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Sometimes when my ex-husband was angry and drunk his posture would change. It wasn’t upright with his shoulders back. It wasn’t just that his hands would curl into fists. It was the movement of his arms, the hunching of his shoulders, how his legs suddenly pointed out when he walked, how his chest expanded, how his arms swung.

“He looks like a gorilla,� I would think usually backing up, hands out, placating. “Just like a gorilla.�

It seemed ridiculous to me, a ...