Unfortunately I did not love this the way I did Victorian Psycho.
The unhinged woman was still there. Even some of the subject matter was still th2.5/5
Unfortunately I did not love this the way I did Victorian Psycho.
The unhinged woman was still there. Even some of the subject matter was still there. But because the tone of this was much more thriller with far less humor, I didn't really have fun with it.
Other marks against it are that the narrator is very unreliable, and she is outside the norm but exceedingly obsessed with maintaining normative appearances. Neither is generally a characteristic I have high success rates with in books, but ymmv....more
This book held my attention much better than many books have lately, but the more I think about it the more I think I dislike it?
Initially this book sThis book held my attention much better than many books have lately, but the more I think about it the more I think I dislike it?
Initially this book seemed like it was trying to critically engage with rebellion through the lens of a fairly centrist, "model minority" citizen. Throughout the book she'd be challenged with the corrupt system and her place in it, grappling with how she can take a more active role and affect change in her community for the better.
...and then it didn't.
I can't tell how much of this is a debut issue, a first book in the series with more growth saved for sequels issue, or genuinely just the author's worldview.
To sum this book up: White Lady politics.
See, it's very clear which side the author is on by which POV she chooses to write from, how she paints the other characters, and who has to apologize and grovel at the end of the book when it turns out they were wrong. (It seemed like she was trying to do a twist reveal but it was super, super telegraphed and made the opposition opinion seem much more villainous throughout the book without allowing for nuance or the reader to build positive feelings).
In the book, the main character has grown up as the child of immigrants from a country that is treated with prejudice. She's done well for herself thanks to her magical talents and a lot of luck, and even brushes elbows with the nobility. And it sucks because obviously the wealthy are going to be very poised and mannered, and the oppressed are going to be more emotional and violent. But the main character NEVER interrogates anything close to that and mostly clutches her pearls at the thought of regicide.
[image]
There's endless time to devoted to the right kind of nobility who simply can't imagine any nobles ever taking their duty lightly or abusing their position. And the main character is so smitten with him and his politics. He's given moments of growth where he can learn from her and become even more informed and better himself, while still always defending divine right.
Meanwhile the rebels are portrayed constantly as rabble rousers who are throwing rocks at beehives, completely unaware of the trouble they're stirring, and with very little on-page screentime to likewise interact with and grow alongside the main character.
Like the author knows the system is unfair, but somehow thinks the way to change things is to never bristle at injustice, be born super hot, have magic powers, be really single, and then a Prince falls in love with you and that's how you re-shape the world? ehhhhhhhh no.
Aside from the destination of this book being such a letdown.... nothing happens. The characters are neither rich nor interesting, the setting is mundane (her charms are both integral to the plot but also feel tacked on?), and it's mostly a lot of folks just talking at each other.
(She also always blames herself when bad actors do a murder instead of blaming the murderers who are trying to extort her???? Just a really childish way of interacting with the world and believing whatever propaganda and spin another character tells her.)
I'm now convinced that it was just the Moira Quirk effect making this book investing. And the actual book itself without a narrator? No, thank you.
The good news is this appears to be a debut. The bad news is the author didn't really inspire confidence that, as her writing improves, I'm gonna be interested in reading her worldview some more....more
also: THERE'S NO MYSTERY. AT ALL. ZERO. ZILCH. this is a contemporary, smalreally boring, really nothing
I don't get why this series gets any attention
also: THERE'S NO MYSTERY. AT ALL. ZERO. ZILCH. this is a contemporary, small town cozy romance and that's literally it. stop labeling it a mystery...more
edit: the magic system Richard Swan created with Yelena continues to haunt me... (I believe in my heart of hearts that this was somewhat of a throwawayedit: the magic system Richard Swan created with Yelena continues to haunt me... (I believe in my heart of hearts that this was somewhat of a throwaway idea for him, and honestly not meant to be fixated or ruminated on. but it's just So Weird that it ended up stuck in my head. And if I am wrong in this belief then DEAR GOD I do not want to know.)
- can the witch-healer only use her powers to cure folks with working peens? - is her power unviable with women? - how does it interact with trans or intersex individuals? - what if the person doesn't reach completion or their completion doesn't involve fluids? - is it some weird powerplay on her end and actually it was all unnecessary theater the whole time? - are there man witch-healers and does their magic work the same way? - what is the function by which the evil "boiling, foaming magma" cum exits his body into her vagina, then gets expelled through her mouth? never once in the course of my nutrition degree and anatomy studies did we cover how that's an interconnected system. if anything you'd think they'd be using the anus so it can travel through the colon, intestines, stomach, and then esophagus to get to the mouth...
edit edit: oh yeah. and I did a search for the witch-healer's name in the rest of the book. about 250 pages after boning her and commenting how she's in her fifties but really beautiful you-gotta-believe-me-she's-not-wrinkly-and-gross-at-all, he hopes to get her pregnant.
and like... idk man. "in her fifties" seems like she's 51-59yo, not just turned 50, ya know? and the World Health Organization says most women go through menopause between 45-55. so like... it's not totally impossible, I guess? but just kinda wild and at the very least I'd be super confident she's going through perimenopause at a minimum. kinda hard to conceive then, ya know?
and combined with the vagina to mouth pipeline I commented on above, it all feels very r/badwomensanatomy. ------------------------- DNF @ 27%
This is the kind of bland "Fantasy" where I always feel duped. See, probably my favourite thing about the Fantasy genre is the world-building. I want to be immersed in an unrealistic world that can never happen. I want to constantly feel the effects of the minor changes that have happened that make this world unlike our own. Ideally I also want cool characters having worthwhile adventures and memorable conversations, but at least the world-building, ya know? Not just a regular book in a vaguely medieval fake setting. Be fantastical, dammit!
I've read a quarter of this book and genuinely can't tell you what happened. Some standing around here, some discussion of loss of magic there, a weird sex scene where a guy like passed out and woke up to a beautiful woman bouncing on his junk and apparently healing his wounds with her magic vagina? (really important to keep emphasizing how beautiful she is and that she's ~50 but doesn't look it cause she's so beautiful and well nourished), some skirmishes between unimportant people I have no stake in as they fought through the trees...
I just keep zoning out and reminding myself to pay attention... then almost immediately zoning out again. Zero intrigue for me.
------------------------------- You have full control of the world, my dude... why would you write a magic system where she uses her vagina to pull the disease and ailments out of him as he cums, then she cums and spits it out? Why would you do that? It's so, so weird, my dude. Like legit... why can't she just use her hand? Why does she have to use her vagina on his penis in particular? Why are you referencing Saxan and pagans and doing their culture dirty like this?
Why do you have to write it where she's just "a woman" for ages even though he's had her in his employ for a decade and specifically rode here to see her and receive exactly this kind of welcome? Who is this for? That's just weird titillation for the audience and not at all how the character would be acting. STOP BEING SO WEIRD. No one forced you to make this up! Or to convey it in this manner!
He was not alone.
A woman sat astride him, riding him to the hilt. She too was naked, and her milk-pale skin was covered in an intricate network of geometric tattoos. She moved not with the wild passion of a young woman in love, nor with the false overexuberance of a prostitute; rather, she did so deliberately and with great concentration, chanting in a low voice in rhythm to the rise and fall of her hips, each slap of her buttocks against his thighs a drumbeat.
Need to make sure you really know she's not an uggo, tho:
She walked slowly across the chamber. She was an undeniably beautiful woman, imperious and regal in spite of her lowborn origins. Like von Oldenburg, she was in her fifties, but thanks to a decade living off a castle larder, the only lines that marked her skin were the faded geometric tattoos of a Draedist. Even clad in a blouse patterned with embroidered wildflowers and a simple blue kirtle � peasant clothing � she looked more like a queen in the midst of some act of subterfuge, rather than the pagan witch-healer she was.
Hi, future-me. This weird scene kinda starts on pg 90ish of the ebook, and really kicks off on pg 92....more
Fairly bland, rote YA Romantasy. The synopsis compared this to Howl's Moving Castle, and it also reminded me quite a bit of Uprooted, so I figured I'dFairly bland, rote YA Romantasy. The synopsis compared this to Howl's Moving Castle, and it also reminded me quite a bit of Uprooted, so I figured I'd give it a try. ------------------------------ TL;DR I'd recommend Into the Heartless Wood. It basically does everything happening here AND adds: lore, character development, backstory, politics, a war, action sequences, stakes, and a very unique voice+format to how the alternating chapters are written. It's still a YA romantasy with stolen hearts and (view spoiler)[the royalty's crafted, monstrous daughters who also function as the LI (hide spoiler)], still has a father relationship, and still has almost 100% the exact same plot for the king. It also has lovely prose and manages to be ~100 pages shorter! ------------------------------ There is absolutely no reason this needed to be a nearly 500 pg tome. Nearly nothing happens for the whole book, the characters have very little personality and development, and "mysteries" are dragged out for ages when they already held next to no intrigue.
- There's a war but we don't talk about it. (Who are the enemies? How long has it been going? What started the war? Who/where are the soldiers?) - There's a king but we don't talk about it. (Where are the politics? Where is the court? Who does the king talk to? How does he give orders and what do they contain? Why do they have a king at all and what does he do?) - There's a village but we don't talk about it. (How did she grow up? What is the culture? She just keeps repeating 2 things: she believes herself to be very ugly & everyone is scared of having their heart taken.) - There's a magic system and while we do talk about it (a LOT), we don't talk about it outside of a single use case and we also don't otherwise use it. (They need to take hearts from the peasants to power their magic... what magic? What does the magic do? How is it used? Why is it worth the sacrifice?)
There's no culture and no richness and no history. The MC loves her father but why should I care? I'm never shown enough to love him and be invested in their relationship. Does she even have a single other friend or family member or long-standing relationship with a single person in her village? I'm inclined to believe no. And the MMC is a sexy-born-yesterday love interest who therefore also has nothing to offer. Everything is so static and exists in a vacuum to serve the most basic and unoriginal of story premises, but I never felt any heart.
Honestly this feels like fanfiction turned trad, because without the IP it was originally based on it has absolutely nothing.
The cat is somewhat fun? But not nearly as much as the author thinks (though I do appreciate that he continues to have prominence and be shoe-horned into scenes instead of sidelined like a lot of books with animal companions do)....more
Can't say this one did anything for me. It was a pleasant enough audiobook to listen to, but nothing about it was super engrossing or memorable.
If youCan't say this one did anything for me. It was a pleasant enough audiobook to listen to, but nothing about it was super engrossing or memorable.
If you just want some standard Romance to fill your time with, something that won't make a huge impact but helps to pass the time, then I guess I'd recommend this?
Doesn't really do anything wrong either, don't get me wrong, it's just... fine....more
Well, I picked this up because I heard it was a comedy. I'm not quite sure I agree with that reviewer or that we have the same sense of humor, lolHmm.
Well, I picked this up because I heard it was a comedy. I'm not quite sure I agree with that reviewer or that we have the same sense of humor, lol.
On the one hand this was better than the other Nigerian family drama I read earlier this year. On the other hand, I completely don't understand the constant drive by all the characters to just start making babies???
But to sum the main thesis up in two words: men suck....more
I often wonder how future history classes will talk about our moment in time, given more distance and clear connections: the way algorithms have creatI often wonder how future history classes will talk about our moment in time, given more distance and clear connections: the way algorithms have created the "Red Feed"/"Blue Feed" phenomenon that drives wedges between people, how our user data is weaponized by advertisers and politicians alike, if the future will view these social media sites as a net positive or net negative for humanity.
Resources: The rest of this review is specifically about the book and my experience with it. But I wanted to take a moment to at least let people know about the documented WAR CRIMES Facebook committed and that you can find more succinct, better reporting with more documentation even just on Wikipedia under "Facebook content management controversies: War Crimes."
Follow-up link in that wiki:
The Weak Tea: Okay, so this book was way more mild than I genuinely thought it'd be. And it's not even like most of the information presented was unknown, so I'm actually curious what Zucks was trying to block from being published.
No, she's not looking to paint anyone but herself in a good light. She frequently points out the sexism and "boys club" atmosphere of working at the company, and the way her bosses seem like naïve and petulant children who are too insulated by their money and the "yes men" they're surrounded by to understand or care about basic ethics or anything not catering to their egos.
Of course, this is also pretty obvious by watching their company practices and media appearances, so no big surprise.
One New Fact: One thing that kinda surprised me to learn, but also seemed like an obvious course of action once she mentioned it, was that Zucks apparently learned the wrong lessons from how much Facebook affected Trump winning... enough that he now has his own aspirations for becoming President.
Ew. No.
The Atrocities of Facebook: The memoir also really didn't cover the genocide in Myanmar and Facebook's role in it as much as I thought it would. Like... these are genuine war crimes! I thought Rebecca Watson did a much better job covering this in a shorter time (only 12 minutes!) in her video "Mark Zuckerberg Preps for More Ethnic Cleansing" which you can watch .
When the incentive of the corporation is to make money for their shareholders, and there's no oversight or enforcement of ethics and morals, this sort of dystopic conclusion is a feature, not a bug.
Kinda Weird Anti-Semitism Vibes Around 92% In, I Really Question This Inclusion:
“Sarah, you know your boss Joel. He’s a Jew who went to Harvard.â€� “Yes,â€� I said uneasily, worried that we’re drifting into some anti-Semitic conversation I don’t want to be part of. “And his boss.â€� “E±ô±ô¾±´Ç³Ù.â€� “Yes—a Jew who went to Harvard; and his boss â€� a Jew who went to Harvard. And her boss…â€� “A Jew who dropped out of Harvard?â€� I venture. “You’re catching on,â€� he said. “So you see, one of these things is not like the other.â€� “You mean me?â€� “Yeah,â€� he said. “You’re not like these people. And you’ll never be like them. And the sooner you grasp this, the better.â€�
The Author: I left the quote above untouched, but I think it's really emblematic of a running issue I had with the book. See, the author wants you to know that she's a good person and has always been a good person, and everything she did for Facebook was against her will. She was aware that the conversation was anti-Semitic and didn't want to be a part of it, you see! But like... babes... you coulda shut that conversation down, called out the dogwhistles for what they were, or -most importantly- not shoehorned it into your book. It really feels like they scrubbed it up in post by making sure you know she was "uneasy," because it otherwise paints her in a negative light. But it's exactly that for the whole book.
Time and time again I found myself questioning why the author kept working for the company or why she only spoke out now that she was fired. Sure, she mentions not wanting to be without health insurance while in between jobs in America... but she also casually mentions how she's worth millions of dollars because of her early shares in the company and owns a home in San Francisco with her husband. Ma'am, there are no operations or ongoing health issues that you could not afford to pay out of pocket 1000x over. Not to mention that her husband also works and she could just be added to his insurance. This is such a weak excuse that's trying to appeal to an everyman reading the book.
And somehow in every scenario she presented here, she was the only one who understood the implications and right course of action, yet also could never manage to convince anyone else at the company. She was a high-ranking employee of many years (since 2011) who directly knew and worked with Zuckerberg, yet was also so ineffectual at her job that she only managed to get him meetings with world leaders but never to affect policy that turned out to be very bad? You can't have it both ways where you're upper management and literally talking to world leaders, but also can't affect your own workplace in the slightest. And she always fell on the right side of history.
Sure, Jan.
From winning at Catan (and misusing the pop culture reference "Rosebud" as she soapbox'd) to being the only person interested in helping a woman mid-seizure... a lot of these anecdotes felt very fabricated. And when they weren't fabricated, well she's just a victim who was forced to organize a riot in a foreign country because Zuckerberg wanted to see one while they visited. You can't just be an adult and turn down or ignore unreasonable requests, you see!
If this book were an AITA post, I would absolutely award her an 'Everyone Sucks Here' badge.
Overall: Ultimately I think that this book will generate a lot of buzz and people may talk about the issues with Meta that have largely flown under the radar. I personally got off the platform in 2017 and haven't used any of the other sites they own. Given their willingness to capitulate to authoritarian governments, betrayal of user data and privacy, and how they specifically target people at their most vulnerable, I would encourage folks that if they take nothing else away from this book, it's time to divest from Meta. No more Facebook or Instagram or WhatsApp.
(Clearly I'm still tied to Amazon by using Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ, but I'm also currently researching alternatives to Amazon and Google in my personal use. We live in a society so it's challenging, but these tech companies are out of control and under-regulated.)
The Audiobook: The actual audiobook quality was fine, especially considering it was author narrated. Good sound quality and cadence. ----------------------- pre-read: As if the final hour announcement of this book that was still listed as "Flatiron Author" and "Untitled Flatiron" on sale sites couldn't get me intrigued enough... Zucks had to go and legally prohibit the author from promoting or distributing copies.
This book could've languished on my TBR for years, but now that my library hold has come through I dropped everything to read it.
Happy Streisand Effect, you corporate buffoons! [image]...more
edit 3/5/25: my friend just finished reading Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy and it reminded me how dumb the "Mind" challenge was in this book. ugh. edit 3/5/25: my friend just finished reading Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy and it reminded me how dumb the "Mind" challenge was in this book. ugh. now I'm annoyed again. -------------- I just summarized my book experience to Mr Shelf and he was like "oh! that reminds me of this book I read!"
...it was a children's book for children that he read as a child. ...more
And while dark academia is my favourite subgenre, I also just don't think I'm the target audience here. This is angsty. This is poetic.I DON'T GET IT.
And while dark academia is my favourite subgenre, I also just don't think I'm the target audience here. This is angsty. This is poetic. This is deep romantic feelings for fellow teens whom you've known for fewer than 2 weeks.
...There's also very little that actually happens, so as a plot-driven reader I felt lost the whole time. I'm also not sure it's really about characters either. It's mostly about vibes.
This book feels made for the Stephanie Garber girlies who want their metaphors to have fewer cupcakes and more musk and teeth and gravity.
I will at least grant them that there's some actual academia and classes happening here, but it also made me feel SO OLD that I'm sitting here while their Philosophy/English class is using The Matrix to discuss their deep discussions about the human condition. Wild.
Audiobook Notes: The audiobook was really well executed and very pleasant to listen to.
Thank you to Macmillan Audio for the audio ARC. All thoughts and opinions are my own....more
If I wasn't making little paintings while listening to this book, I probably wouldn't have finished it. It's very... easy to put on in the background?If I wasn't making little paintings while listening to this book, I probably wouldn't have finished it. It's very... easy to put on in the background? There's not a lot going on, though.
Like seriously, SO little happens in this book. Even for a Romantasy, the Romance aspect is hella weak. It's a little insane how long this book is for how absolutely nothing happens in it.
I had heard a reviewer talking about her other series and also remarking on how little happens in S&D. And now I get it....more
"What they say: call me. What they mean: it's your responsibility to let me know when I have to care."
A raw look at grief and guilt and generational tr
"What they say: call me. What they mean: it's your responsibility to let me know when I have to care."
A raw look at grief and guilt and generational trauma. The book is also a unique perspective on being Mexican American where you can be both too Mexican and not Mexican enough.
I thought this was very well done and poignant, even it was maybe operating on so many levels that it was a bit too smart for me.
Does the dog die?: (view spoiler)[So like... that's a matter of perspective and reality, I guess? Sorta yes, then it's alive again. But also I choose to believe no. Just know that it does emotionally tug on your heartstrings initially without being overly drawn out and explicit, but then turns into new horror? (hide spoiler)]...more
edit: ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh I just realized this is the same author as The Paradox Hotel, which sat on my TBR for a while and then I took it off after heariedit: ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh I just realized this is the same author as The Paradox Hotel, which sat on my TBR for a while and then I took it off after hearing reviews from people I trust with similar taste to me.
I should really work on remembering author names better so I'd have known not to pick this up. my bad --------------------- Not really a book made for me, but totally average.
If you have a dad who's really into John Wick but also likes stuff that's a little bit sillier, he'd be the perfect market for this book. The MC is a totally mediocre white guy who's super average looking, but also is the #1 best assassin ever, always comes out of situations unscratched and fully in charge, and every woman always wants to sleep with him. He's liked by the good guys, feared by the bad guys, and rarely has to reckon with what he's wrought.
It's like your standard wish fulfillment power fantasy, but he's reformed and retired and only gets dragged back in because he has to. He's got a cool guy nickname of 'the Pale Horse' (which mostly sounds kinda cringe and racist imo) and everyone's comparing him to Jason Statham non-stop. Also he has a cat and will remind you it's named 'P. Kitty' and every opportunity.
Audiobook Notes: For whatever reason, I find it harder to listen to male narrators than female ones. Initially this guy's dictation was kinda off-putting, but eventually I fell into the groove and stopped noticing. He wouldn't be my first choice, but my issues faded into the background after a few chapters....more
I honestly don't know how to rate a book like this so I'm gonna leave it unrated.
Here's my TLDR: - yes, I think it's worth reading - no, I don't think iI honestly don't know how to rate a book like this so I'm gonna leave it unrated.
Here's my TLDR: - yes, I think it's worth reading - no, I don't think it can/will change your worldview - there are good reminders and awareness - the beginning chapters have more concrete examples and things to incorporate in your life - they really wanted to hit an arbitrary 20, so some chapters are needlessly separated or far less fleshed out - likewise, some of the examples don't make much sense in the chapter they're in, they're just things he wanted to talk about - it was written before JKR truly went black mold brain, so there's a weird jumpscare in there - it's also got some other jumpscares with Churchill praise and weird American patriotism venerating military service people as war heroes
Things you should 100% do: - GET YOUR PASSPORT UPDATED YESTERDAY. NOW WILL SUFFICE IF YOURE RUNNING LATE - investigate charitable causes and then set up auto-pay on at least one - find a charity/resource you can physically participate in (if you're able) to be present and active in your community - talk to neighbours and co-workers and find common ground, even if your politics don't align - find and make international friends (discord servers, reddits, hell even Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ groups can help introduce you) - pre-establish your line in the sand and have a plan for what to do once it's crossed...more
I think there was a little too much morality/philosophy and what the meaning of "real magic" is, considering you have a giThis was a very cheesy romp.
I think there was a little too much morality/philosophy and what the meaning of "real magic" is, considering you have a giant hero who literally tore a man's jaw from his skull. And I've got reservations about the term "barbarian."
Otherwise this was pretty silly fun, and I liked the magic system and the monster....more
This was cute, but I think I have a harder time believing friends-to-lovers in general. The amount of time pining is too long and awkward, the leap frThis was cute, but I think I have a harder time believing friends-to-lovers in general. The amount of time pining is too long and awkward, the leap from friends to something more too sudden.
I think this reads too young for me, with a lot of very amateur ways to shoehorn in exposition.
The Scholomance taught me thDNF @ 33%, middle of ch 12
I think this reads too young for me, with a lot of very amateur ways to shoehorn in exposition.
The Scholomance taught me that I don't mind an exposition dump or having a Fantasy world explained to me, as long as the information I'm learning is interesting. But I feel like this is more explaining the thing that was just said? Making sure the reader is able to understand that the King is the Princess's dad, and also the Princess is from Place, therefore he's the King of Place. And I just didn't need a paragraph to interrupt the dialogue for the main character to piece that together?
And then there's a lot of "I'm not the person you think I am!" and replies of "You can't fool us. We know who you are!" And then later there's some "How much do you remember?" "Honestly not a thing." "Wow, you really don't remember anything, do you? Let me explain our entire backstory to you, person I don't trust and think killed my family."
And I could be onboard, maybe, if the info was then super interesting. But I'm just not vibing, sorry....more
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