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“A denizen since birth, I liked to think I knew the city in every way. It bore my shadow so gracefully, that living here almost suited me. It took me a long time to understand that, which was fully irredeemable—it was people I was finicky about. The drawbridge between my soul and the world barely ever lowered. Friends mocked my academic bearing; colleagues disliked my logorrhea; and what to say of women—they mostly found me irrelevant. In the language of the alchemists, I stood at the point of nigredo, the center of my own darkness.”