Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ

17. This bit was my personal fav of this section of the book!

Karen, that was the whole quote, not what I wondered. lol (See what happens when I forget to include quotes around a quote? *giggle*):

"I wondered if that was true: if they were all really children wrapped in adult bodies, like children’s books hidden in the middle of dull, long adult books, the kind with no pictures or conversations."

Chapters 09-11, pages 122-178


16. There are so many food references in this book, and I especially liked the one about him sitting in the bath eating soup. Have any taken your fancy?

I liked one earlier describing stiring the jam into the porridge until it changed colour. I've never put jam in porridge, but what a great idea.

17. Old Mrs Hempstock got to "snipping and stitching" and removed that horrible evening. Did you like this concept?

Yes.

18. They were able to get the hole out of his foot, but what about the pain he also has in his chest?

They didn't get all of the hole out, it snapped and the last bit is still stuck inside his heart. That's why the tunnel wouldn't work and the cleaner birds are after him.

19. I loved the descriptions of the Hempstock home when he stayed the night. Did anything stick out to you?

It reminds me of other magical homes, like the school in Harry Potter that would change all the time and you could easily get lost. The kitten is from the other magical place and it knew where to go.

20. Lettie makes a boundary out of marbles, toys and dolls heads for the confrontation with Ursula. How did you feel about this confrontation and the hunger birds eating her? Ursula says "I never made any of them do anything". Does that mean that his father really is that cruel?

It seemed a bit too easy and she seemed so vunerable at the end I didn't hate her quite so much. Made me think that something even worse was coming - then the birds turned on him.

Maybe she didn't force people into doing things, just removed all their inhibitions and impulse control. How many parents out there have ever lost their patience with their kids. His dad was always saying how he had been beaten as a child and how he never did that - what would he do if his impulse control was gone? I don't think his dad is evil. I don't think he would have cheated on his wife, but without impulse control, finding Ursula attractive led straight to an affair.

21. Quote I liked

"Adults should not weep, I knew. They did not have mothers who would comfort them."

7. I do. I did so since forever.

9. I think it's some kind of supernatural power. Definitely not a human ability.

10. I think we live with the constant idea that kids have a wild imagination they can't control, but we should pay attention to them because they might just be able to see more than us.

11. She's a "immaterial" girl-thing in a material world. Kiddin. I think her powers have something to do with material desires.

16. @Renee - I always have my porridge with jam!

19. I loved it! Especially the parts with the moon.

20. Maybe he isn't necessarily cruel, he wanted to do something violent to the boy, but not really drown him. Maybe she just intensified his intentions.

haha whoops Lisarenee - I have updated :)

@Renee

16. That is pretty yummy. Maybe it is an English thing

19. Yes me too

20. I like your theory. It is hard to imagine drowning your own child though *shudder*

21. I love that one too

---------------------

@Andreea

11. lol! now I have that song stuck in my head ;)

19. yes, the moon was great

Oho,I think I may have got to the morals part of the story.

My reading? Neil views himself as this boy, with a gateway in his heart to all the magical worlds that his stories come from and open into.

Nicole wrote: "Oho,I think I may have got to the morals part of the story.

My reading? Neil views himself as this boy, with a gateway in his heart to all the magical worlds that his stories come from and open into."

Nice thought perhaps this is his tell all book? I think he tries to make his adult books like the books he loved as a child. There's always something whimsical and a little dark to them and never are they boring.

Nicole wrote: "Oho,I think I may have got to the morals part of the story.

My reading? Neil views himself as this boy, with a gateway in his heart to all the magical worlds that his stories come from and open into."

Neil has openly admitted that this is his most autobiographical work.

Renee said, "but the father was definately "having" Ursula."

lol Very true.

Renee said, " it is a parasite. A creature that feeds off another.

Yes, very true and he also uses the term flea for Ursula which also feeds of people.

Renee said, "The description of the book on goodreads refered to it as a fable.

You know, I very rarely read the book description before reading the books of authors I know. I find them too spoilery and sometimes they give the wrong information. Plus, I don't like to discover things on my own.

Anima said, "I think there is a lot in Gaiman's story. I find these layers very intriguing and due to them I tend to come back to this book searching for more clues.

I agree. You can tell he puts a lot of thought behind his books.

Cristina said, I think Ursula is the personification of greed, the want for more.

I was debating if it was greed as well, but couldn't figure out how Ursula came in to play. I guess that could definitely be the wish to have more...more than one woman perhaps?

Ashley Marie, I had read that as well, but until this point, I was a little bit confused as to why.

I absolutely love this as an origin tale, though. Scratch that, I love this as just existing.

Nicole wrote: "Ashley Marie, I had read that as well, but until this point, I was a little bit confused as to why.

I absolutely love this as an origin tale, though. Scratch that, I love this as just existing."

Ditto :)

Phew. Just finished it in a marathon. Could not put it down. Definitely in the top five best books of the year.

Thank you all for being around me for this read.

I enjoyed this book - but it didn't make my top list for the year.

So late. It came to the library a bit after I would have preferred.

Questions and comments
Chapters: Prologue-04, pages 01-62

1. I liked the introductory quote from Maurice Sendak. This seems to be setting up the theme of the book which is similar to the main theme of Coraline. What do you think of this concept of children being braver than adults would want them to be?
I think it's all about how kids wish that they had more control in their lives. So this gives them the control to influence what's going on around them.

2. Is this your first Neil Gaiman book? What do you think of the writing style and the subtle descriptions? Do you like how we start with a Prologue and then go back to when the narrator is 7?
Here is a picture of a lane with Hazel trees on both sides:
Read Coraline too. It's pretty similar but I'm liking this one more. The Prologue was a bit strange for me.


3. The narrator doesn't seem to have a name yet. Is there a significance to this?
I imagine it's to give it the every kid type feeling. It was even a bit hard to figure out the gender since it's so neutral.

4. One of the interesting ways NG writes, for me, is maneuvering our emotions deftly and describing a usually tragic situation with subtle humour. For example, the scene of the child abandoned at his seventh birthday I found so sad and I was surprised that soon after when he described that the dead Fluffy being replaced by Monster I was smiling rather than horrified. Are you finding humour in the book so far?
It feels like it's about a child's ability to live in the moment. They tend not to worry about the details far in the future. Plus they're so used to not being able to influence much in their life they have to accept things. I think morbid humor is a valid way of dealing with tragedy.

5. The Hemstock ladies are interesting. They seem to have some kind of psychic abilities and speak "in the language of shaping". What are your thoughts on them? Are they witches or spirits or deities, or can they not be categorised?
Suppose I'd go more with earth spirits. They seem to understand the way of things.

6. Do you think that the narrator catching the "thing" thrown at him "from the centre of the flapping canvas" will have a lasting impact? What could it be?
It seems like all of it has a lasting impact since he states he remembers all of it in the Prologue. Maybe more coins?

Questions, thoughts, and comments
Chapters 12-Epilogue

22. I love the idea of the hunger birds. Is there anything scarier than shadows that you can only just see as having a form out of the corner of your eye? Gaiman writes, "I have never been as frightened as I was in that grass circle....There was nothing to scare me but shadows." This idea really resonated with me. Do you think that this idea of being scared of things we can't truly see/understand is a universal one?

23. One of the themes that really stood out to me was the idea that adults consistently lie to children (both intentionally and unintentionally). Do you think this is true? If so, are we doing children a favor? This idea brought me full circle back to the opening Sendak quote.

24. Annihilation is a pretty steep price to pay for letting go of someone's hand. Do you feel like it's more effective than simply having the narrator's life at risk?

25. I love that one of the things the narrator repeats to himself is the Mouse's Tale from Alice in Wonderland. Why do you think Gaiman chose this particular passage from that particular story? What connections do you see between Alice and the narrator, if any?
If you're interested, here's the formatting/complete text of the poem from the original (I hope Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ doesn't eat my spacing!):
Fury said to a mouse, That he met in the house, "Let us both go to law: I will prosecute
YOU. --Come,
I'll take no
denial; We
must have a
trial: For
really this
morning I've
nothing
to do."
Said the
mouse to the
cur, "Such
a trial,
dear Sir,
With
no jury
or judge,
would be
wasting
our
breath."
"I'll be
judge, I'll
be jury,"
Said
cunning
old Fury:
"I'll
try the
whole
cause,
and
condemn
you
to
death."'
EDIT: Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ did eat my spacing. If you're interested in the way it was typeset to mimic the Mouse's tail, you can find it here.

26. Not really a question, but I chuckled at the narrator's fear of being sold to anatomy. It's my new favorite threat to everyone I know who has read the book. If someone steals the last can of pop from the fridge, they get sold to anatomy in my house now!

27. The focus on food was mentioned in a previous question set. Do you think this is what the narrator associates with comfort?

28. If you've read Coraline, do you see connections in these two stories? For me, Ocean is the grown up version of Coraline. Do you agree or disagree? Gaiman also often says that he feels his stories are gendered (not in the sense that all people can't enjoy them, just that they feel like the stories themselves have a gender). Do you think Ocean is a "male" book or a "female" book?

29. Gaiman decided to market this book to adults instead of as a YA novel because he felt it lacked a sense of hope. Do you think this is true?

30. Last question, I promise! What did you think? Love, like, or loathe? Will you be joining us for the buddy read of The Graveyard Book next month?

22. Definitely! I believe this is one of the most universal fears, very often a motivation of huge conflicts and "battles" (even those connected to rasism and intolerance take roots in the fear of unknown).


27. I think having a full belly is one of the most basic human needs, so it can be easily assosiated with comfort to me.

28. I would say that Ocean is a male book, while Coraline is a female one. But I also think that there are more differences than just the gender. I would also claim that here a family is not that important as friendship and kinship with a person the same age, while in Coraline it was more of uncovering the deeper bond with a family. But there are some similarities as well, ei. fighting with "evil".
29. Hmm. To be honest I find this book full of hope. First of all, the boy won the battle with "evil", it was on the expanse of the life of his best friend, but still the battle was won. Secondly, he has the place to come back in important, difficult moments of his life to get the space to think and a piece of advice from friendly "beings". Finally, his girlfriend is due to come back in some time, so I think there is still hope for their reunion. All in all, lots of hope for me in this read.

30. I will definitely join this buddy read, I loved that book and I'm very curious about others' views !!!

@Kelly

Np. It doesn't take long to read anyhow :)

3. True. I guess a 7 year old isn't that "masculine" either

5. Nice ;)

Chapters 12-Epilogue

22. Oh so scary. I loved that the child could work out what was happening and not fall for the "tricks" to get him out of the circle

23. It is true because we feel we are doing it for "their own good" and in many cases I agree. Children should not have the burden of truth that adults often carry. It is that one time in your life when someone else should shelter you from it. Naturally there are instances where as hard as it is, the truth should be told (e.g. explaning the death of a pet is a very important life experience, rather than the pet "ran away")

24. Ah yeah, that was pretty big! haha

25. Cool! I assumed that NG loved that story as a child (but I'm sure you can confirm that Ashley Marie!)

26. lol!!

27. Comfort, trust, family.. . Don't we all? Food is a primal motiator that gives us all those good things

28. I do agree that this is more of an adult version. I'm quite looking forward to our next NG book now to see how it compares. I don't know I'd give this a gender. I think the book is universal and crosses those gender lines

29. Like Anima, I felt there was hope in this. However, unlike Coraline, the narrator will never really remember/understand what happened and that is sad

30. I really enjoyed this. I think I appreciated it more reading with all of you and I can't wait for the Graveyard Book!

Questions and comments
Chapters 09-11, pages 122-178


16. There are so many food references in this book, and I especially liked the one about him sitting in the bath eating soup. Have any taken your fancy?
I liked the apple pie with custard. I want to make apple pie now.

17. Old Mrs Hempstock got to "snipping and stitching" and removed that horrible evening. Did you like this concept?
Very interesting concept. It was more like she removed the memory from the father's head and replace it with something else.

19. I loved the descriptions of the Hempstock home when he stayed the night. Did anything stick out to you?
It seemed like a magical house. I really loved the full moon.

Chapters 12-Epilogue

22. I love the idea of the hunger birds. Is there anything scarier than shadows that you can only just see as having a form out of the corner of your eye? Gaiman writes, "I have never been as frightened as I was in that grass circle....There was nothing to scare me but shadows." This idea really resonated with me. Do you think that this idea of being scared of things we can't truly see/understand is a universal one?

So many kids are scared of the dark, I was too. Fear of the unknown is definately a universal fear. People often let their imaginations run wild and imagine worst case scenarios, though I think those birds were pretty scary, don't think i would imagine anything worse than that...

23. One of the themes that really stood out to me was the idea that adults consistently lie to children (both intentionally and unintentionally). Do you think this is true? If so, are we doing children a favor? This idea brought me full circle back to the opening Sendak quote.

Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy. Are we doing kids a favour with these ones? With all the stranger danger we teach them, then tell them some stranger will break into our house and interfere with our stuff, and by the way you should go and sit on that old man's lap, who you've never met before... No wonder my kids are scared of Santa too. But I still do it all, chew bits off carrots etc.

24. Annihilation is a pretty steep price to pay for letting go of someone's hand. Do you feel like it's more effective than simply having the narrator's life at risk?

Definately raises the stakes. I liked how the Hempstocks never blamed him for anything even though he blamed himself.

25. I love that one of the things the narrator repeats to himself is the Mouse's Tale from Alice in Wonderland. Why do you think Gaiman chose this particular passage from that particular story? What connections do you see between Alice and the narrator, if any?

"I'll try the whole cause and condem you to death" Maybe the narrator thought he deserved to die. Alice was just a normal girl who had an extrodinary experience in a magical world and a brush with death, similar to the narrators experience.


26. Not really a question, but I chuckled at the narrator's fear of being sold to anatomy. It's my new favorite threat to everyone I know who has read the book. If someone steals the last can of pop from the fridge, they get sold to anatomy in my house now!

I loved that reference too, smiled when it came up again near the end of the book. I relate to it because I actually studied anatomy and disected a cadaver.

27. The focus on food was mentioned in a previous question set. Do you think this is what the narrator associates with comfort?

All the food described is warm comfort food. He was always feeling really hungry when they fed him too.

28. If you've read Coraline, do you see connections in these two stories? For me, Ocean is the grown up version of Coraline. Do you agree or disagree? Gaiman also often says that he feels his stories are gendered (not in the sense that all people can't enjoy them, just that they feel like the stories themselves have a gender). Do you think Ocean is a "male" book or a "female" book?

It's narated in a male voice, but there are more female characters than male. It feels more male to me though.

29. Gaiman decided to market this book to adults instead of as a YA novel because he felt it lacked a sense of hope. Do you think this is true?

It's not a fairytale where everyone lives happily ever after, quite dark. Lots of other adult themes in it too.

30. Last question, I promise! What did you think? Love, like, or loathe? Will you be joining us for the buddy read of The Graveyard Book next month?

I don't usually go for dark or horror type books, but i did enjoy this. Might try The Graveyard Book, see what mood I'm in by then.

I just started this today; this week was crazy! I didn't realize I had a different version, so I'm already a bit into Day 2, but I'm going to do the Day 1 Qs anyway.

1. Chidren don't have perspective yet, because they have no life experience, so they don't really know what's normal and what's not. That makes things so much scarier, but also makes scary things less scary sometimes (like the worm in the foot thing!). Great quote.

2. This is my fourth Gaiman - I read American Gods, then Good Omens, then Coraline, all earlier this year. I don't love how this started with him as an adult, but I do think it makes the premise more interesting. Not only is Gaiman playing with how children see the world differently than adults do - he's also making us question how we remember things.

3. I hadn't even noticed that! Oops. I don't think his sister or his parents have names either, do they? Just the people on the farm and the nanny.

4. It's definitely funny. I loved that he was the bakery's "first book." I didn't find the party thing too sad because he didn't; he wasn't surprised and didn't seem too interested in other kids. It gave me a twinge when he said after Fluffy died that he just wanted to be left alone so he could cry. I remember that feeling.

5. Hemstock ladies are amazing. I love how they say all this whacky stuff nonchalantly like they're talking about the weather.

@Sheri & Cristina RE: Q #4 - I agree. The kitten thing was the worst.

Waiting to read the other comments until I'm farther in the book...

@Kaitlin
Yes, the versions can always be a bit tricky as I generaly don't get the US version here

2. That is true, his books really test your memory!

3. Oh perhaps! Did they have surnames? I will have to check now :)

5. lol. yes me too

7. Yes. I love being off the path. I think reading and expanding your mind is a great way to do that. It's easy to be close-minded and follow a routine when your perspective of the world is limited.

10. Sometimes they're dismissed too easily. I was a nervous kid and thought too much, so it was important to me that adults believed me. Luckily I had some really solid people in my life who I knew were on my side no matter what. I think all kids need that.

11. I think Ursula is the evil stepmother (I mean, right now she's just the mistress, but she's playing that kind of role).

12. I thought it was weird that he cared about his tie. I didn't take the "looking good" thing as vanity, though. To me that's just a thing people say to be goofy or just as habit at the end of a routine.

13. I liked that one too. He's very resourceful. It definitely shows how impressionable kids can be, though.

14. Of course. But I think kids feel that way about everyone, to a degree. They're still getting used to everything, and it's hard if everything keeps changing.

15. I'm not sure yet. Maybe it's about the narrator figuring out how to function as an individual in society. It seems like this is his first experience with outside friends. I think it shows how life is frightening when he doesn't have a book in front of him (one of the things Ursula threatened was that he wouldn't have his stories), so everything must seem foreign in the world outside his books.

@Kaitlin
7. very true
10. I think all kids like that :)
15. nice thought

22. Of course! I am still scared of "shadows" like when mind plays tricks on you and you think you saw something in the corner of your eye and then you look and it's nothing there...

23. Yes, we lie to children a lot but I don't know if we are really doing them a favor. I go along with lies when it comes to the little kids in the family because I respect their parents' decisions. But I still don't know if I'll do the same with my kids (and I am not close to having kids right now...).

27. Definitely. Don't we all?

28. I didn't really think about Coraline while I was reading the book. They aren't written for the same public, but they aren't that different.

29. I don't think I read YA... so I don't really know.

30. I really liked it. Especially because the supernatural effects, the magic and everything peculiar wasn't explained in the end, and that kinda makes it more real for me.

I am in for The Graveyard Book!!

Questions and Comments for Chapters 5 - 8

7. "Adults follow paths. Children explore. Adults are content to walk the same way, hundreds of times, or thousands; perhaps it never occurs to adults to step off the paths, to creep beneath rhododendrons, to find the spaces between fences." I rather liked this statement. Do you ever take time to step off the path?
I think you end up so busy as an adult that it's hard to. There's also a lot more risk in stepping off the path the older you get.

8. Should the boy have killed the worm after all? I wonder if it would be possible? Do you like the symbolism Gaiman uses by making the monster a worm--a term used to describe someone as a weak or despicable person?
Could just be that it's something that likes to burrow in things.

9. What kind of hold does Ursula have on his father to make a man who won't hit his children try to drown one? The whole tub scene was pretty scary. Do you think if the boy hadn't managed to get a hold of his father's tie things would have ended differently?
It seems strange that he wouldn't have hit his kid if he's that much under her control. Maybe it helped to snap him out of it.

10. If the boy tried to describe what was going on to a grownup it would all easily be dismissed as something his childhood mind had conjured up. Do you think adults should listen a little closer to what children say? Are they often dismissed too easily?
I imagine some kids concerns are dismissed but honestly, if your kid came to you and said their nanny was a monster you'd be thinking mean or abusive, not supernatural.

11. The scene in the library would be an awful sight for a boy to witness. I'm surprised how quickly Ursula got her claws into everyone. Do you think Ursula/the monster is the personification of selfish desires?
She made a comment about money being the path to happiness which is the contrary to the old saying. It could be something like that.

12. We know that the boy's father was a little vain because at the beginning of the story he was remembered as saying, "looking good" to his own reflection. Could the story of the beautiful young man the narcissi were named after be Gaiman's clever way of giving us a better insight of the boy's father? Was Ursula, described as being very pretty, a reflection of the father rather like the pond reflected narcissus' own image back?
She seems to have snared him awfully fast if this is the first type of thing.

13. "Growing up, I took so many cues from books. They taught me most of what I knew about what people did, about how to behave. They were my teachers and my advisors." Another quote I liked. Did you like the way the boy used what he'd learned?
Books are a great way to broaden your knowledge beyond what your local community offers.

14. "My parents were a unit, inviolate. The future had suddenly become unknowable: anything could happen: the train of my life had jumped the rails and headed off across the fields and was coming down the lane with me, then." I think Gaiman captured beautifully how children feel about their parents. They're their security, stability, and rock. Take one or both away and they feel less rooted.
They say that's why kids act out most around their parent's since they know that that part of their life is stable.

15. Is anyone else getting the idea this will be a tale with a message behind it? In the first section the strange canvas like creature claims it was approached by someone saying, "That they were simple creatures, and all any of them want is money, just money, and nothing more." Plus, there were all the stories of the people in the area needing money. I'm thinking it will have something to do with happiness or money. What do you think?
There's a lot with all those coins too. Maybe it's the coins making people do evil things.

Questions and comments
Chapters 09-11, pages 122-178


16. There are so many food references in this book, and I especially liked the one about him sitting in the bath eating soup. Have any taken your fancy?
I liked the burnt toast one

17. Old Mrs Hempstock got to "snipping and stitching" and removed that horrible evening. Did you like this concept?
That's something a lot of people would like to be able to do.

18. They were able to get the hole out of his foot, but what about the pain he also has in his chest?
Maybe he has to heal that himself?

19. I loved the descriptions of the Hempstock home when he stayed the night. Did anything stick out to you?
I liked the lack of electricity except the new kitchen.

20. Lettie makes a boundary out of marbles, toys and dolls heads for the confrontation with Ursula. How did you feel about this confrontation and the hunger birds eating her? Ursula says "I never made any of them do anything". Does that mean that his father really is that cruel?
Everyone has a capacity to be cruel.

21. Here are a few quotes that Lisarenee really liked:
Lettie shrugged. “Nobody actually looks like what they really are on the inside. You don’t. I don’t. People are much more complicated than that. It’s true of everybody.�

“Monsters come in all shapes and sizes. Some of them are things people are scared of. Some of them are things that look like things people used to be scared of a long time ago. Sometimes monsters are things people should be scared of, but they aren’t.�

She finds what they think they need and she tries to give it to them. She’s doing it to make the world into something she’ll be happier in. Somewhere more comfortable for her. Somewhere cleaner. And she doesn’t care so much about giving them money, not anymore. Now what she cares about more is people hurting.�

"I wondered if that was true: if they were all really children wrapped in adult bodies, like children’s books hidden in the middle of dull, long adult books, the kind with no pictures or conversations."

Lisarenee commented that last one be a hint at what Gaiman tried to do?

It might help him understand why the adults in his life are doing things he doesn't like or when they make mistakes.

Questions, thoughts, and comments
Chapters 12-Epilogue

22. Definitely. People are afraid of change and the unknowable. I think that's totally natural because once you've seen or done something already, what's to be afraid of later?

23. I didn't notice that as one of the themes this book, though I sure did of Coraline. The narrator's parents are pretty much just phantoms, and the other adults are straight with him.

24. I thought of the hand thing as more like children feeling responsible for things over which they have no control. So like when their parents get a divorce or have a fight, or when one of the parents leaves, it's common for the child to feel at fault.

25. I thought that was so creepy, but it relates well to the narrator's situation. He's dragged into a situation with which he has pretty much nothing to do, and he has little say in the outcome.

26. Definitely. That showed how it's important for adults to try to explain the world to children in a way they can understand. We can't assume they know things.

27. I think he associates fear with food, given what he said about being forced to eat things he doesn't like at school. And at home we don't see him eat at all, except stolen fruit. So what a big juxtaposition that is with these huge, homestyle meals he's having at the Hempstocks'.

28. I found this book less frightening than I found Coraline, actually. And it doesn't quite feel like a book for adults, except that it is wrapped in an adult's narration. I did think Coraline was easier to understand as a fable (i.e. the moral was quite clear to me).

29. It's dark, surely.

30. Really like. Yes, I'm going to make sure to get a copy in my hands! Though I didn't comment much, I really enjoyed reading everyone's comments!

Questions, thoughts, and comments
Chapters 12-Epilogue

22. I love the idea of the hunger birds. Is there anything scarier than shadows that you can only just see as having a form out of the corner of your eye? Gaiman writes, "I have never been as frightened as I was in that grass circle....There was nothing to scare me but shadows." This idea really resonated with me. Do you think that this idea of being scared of things we can't truly see/understand is a universal one?
I have to admit that I am sometimes scared if I see a shadow moving out of the corner of my eye. I think that most people are scared by what they cannot understand, but with time our knowledge evolve and some things become understandable.

23. One of the themes that really stood out to me was the idea that adults consistently lie to children (both intentionally and unintentionally). Do you think this is true? If so, are we doing children a favor? This idea brought me full circle back to the opening Sendak quote.
I haven't noticed it in the book. I guess it depends on the lie.

24. Annihilation is a pretty steep price to pay for letting go of someone's hand. Do you feel like it's more effective than simply having the narrator's life at risk?
I think he's still paying the price for letting go of Lettie's hand, because he still feels guilty, and it's hard to live a life with guilt. Some moments can be decisive for someone's life, even though they aren't in someone's control. In this case, is the narrator to blame for letting go? Not really because it was involuntary. Could have Lettie prevented it? Maybe, maybe not. Some things we must learn to live with.

25. I love that one of the things the narrator repeats to himself is the Mouse's Tale from Alice in Wonderland. Why do you think Gaiman chose this particular passage from that particular story? What connections do you see between Alice and the narrator, if any?
There is a connection between Alice and the narrator as they both have seen fantastical things, not all people see.

27. The focus on food was mentioned in a previous question set. Do you think this is what the narrator associates with comfort?
Yes, he definitely associates food with comfort and safety. Which I think it's true for most people.

28. If you've read Coraline, do you see connections in these two stories? For me, Ocean is the grown up version of Coraline. Do you agree or disagree? Gaiman also often says that he feels his stories are gendered (not in the sense that all people can't enjoy them, just that they feel like the stories themselves have a gender). Do you think Ocean is a "male" book or a "female" book?
I haven't read Coraline. I would say Ocean seems more like a "female" book because of the Hempstock ladies.

29. Gaiman decided to market this book to adults instead of as a YA novel because he felt it lacked a sense of hope. Do you think this is true?
If it was a YA novel, it would have probably ended with Lettie coming back. The way it ends you get the feel that the narrator is forgetting his visit again, that he still feels guilt and will probably come back again. So, there is a lack of hope.

30. Last question, I promise! What did you think? Love, like, or loathe? Will you be joining us for the buddy read of The Graveyard Book next month?
I liked it. There were a lot of interesting concepts, and it gets your own imagination going by not fully explaining everything. If I have time, I'll join on that read too :)

7. "Adults follow paths. Children explore... Do you ever take time to step off the path?
I loved this, too. I stick to the path where I fear the failure or simply am doing what I must, like when I’m cooking � I never deviate from recipes. But where I have curiosity or a passion, I am apt to wander. In my work, we say, “ask WHY five times.�

8. Should the boy have killed the worm after all? Do you like the symbolism... as a weak or despicable person?
I didn’t think of the worm in those terms. I guess I thought of it more in terms of parasites, like tapeworms or hookworms.

9. What kind of hold does Ursula have on his father...
The tub scene was really the most frightening in the book for me. I think his father would have drowned him. It seemed to me that Ursula had somehow mesmerized him, rather than that she was controlling him. It’s as though his parents were in a sort of dream, where the things they saw and did were a distorted version of reality. The father attempted to drown his son as punishment, but he still did not hit him. And in this state, that seemed perfectly reasonable to him.

10. If the boy tried to describe what was going on to a grownup it would all easily be dismissed as something his childhood mind had conjured up. Do you think adults should listen a little closer to what children say? Are they often dismissed too easily?
I think it’s hard for adults to hear what children say, because they perceive and interpret the world through the filter of their imaginations and within the context of their limited experiences. Most adults have forgotten how to think as a child does.

11. The scene in the library would be an awful sight ... personification of selfish desires?
I don’t know. His mother is happy because Ursula will look after the house and her children while she works at a new job that will bring in money the family needs. His sister is happy because Ursula is her friend. His father is happy because Ursula makes him feel desirable at a time when he no longer can support his family and his wife has to take a job. You could say that these are selfish desires because money is tied to his mother’s job and the sister’s purse and the father’s sexual desires. But I’m not sure. I wonder if there’s a connection between the choice to drown his son in the bathtub while his wife is off raising money to dig wells for people who need water.

13. "Growing up, I took so many cues from books. They taught me most of what I knew about what people did, about how to behave. They were my teachers and my advisors."
I liked this quote too. It can be a cautionary tale as well. I was also influenced by the books I read as a child, but sometimes I learned things that I later had to un-learn.