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Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage

So far, the main character is not colorless in himself because he learns his interests/pleasures/assets (railroad station structures; facility for languages) and successfully pursues them career wise. In high school, he is motivated to do well but not too well to stand out. He is differently colorful from his high-school friends, not only by name but by his life choices. The consequences of diverging from group identity to pursue self identity is the basis for his anxiety in his memory, as he pursues a unique path at university. Murakami also endows the main character with a special physical trait, the sensitive pressure point of his back, which promotes vivid images. Overall, the main character is deceptively colorless.

I also found it very interesting that the Japanese apparently take such notice of one's surname and how careful his father was to make sure his given name wouldn't weigh on him throughout life.

Neither of the main character's names Tsukuru Tazaki is on lists of commonly found Japanese surnames, so he's unlikely to be confused with someone else. I don't know about Murakami's surname, though. Perhaps, he wishes for a more unique one, the redemptive function of novel writing filtering through his memories:

"I have collected so many memories, in my chest, the chest of my mind," he says with satisfaction. "I think everybody has a lot of memories of his or her own, but it's a special gift to find the right drawer. I can do that. If I need something, I can point to the right drawer."

That said, his books might be a pyramid of autobiographical episodes filtered through the sands of a lifetime and the mental world of a writer.

His called The Strange Library arrives in December. [edited link].

This is my first Murakami read, and so far I'm rating it 5 stars. For a "colorless" protagonist, Tsukuru's heartbreak and depression is intensely palpable and real. I'm also enjoying the whole experience of this read - the aesthetic of the book size, cover art, print style, etc.

Kristen, in my experience (I've read 5-6 of his books), this is one of his most approachable for a new Murakami reader. He often uses a form of magical realism to great effect in his books. This one has much less of that. I also suspect that it is the first book of two or three in a series. You and Asma will have to see what you think about that when you finish.

Asma wrote: "Neither of the main character's names Tsukuru Tazaki is on lists of commonly found Japanese surnames, so he's unlikely to be confused with someone else. I don't know about Murakami's surname, thou..."

That reminds me of the interview with Sjon where he said that a novel is a way for the author to hide himself in the book.

Maggie wrote: "a novel is a way for the author to hide himself in the book." Don't know why but reading this I had feeling the protagonist had a lot of the author in him. It seemed really sincere especially since the usual Murakami weirdness was so minimal and more integral to the story's themes. Perhaps also because of the natural storytelling style. Or maybe because I really got swept up in it and couldn't put it down and really want to believe it wasn't some artsy-fartsy charade. Anyway, a book that I could connect with.

Asma wrote: "So far, I think the main character is not colorless in himself because he learns his interests/pleasures/assets (railroad station structures; facility for languages) and successfully pursues them c..."

My impression was that Tsukuru was uncomfortable in defining himself, as if imposing one identity upon himself would be denying another part of himself. His name and identity were intermingled in that he was building himself into someone he could know and accept. He was not something static like a color but active and constantly undergoing change. Like the endlessly changing flow of people in a train station. Part of his epiphany was coming to terms with his social needs and reality. Another part was accepting the hollow part in himself and knowing who and what he was. The wisdom of Popeye the Sailor Man who used to say, "I yam what I yam" is not so easy to absorb. That is part of what made the ending so brilliant in my opinion.

Kristen wrote: "This is my first Murakami read, and so far I'm rating it 5 stars. For a "colorless" protagonist, Tsukuru's heartbreak and depression is intensely palpable and real. I'm also enjoying the whole ex..."

I read it on kindle but perused a tangible copy in the bookstore. So much thought and effort went into the object of the book itself. Props to the publishers. I shared your sense of his emotions being palpable and real. I've read quite of few of his other books and so I envy you reading him for the first time as it really is quite an exquisite experience. And even though this book has some similarities with previous works, I believe it is definitely different enough that you would not find the others stale should you choose to read the others. When I was at page 100 or so I was thinking I wanted to stop reading then because I was too scared that the story would dive into deep left field. The tension though throughout the book was just delicious and there was never a moment when the storytelling didn't have me wondering what was going to happen.

Kristen wrote: "This is my first Murakami read, and so far I'm rating it 5 stars. For a "colorless" protagonist, Tsukuru's heartbreak and depression is intensely palpable and real. I'm also enjoying the whole ex..."

Of the Murakami books I've read, this new one Colorless Tsukuru... exhibits the deepest emotions. The dream about jealousy, how heart wrenchingly it is delineated, as well as its being life changing, is imho a greater depth in Murakami's characterization. Reading this novel is an aesthetic experience (music, art) for the reader.

Maggie wrote: "... this is one of his most approachable for a new Murakami reader. He often uses a form of magical realism to great effect in his books. This one has much less of that..."

Of all Murakami's books, The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle displayed the most disconnected episodes. Kafka on the Shore was an adventure into magical realism, although that one is an endearing story.

Don wrote: "...Part of his epiphany was coming to terms with his social needs and reality. Another part was accepting the hollow part in himself and knowing who and what he was..."

It's sort of a coming-of-age transition when his university years parallel a deeper self-awareness and an experience of genuine, gut-level feelings. They startled and disturbed him, but those uncontrollable, disquieting feelings resurrected him.

Around page 70/71, Haida exemplifies the necessity "to be free" of mental and physical stasis, bringing in an episode from Arnold Wesker's play . To be free, Haida says,

"...means leaving behind your physical body. Leaving the cage of your physical flesh, breaking free of the chains, and letting pure logic soar free. Giving a natural life to logic. That's the core of free thought."

Tsukuru previously considered the possibility of his own blocked emotions. Tsukuru's blocked emotions about his former high school friends are bogged down. Imaginative, logical thinking about his disappointment and about other unspoken, tender memories might unshackle him . At any rate, Tsukuru is invigorated to converse with Haida.

Maggie wrote: "I also found it very interesting that the Japanese apparently take such notice of one's surname and how careful his father was to make sure his given name wouldn't weigh on him throughout life."

Though Tsukuru's name does not refer to any colors, in chapter 4 it is mentioned that being given a name is more important than being without a name and that his first- and sur-name carry meaning in the Japanese language. Tsukuru's father carefully considers the right "nuance", "which Chinese character he would use".

"...the character that meant "create," or the simpler one that meant "make" or "build"...",

while Tazaki meant "many peninsulas."

At the beginning of the novel, I didn't get a sense of how Tsukuru would overcome the confusion about his former high school friendships. From Haida's conversation about logic, it seemed that under Haida's influence, Tsukuru would apply logic to his consternation about his former friendships. But no, what happens comes face-to-face with reality. If spoilers don't bother you, gives some guidance about the plot. Where the site lapses on analysis, it makes up for in the list of additional articles.

[Edit: Maybe Haida's disappearance coincides with Tsukuru's adoption of Sara's realistic, face-to-face solution rather than Haida's purely logical one.]

Possibly, the main character Tsukuru Tazaki observed these church roofs during his visit to Hämmenlinna, Finland, says this .

This novel had some believability issues for me. For example:

(view spoiler)[
I'm kinda surprised that tsukuru never visited Shiro's family or visited her grave.

Three close friends believed that he didn't do any thing wrong and none of them thought of contacting him after her death to clear things up. wow. I would have been a little pissed.

Eri's husband leaving tsukuru in their house in woods alone...Especially seeing her reaction when seeing tsukuru and having just me him a few minutes ago.

(hide spoiler)]

It's been a few weeks since I read the book (so I may be wrong), but I thought I remember that Tsukuru didn't know she died. He was told by one of the others and then told that she had accused him of raping her and they never questioned it - essentially rubber stamping her accusation. I wouldn't have gone to her grave or visited her family either. I would have been so furious with her (no matter what her mental state was) that I wouldn't have anything to do with her or her family again (likewise the "friends" who supported her). Besides, maybe her family believed her, too. Would you want the rapist of your daughter to come to the house? How would you receive him?

As to Eri and her husband, I saw them as being kind of hippie-like - very welcoming and laid back. Also, I think he wanted to make sure that she had time alone with her friend without the destractions of the kids. Easiest way was to take the kids somewhere else. They'd already been for a walk, so to town was the next best option given how distant they lived from any neighbors.

Mekki wrote: "This novel had some believability issues for me. For example:


I'm kinda surprised that tsukuru never visited Shiro's family or visited her grave.

Three close friends believed that he didn't do ..."

On the three surviving friends not contacting him, perhaps guilt? They may have simply been too ashamed. Usually people find a reason to hate people that they have wronged so I was a little surprised they were not more hostile when he showed up. Tsukuru's ability to rise above the being pissed off reaction (which I too would definitely have been if I were not too numb from the impact of finding out I'd been accused of rape) is one of the things that made him a sympathetic character. If he had been whiny about it, not sure I would have like him as much as him being above the level of the "friends" whom I had the feeling he was not about to go back and visit again.

I had the exact same reaction though about the scene where he meets Eri again. At the time I remember thinking he really trusts his wife to speak up if she feels threatened. I also thought Eri and her husband must have had a really good relationship if he felt comfortable leaving her alone with what was essentially an old boyfriend. Eri was the one who really loved him and seemed to have turned out the best even though she wronged him most directly. She had the ability to accept hard choices I guess.

I was wondering if Eri's advice for Tsukuru to hold onto Sara was well intentioned or not. Tsukuru didn't really follow it to the letter by first rattle out of the box back home raising the issue of other men in her life with Sara. Eri had said don't let her know. Tsukuru seems intent on ruining it with Sara with the 4:00 call. Were the unanswered phone calls at the end Sara calling to call off their final date? I kind of think so. Going forward it seemed like the new Tsukuru seemed to have left his old passivity behind and might start controlling his own life.

Maggie wrote: "It's been a few weeks since I read the book (so I may be wrong), but I thought I remember that Tsukuru didn't know she died. He was told by one of the others and then told that she had accused him..."

I thinking about after he found out. Maybe he would think of visiting the grave since he would not be able to see her alive...also he didn't show the anger you mentioned. Anyway I thought it would have been a nice touch to issue condolences for his good friend, in some way...

We didnt get much insight in to shiro (sp) family. Maybe they were of the same opinion as his three friends, that he was innocent and that they needed to play along also...or maybe not :)

A lot of this novel leaves it up to the reader to guess at.

Is there ever any expectation of happy-ever-after with Murakami's characters? The main characters, often young men, are alone at the end but not without expectations of reunion. Ask a reader whether the probability of the m.c.'s sustaining a love relationship is a hopeful stretch? Based on the textual evidence, the m.c. might be too wishful.

Murakami doesn't judge his characters for moral slips. It's for other characters to demonstrate their feelings and to react. Because the characterization is often so good, I never get the sense of their being the portrayal of Murakami's feelings. Maybe this book Colorless Tsukuru... differs, being as some reviewers have written a turning point in Murakami's work, telling more autobiographical stories.

This novel's main character begins as passive, too caught by his own consciousness (coming-of-age) like some of M's other main characters. Their connections to other characters come-and-go, possessing an unreal dimension, creating a confusing conundrum/mystery about what's happened. Sometimes, his m.c.'s want to penetrate the irrational, supernatural laws of nature with their own consciousnesses. In the everyday world, their relationships with others move from concreteness to illusoriness with puzzling disappearances about which the m.c. discovers mysterious deceptions.

Mekki wrote: "...Three close friends believed that he didn't do any thing wrong and none of them thought of contacting him after her death to clear things up..."

In chapter 9 (@pp154-55) Tsukuru learns of Shiro's passing from Sara when she delivers to him the envelope which contains his former friends' current whereabouts. But, as to the circumstances surrounding Shiro and her accusation of Tsukuru, Sara remains silent. But, she inspires him to straighten out his confusion by speaking to them face to face, as Don noted about Tsukuru's greater assertiveness to find out. So, he's confronted at least twice about Shiro's death, by Sara and then by his friends. Like Maggie said above, the friends told him the circumstances he needed to know, unspoken-of events he wouldn't have discovered if he'd not actively sought answers.

Asma wrote "the circumstances he needed to know, unspoken-of events he wouldn't have discovered if he'd not actively sought answers."

- Ah! Thanks so much for that comment, Asma. It triggered the thought that Tsukuru is something of a Telemachus figure from The Odyssey. I can't believe I hadn't thought of comparing and contrasting the two before. In hindsight it seems obvious. Someone somewhere is reputedly supposed to have said (I wish I could remember where I heard this) that all literature can be understood as a variation on either the Iliad, the Odyssey, or the Aeneid, and this would seem to bear that out.

Don wrote: "...Tsukuru is something of a Telemachus figure from The Odyssey. I can't believe I hadn't thought of comparing and contrasting the two before..."

In of The Odyssey Athena is Telemachus's prescient knowledge-giver and his inspiration to assert his demands to the lingering suitors and then to travel to gather information about his absent father Odysseus. In Chapter 9 of Colorless Tsukuru... Sara similarly is Tsukuru's muse, giving him technologically sourced information and advising him to travel for enlightenment about his friends' unexplained banishment of him sixteen years ago.

There's a few trivia questions about this novel at Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ.

Asma wrote: "Don wrote: "...Tsukuru is something of a Telemachus figure from The Odyssey. I can't believe I hadn't thought of comparing and contrasting the two before..."

In Book 1 of The Odyssey Athena is Tel..."

Well put.

Asma wrote: "There's a few trivia questions about this novel at Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ."

Thanks - I liked the one that you added.

Asma wrote: "Don wrote: "...Tsukuru is something of a Telemachus figure from The Odyssey. I can't believe I hadn't thought of comparing and contrasting the two before..."

In Book 1 of The Odyssey Athena is Tel..."
Thanks Asma. Thats a nice bit of information..

What do you think of the sensitive points on Tsukuru's back?

From chapter 1
"He wasn’t normally conscious of it, but there was one part of his body that was extremely sensitive, somewhere along his back. This soft, subtle spot he couldn’t reach was usually covered by something, so that it was invisible to the naked eye. But when, for whatever reason, that spot became exposed and someone’s finger pressed down on it, something inside him would stir. A special substance would be secreted, swiftly carried by his bloodstream to every corner of his body. That special stimulus was both a physical sensation and a mental one, creating vivid images in his mind."

He also gets another piercing pain in his back in chapter 18

Don wrote: "...Tsukuru is something of a Telemachus figure from The Odyssey. I can't believe I hadn't thought of comparing and contrasting the two before. In hindsight it seems obvious...."

Don, your idea to compare/contrast Homer's Telemachus with Murakami's Tsukuru
is plausible. And, thanks for your compliments above.

Mekki wrote: "What do you think of the sensitive points on Tsukuru's back?..."

Great question. At first I thought it was a physical manifestation of his sensitivity, something of a symbol of his vulnerability. But now I've got Greeks on the brain and am wondering if maybe Murakami is invoking the mythic bodily flaws such as those of Achilles (heel), Odysseus (scars on thigh), Philoctetes (leg), Hephasteaus (club foot)...He is putting it in another part of the body - the spine - perhaps to reinforce Tsukuru's apparent lack of willfulness. Maybe worth chewing on a little - Japanese creation myths and note that when Ainu created the first people their backs were made of willow and their first children were entirely boneless.

Mekki wrote: "...Thats a nice bit of information..."

Mekki wrote: "...Three close friends believed that he didn't do any thing wrong and none of them thought of contacting him after her death to clear things up. wow. I would have been a little pissed...."

Thanks, Mekki. In chapter 10, Ao's views about Tsukuru's personality contrasts with Tsukuru's view of himself,

"...you were always the handsome one, the boy who made a good impression. Clean, neat, well dressed, and polite. You always made sure to greet people nicely, and never said anything stupid. You didn't smoke, hardly touched alcohol, were always on time. Did you know that all our mothers were big fans of yours?...having you there, we could be ourselves. You didn't say much but you had your feet solidly planted on the ground and that gave the group a sense of security. Like an anchor."

That description takes Tsukuru by surprise. He is perceived as levelheaded, not prone to fly off the handle to others. Since the high-school days occurred before the start of this story, the reader must take Ao's description of Tsukuru's role in the group. Since the reader of this story has insight into Tsukuru's mind, the reader sees Tsukuru's point of view, Tsukuru seeming to me anyway as introverted especially with shocking news; as he says, his mind and body disconnected.

Don wrote: "...On the three surviving friends not contacting him, perhaps guilt? They may have simply been too ashamed...."

Aka says in chapter 11 that he and the others assumed that Tsukuru knew about Shiro's death from his parents or from somewhere else. And, Tsukuru's not attending the funeral meant that Tsukuru didn't care to go there. The question might be asked, "Why didn't Tsukuru's parents tell him?" Just speculative as to what T's parents knew about Shiro's accusations of Tsukuru and as to how hushed those accusations were. Very likely, T's parents in Nagoya would have known about an unsolved crime of strangulation about one of T's former friends.

Got this this morning at the local library, will share my thoughts in next couple of days :-)

Don wrote: "...Japanese creation myths...note that when Ainu created the first people their backs were made of willow and their first children were entirely boneless...

The Japanese creational stories and the related stories of Izanagi and Izanami you pointed out @ crystalinks told among other things how the pair created the eight major Japanese islands. It's amazing how many gods there are: Handbook of Japanese Mythology.

Andrew wrote: "Got this this morning at the local library, will share my thoughts in next couple of days :-)"

Enjoy!

Asma wrote: "Don wrote: "...On the three surviving friends not contacting him, perhaps guilt? They may have simply been too ashamed...."

Aka says in chapter 11 that he and the others assumed that Tsukuru knew ..."

Yes, that's a good point. Tsukuru and his family do seem to be quite distant. On the friends, as you point out, they were making quite a few assumptions. I do think Mekki's comment "Three close friends believed that he didn't do any thing wrong and none of them thought of contacting him after her death to clear things up. wow. I would have been a little pissed" is apt and asks us to examine whether this a plot flaw or whether Murakami is asking us to look more closely at what friends say and do to each other.

Don wrote: "...asks us to examine whether this a plot flaw or whether Murakami is asking us to look more closely at what friends say and do to each other..."

During Sara and Tsukuru's catching-up conversation about T's visit to Ao and Aka in Nagoya, for me there was much reference to the psychology of adolescence--the perfect circle of friends which dominated T's life because of its vitality on him. Sara and he go also into her adolescent years. Strangely, each of those two main characters had extraordinarily different experiences, perhaps because of gender. Teens would find something in this book.

Also, I found Tsukuru's conversation with the "guru" Aka realistic, regarding the latter's series of experiences (academia, corporate, own business) before his finding complementary work for his personality. Aka's views might orient adolescents considering their future work to think for themselves. Like Sara's adolescence, Aka's adult pathway differs from Tsukuru's, as Tsukuru knew his penchant (railroad stations) from the get-go. There's just not one way.

Asma wrote: "There's just not one way.
..."
Please God forbid I not suggest there is only one way to read this work. Thanks so much for your very thoughtful comment. I agree wholeheartedly that teens would find resonance in this book. This book could easily be read as a YA work. Aka is a very interesting character. I think Murakami was very deliberate in presenting Aka in an ambiguous manner - from one perspective as sleazy management consultant type and from another as someone offering a valuable insight into corporate culture. Traditionally literature depicts commerce as something icky, but I think Murakami, with his experience running a club, would never buy into that mindset. I also keep thinking that train stations are very similar to nightclubs - both are spaces through which masses of people pass - further lending support to the notion that there is an autobiographical element to this.

Don wrote: "...train stations are very similar to nightclubs - both are spaces through which masses of people pass..."

Article about the relevance of to Colorless Tsukuru....

What an incredible book. After this, my first Murakami read, I am officially a fan and can't wait to absorb more of his writing.

So much to think about post-read....mostly I'm thinking about how my first experience of heartbreak, when I was about TT's age, felt like the end of the world. Life couldn't possible go on with that level of pain. And yet it did...like the movement of 3.5 million passengers through the Shinjuku Station every day, I kept moving, and decades later I look back on that experience as one of, but not the most significant, of many others.

I don't want to believe that TT's emotional issues from events some 16 years prior would prevent him from continuing his relationship with Sara - but my impression is that while he finally comes to terms with what he's all about, it's not good enough for Sara. I didn't like Sara anyway! Tsukuru is now ready for better, imo, if he allows himself the chance.

Kristen wrote: "...while he finally comes to terms with what he's all about, it's not good enough for Sara. I didn't like Sara anyway!..."

In chapter 13 Tsukuru observes Sara hand-in-hand with someone else, appraising her ease with him, whereas the Sara he knew was less at ease. There are some suspicions about Sara's life outside of her time with Tsukuru. Her persona to Tsukuru seems false or dramatized.

False - yes - or staged and unnatural. I didn't really trust Sara from the start.

Sara is indeed a mysterious character and I'm not sure what her motivations might have been. May need to reread the book again to ponder that as well as better appreciate the great train station article that Asma linked to. As Asma pointed out earlier Sarah might be seen as an Athena figure to Tsukuru's Telemachus. In a novel in which names are so important, the name "Sara" might also be seen to invoke the Old Testament Sarah who was both wife and half-sister to Abraham. Sarah (like Athena) had no children. Her name was originally "Sara" but God changed her name to Sarah as part of a covenant after the servant Hagar bore Abraham his first son, Ishmael, with Sarah's knowledge and agreement. I guess she was no stranger to the phrase "It's complicated." Possibly related, early on I believe Tsukuru mentioned that he thought his father could have had a mistress but the mistress never makes an appearance - or does she? Could that account for Sarah's interest in Tsukuru? It didn't appear to be for casual sex. Maybe his apparently handsome good looks and complex personality would have been enough to spark the attraction, however, short or long that may have been.

This novel leaves room for a lot of possibilities between the lines because authorial details are omitted and readers naturally draw out connections/coincidences with the story's facts. An author's godlike creations still leave a lot to fill in with a reader's imagination.

In chapter 15, there's another one of those examples of harmonious relationships, the first obvious example having been the group of five teens. Similarly, Eri, a member of that former group, now an adult with children, is portrayed in a perfect relationship with the Finnish potter Edvard. Into their remote vacation home Tsukuru steps unannounced but for their barking dog. His longterm success as a builder of railroad stations has not spread to his personal relationships.

I finally discovered what Murakami wanted to say and got an inkling into Tsukuru's pilgrimage (of the title). In Chapter 16, Murakami gives Tsukuru another introspective moment but this one is an epiphany for him. He realizes what "true harmony" between him and another is,

"One heart is not connected to another through harmony alone. They are, instead, linked deeply through their wounds. Pain linked to pain, fragility to fragility. There is no silence without a cry of grief, no forgiveness without bloodshed, no acceptance without a passage through acute loss. That is what lies at the root of true harmony." (abt p319)

Tsukuru's new understanding parallels at the same moments Eri's and his tearful embrace over the remembered loss of Yuzu. The startling passage is its revision of Tsukuru's idea about true harmony. In that passage also is Eri's explanation of Tsukuru's unexplained banishment, a logical explanation of what motivated his close friends to banish him. Her story about Yuzu is terrible but it also indicates that there were never any hard feelings about Tsukuru. Since then, the "flow of time" has led each of the five into life-altering experiences. Tsukuru/Eri's opening the "drawer of memories" spills out grief but also brings the two characters together again.

That same passage stopped me in my tracks. It's exquisite. I read it over and over and then read it aloud to my husband. Beautiful.

Kristen, that emotive episode, surrounding the phrase "One heart is not connected to another through harmony alone..., was so intensely written, it seemed autobiographical, as if Murakami had felt all the sadness Tsukuru and Eri were experiencing then.

"As we go through life, we gradually discover who we are, but the more we discover, the more we lose ourselves."

I really enjoyed the novel, though was left somewhat flat following the slightly ambiguous ending. I expected some great revelation which never came, even formulating my own theories in my head which became less likely the closer to the end I got.

For some reason, I suspected Haida - of all people - the friend who vanished unexpectantly would end up being Shiro's murderer. However Tsukuru never really got to the bottom of Shiro's story after his exile. I personally wish the book had been slightly longer to resolve that, but the book was not weak without it.

I totally connected with Tsukuru, as I too have felt this type of exclusion (perhaps not to the same degree!) from peers in my teenage years. The same feelings that nothing matters, that you are worthless and despite people telling you good things about you, never believing them to be true.

All-in-all, the novel was a stunning piece of fiction, with many memorable quotes which will live with me for some time. This being my first Murakami, I have certainly become very interested in reading more by him, that's for sure.