it’s not a trigger for me I can’t participate in that party.
So let’s get to the plot. The story here is of Ginny Moon (you don’t say, huh?). Ginny was taken from her birth mother when she was nine years old due to severe neglect and placed in the foster care program. Fastforward nearly five years to the present and a Ginny who has been adopted by her “Forever Family.� The only problem is that Ginny has more than a bit of a tunnel-vision issue when it comes to a certain Baby Doll that was left behind all those years ago and she is willing to do anything to get back to it.
The above leads to my biggest issue with this book and why I won’t be recommending it to my kid . . . .
Ginny Moon was FIVE HUNDRED PAGES long. I understand the reader kind of has to become part of “the loop� which is Ginny’s thought process, but this thing should have been cut down to half the size. I’m going to try real hard not to spoil things, but let me just say as a grown up, it was 100% clear what was going on with the Baby Doll immediately and it should have been for all of the other adults in Ginny’s life as well which equaled a Kelly and Mitchell who kept getting more and more perturbed.
Leading to the other problem. The “Forever Mother� . . . .
I can’t remember the last time a character infuriated me this much. I mean I was literally screaming at my Kindle at one point. As the story developed, the less believable it was that this woman would have ever went along with adopting a special needs child to begin with. I mean, I know first-hand that pregnancy/new baby/postpartum can make you go a little batshit, but Ginny was a child with serious issues even before the “miracle pregnancy� happened just like the “Forever Mother� was probably a giant bitch way before then too. Ginny came into their lives looking like she “came out of a concentration camp.� She was a child with severe food issues (up to the point where a lock had to be put on the refrigerator to stop her from gorging herself and vomiting every day). She had been removed from another foster home due to an “incident� with the family cat. She had impulse control problems to the point of putting herself in harm’s way repeatedly. There is not one part of me that believes this woman would have adopted this child and when the whole point of the story is how realistic it is supposed to be, it becomes a glaring neon sign. But like I said, everyone else loved it, so you probably will too. 2.5 Stars for me : (...more
Anyone seen Shelby around? Here � lemme crawl in my safe space just in case she Find all of my reviews at:
3.5 Stars
Anyone seen Shelby around? Here � lemme crawl in my safe space just in case she shows up . . . .
So I fully admit I read this wrong, but that’s what happens when people go 4 and 5 Star something and make me want it without knowing anything. Go read Shelby or Zoeytron or Diane S.’s reviews to see that you do want this on your TBR and read this one only to confirm that . . . .
The main problem I had with If The Creek Don’t Rise was the fact that I attempted to read it on what turned out to be the most stressful weekend of my young 20-something year old (just go with it) life. You see, one of my oldest friends passed away this weekend and she did so just like the filthy hooker she was � with a bunch of hollering and smoke pouring from both her front and her butt on a street corner. Said friend was my beloved Volkswagon Passat. This book was read while spending eleventy-three hours waiting to get approved for the opportunity to give all of my money away every month on a new “friend� who probably won’t end up being half as loyal as she was.
Anyway, I didn’t know anything about this book except for the swoony ratings � and really, even if I had bothered looking at the synopsis I wouldn’t have been aware that this wasn’t going to end up being the story of Sadie Blue like I was banking on. While Sadie Blue and her sad and sorry life were the jumping off point, If The Creek Don’t Rise ended up being more like little vignettes by alllllllll of the residents of Baines Creek. The writing was truly captivating, but I’m not a huge fan of books that “play on repeat� with various scenes looping and being told by multiple narrators. If that kind of thing isn’t your cuppa either, you might struggle too. I rarely (if ever) say this, but this is a book that could have benefitted from quite a lot more pages. I felt like every single one of the characters had so much more to give and would have liked to have had the chance to get to know them more. That being said, I’m interested to see what Leah Weiss comes up with next. I hope to shout it’s more from Appalachia, because I think she’s got a lot more to say.
Copy provided by NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. Thank you, NetGalley! ...more
I put this one on hold after seeing my friend °ä³ó°ù¾±²õ³Ù´Ç±è³ó±ð°ù’s very concise review and glancFind all of my reviews at:
I put this one on hold after seeing my friend °ä³ó°ù¾±²õ³Ù´Ç±è³ó±ð°ù’s very concise review and glancing at the synopsis enough to see that Hope is someone who no one remembers. Literally. That was enough for me. And now?????
It appears that Claire North has quite the cult following so please don’t troll me. Although this was my first experience with Ms. North (or Ms. Webb, depending on the book), I think it’s pretty safe to say her writing style either works for you or it doesn’t. Obviously my rating indicates that it didn’t work for me. At nearly 500 pages, I found this to be waaaaaay too verbose in relation to the amount of story being delivered, the dialogue felt stilted and since Hope was forgotten almost instantaneously once out of someone’s sight, most of the scenes were pretty much like . . . . .
With a touch of this thrown in for good measure . . . . .
What the?????
In my defense, while perusing the glowing reviews I found several that talked about how this was a young adult selection and that Hope was in her teens. Uhhhhhh, there is a big ol� segment regarding “a letter, from myself, to myself, written when I was twenty-four years old.� I will gladly admit I read this wrong, but it seems like some others did too....more
Actual footage of me logging on to my account to post this unpopular opinion . . . .
^^^It’s just like lookin� in a mirror!
Seriously, thougActual footage of me logging on to my account to post this unpopular opinion . . . .
^^^It’s just like lookin� in a mirror!
Seriously, though, I was kinda scared everyone would be throwing tomatoes at me, but then I saw my friends� ratings and some of y’all didn’t love this one either. Also, I never feel bad about sharing my honest reaction. And also x2, the other Kristin Hannah book I read I gave 5 Stars and I tell everyone to read. And also x3, I am currently 74mothafuggin2nd on the library waiting list for her newest release so obviously my meh response to this has not deterred me at all from her other books.
So here’s the deal(s).
#1: I liked this better the first time . . . .
#2: Speaking of first time. When I was a youngster there was a big trend in stories about the news. Movies like Absence of Malice and Network and Broadcast News played on repeat on the local movie channels. There’s been another resurgence of stories featuring journalists with Bombshell and The Morning Show. Sadly, I have zero interest in the behind the scenes world of the news anchor/producers/etc. There was A LOT of news talk in this and it was a snore.
#3: This was so far on the “chick lit� spectrum I’m pretty sure I did this . . . .
#5: It was eleventy billion pages of day-to-day mumbo jumbo for the most part, and I am a basic bitch who likes my stories to have a lot of action and still wrap up at right around a 350 page count.
#6: And the worst thing of all? I really did not like either of these two ladies.
Bottom line? I still suck turtles . . . .
Shocker.
I know a bunch of you loved this. Sadly I did not....more
I read this way back in the dark ages before I started “reviewing� on GR. Generally I donFind all of my reviews at:
I read this way back in the dark ages before I started “reviewing� on GR. Generally I don’t go back and add anything to those blank ratings (or the even more fulfilling “this was guud � I lurved it� wordsmithian contributions of my early days). However, since the movie version of this has already debuted in Europe and masses will be perusing the feed as it draws closer to the Christmastime release date here in the U.S. I am now waiting with bated breath for the troll army to arrive at my doorstep. I am literally the only 2 Star review amongst all of my friends/people I follow and to be 100% honest here I would have given it 1 Star if it weren’t for the artwork so I figure should explain my low rating . . . .
Wait, that’s not it . . . .
°Õ±á´¡°Õ’S more like it. I don’t know what to tell you. I read it wrong. I thought it was contrived and failed at manipulating my emotions â€� probably because I don’t have any. I had no clue who I could/should recommend this to or who was even supposed to be the target audience (it was filed with graphic novels at my library so you can see even they failed to decipher this problem). I’ve gone on to read other Patrick Ness books and I am completely enamored with him â€� always fresh, unique, inventive, etc. This one just didn’t work out for me . . . . because as aforementioned, I don’t reed guuuud. The movie trailer, however?????? Wow . . . .
Kelly (and the Book Boar)
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