Can You Spot a Victim
I have received so many emails on domestic violence concerning how you can spot a victim of domestic violence.
The most obvious answer I receive when speaking publicly and asking the audience this question is the bruises. Although that is a sure telltale sign it is not the only one.
Some victims don't wear bruises where they can be easily seen. They have bruises that can easily be covered by clothing, or none at all.
Now when I tell my audience that they may have none at all I have some who ask me how can someone be a victim and not have a bruise? Domestic violence victims aren't always beaten, or hit, some are abused mentally. This to me is one of the most dangerous forms of domestic violence. The victim is slowly convinced that the only person they need in their life is their abuser.
Which comes back to the original question: Can you spot a victim?
Aside from bruises, does your friend or loved still hang out with the same people? Have their habits changed? Do they still spend time with family or friends? If so, is it less time? Do they make excuses as to why they can't go each time they are asked to go somewhere? Has there demeanor changed? Do they seem less outgoing? Does it seem as though that the only person they care to spend time with is their significant other? Do they seem depressed or just not themselves? Then nine times out of ten they are a victim.
So when you see a friend that no longer wants to have lunch every Friday, hardly ever sees their family anymore, doesn't want to talk on the phone the way they used to, doesn't seem to smile as much and makes up excuses for not being around family and friends,they are most likely a victim. Try your best to talk to them. However, the victim of this type of domestic violence is very difficult to talk to because their significant other makes them believe that talking to others is disloyal. That victim is drawn into a dark world that they can't seem to find any hope of light. You have to do your best to talk to them, but be careful, you will never get a chance to discuss the situation if the abuser is present. Need more info? Inbox me or email me at [email protected]
The most obvious answer I receive when speaking publicly and asking the audience this question is the bruises. Although that is a sure telltale sign it is not the only one.
Some victims don't wear bruises where they can be easily seen. They have bruises that can easily be covered by clothing, or none at all.
Now when I tell my audience that they may have none at all I have some who ask me how can someone be a victim and not have a bruise? Domestic violence victims aren't always beaten, or hit, some are abused mentally. This to me is one of the most dangerous forms of domestic violence. The victim is slowly convinced that the only person they need in their life is their abuser.
Which comes back to the original question: Can you spot a victim?
Aside from bruises, does your friend or loved still hang out with the same people? Have their habits changed? Do they still spend time with family or friends? If so, is it less time? Do they make excuses as to why they can't go each time they are asked to go somewhere? Has there demeanor changed? Do they seem less outgoing? Does it seem as though that the only person they care to spend time with is their significant other? Do they seem depressed or just not themselves? Then nine times out of ten they are a victim.
So when you see a friend that no longer wants to have lunch every Friday, hardly ever sees their family anymore, doesn't want to talk on the phone the way they used to, doesn't seem to smile as much and makes up excuses for not being around family and friends,they are most likely a victim. Try your best to talk to them. However, the victim of this type of domestic violence is very difficult to talk to because their significant other makes them believe that talking to others is disloyal. That victim is drawn into a dark world that they can't seem to find any hope of light. You have to do your best to talk to them, but be careful, you will never get a chance to discuss the situation if the abuser is present. Need more info? Inbox me or email me at [email protected]
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