Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ

Just a note to readers of this little niche on the web, I have changed the 'about' of this blog: all previous posts had to do with me talking about what I learnt on my self-publishing journey in hopes it was useful to someone, somewhere.

As of now, I've decided that the world is far too large for there not to be more people like me, a group that encompasses students who are authors in their spare time.

All such people are liable to have the same pains of balancing school and authoring as I do, and so I figured I'd connect with such souls right here.

Not sure how much 'connecting' I will actually do, because I'm far more likely to hide behind a book than be social, which is why the book that I have actually written-

One Day You'll Find Me

-is just another book lost in the torrent of new books published left right and centre on the web and in the world today.

Because I really don't like social media. I just cannot be bothered with it. It takes far too much effort and time that could just as easily be spent doing the schoolwork I'm supposed to be doing right now, actually, or reading.

As the latter option is obviously far more appealing I tend to opt for it over... anything else. Did you know I completed my 2015 Å·±¦ÓéÀÖ Reading Challenge 22 books AHEAD of schedule, for a total of 100 books, yesterday? Boom.

It's not even correct, because it doesn't let me count books I re-read in the same year. So there's actually another 10 or so in that count.

Needless to say, I spend A LOT of time reading.

That's how I get stuck in the following cycle:

I read because I love it.

I read some more because I don't want to do my schoolwork.

I read even more because I didn't do my schoolwork and now I'm behind and I want to cry because there's so much to do I can't even find somewhere to start catching up.

I read to drown out that panicky feeling I get when I start thinking about the previous point... which only makes it worse because I'm then further behind and suddenly I'm reading 5 books a week.

Sigh.

On top of that, final exams are looming in the coming weeks! My 12 years of mandatory education will be complete in a matter of weeks and suddenly I'm going to set loose in this huge world

and

with all of the responsibility, the forms to be filled out, the decisions to be made, Official Things to organise, government organisations to deal with... it's too much.

I'm so overwhelmed I can't even mentally look at the To Do list without my heading hurting and wanting to cry.

Therefore, being 18 sucks.

The end of life as I know it is scary as anything, and since I'm leaving home when my exams are over, 'the beginning of the end' really is true. My future is spread out before me, and it's exhilarating and terrifying at the same time.

I haven't written a word on my next novel in months because I feel guilty for spending that time on it when I have the afore mentioned things that have to be done.

I am one hundred percent sure that I am not a unique person in that this only happens to me: to reader who can relate- Hello :)

I can't say how well I'll manage to post on this blog, but I figured for the few times I do, I might end up connecting with someone awesome. And I might make someone feel not so alone in this depressing situation.

For me, that's an improvement on right now and I'm cool with that. :)

Wherever you are in the world, hope you're enjoying your right now.

~Kelly