

“One of the few good things about modern times: If you die horribly on television, you will not have died in vain. You will have entertained us.”
―
―

“I was a victim of a series of accidents, as are we all.”
― The Sirens of Titan
― The Sirens of Titan

“Maturity is a bitter disappointment for which no remedy exists, unless laughter could be said to remedy anything.”
―
―

“1492. As children we were taught to memorize this year with pride and joy as the year people began living full and imaginative lives on the continent of North America. Actually, people had been living full and imaginative lives on the continent of North America for hundreds of years before that. 1492 was simply the year sea pirates began to rob, cheat, and kill them.”
―
―

“A saint is a person who behaves decently in a shockingly indecent society.”
― A Man Without a Country
― A Man Without a Country
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